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dear_dakanda 2019年02月16日(土) 00:26:26履歴
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See them tumbling down
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Pledging their love
to the ground
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Way out West
there was this fella.
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00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:46,546
Fella I wanna tell you about.
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Fella by the name
of Jeff Lebowski.
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00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:53,803
Least that was the handle that
his loving parents gave him.
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But he never had
much use for it himself.
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This Lebowski,
he called himself the Dude.
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Now Dude,
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that's a name no one would
self-apply where I come from.
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But then there was a lot about the Dude that
didn't make a whole lot of sense to me,
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and a lot about
where he lived likewise.
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Drifting along with
the tumbling tumbleweeds
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But then again,
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maybe that's why I found the
place so darned interesting.
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I know when night has gone
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That a new world's
born at dawn
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They call Los Angeles
the City of Angels.
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I didn't find it to be that,
exactly.
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But I'll allow there are
some nice folks there.
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Course, l can't say
I seen London,
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and I never been to France,
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and l ain't never seen no queen in her
damned undies, as the fella says.
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But I'll tell you what,
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after seeing Los Angeles and this
here story I'm about to unfold,
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well, I guess
I've seen something
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every bit as stupefying as you can
see in any of those other places,
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00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:05,374
and in English, too.
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So l can die with
a smile on my face
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without feeling like
the good Lord gypped me.
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Now, this here story
I'm about to unfold
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took place back
in the early '90s,
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just about the time of our conflict
with Saddam and the Iraqis.
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I only mention it 'cause
sometimes there's a man...
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I won't say a hero.
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'Cause what's a hero?
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But sometimes there's a man...
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And I'm talking about
the Dude here.
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Sometimes there's a man...
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Well, he's the man
for his time and place.
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He fits right in there.
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And that's the Dude
in Los Angeles.
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And even if he is a lazy man,
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and the Dude was
most certainly that,
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quite possibly the laziest
in Los Angeles county,
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which would place him high in the
running for laziest worldwide.
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But sometimes there's a man...
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Sometimes there's a man...
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Well, I lost my train
of thought here.
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00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:16,821
But...
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Hell, I done introduced him
enough.
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...with them all
for a collective action.
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This will not stand.
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This will not stand, this
aggression against Kuwait.
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Here on the range I belong
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Drifting along
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With the tumbling
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Tumbleweeds
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Where's the money,
Lebowski?
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00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:03,242
I want that money,
Lebowski.
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00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:05,786
Bunny says you're
good for it.
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00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:11,042
Where's the money,
Lebowski?
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Where's the fucking money,
shithead?
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It's down there somewhere.
Let me take another look.
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Don't fuck with us.
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00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,806
Your wife owes money
to Jackie Treehorn,
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00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:28,768
that means you owe money
to Jackie Treehorn.
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Ever thus to deadbeats,
Lebowski.
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No, don't do. ..
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See what happens, Lebowski?
You see what happens?
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Nobody calls me Lebowski.
You got the wrong guy.
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I'm the Dude, man.
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Your name's Lebowski,
Lebowski.
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Your wife is Bunny.
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My wife? Bunny?
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Do you see a wedding ring
on my finger?
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Does this place look like
I'm fucking married?
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The toilet seat's up, man!
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What the fuck is this?
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Obviously you're
not a golfer.
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Woo?
Yeah.
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Isn't this guy supposed
to be a millionaire?
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Fuck.
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Yeah. What do you think?
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He looks like
a fucking loser.
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Hey, at least I'm housebroken.
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Fucking time-waster.
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Thanks a lot,
asshole.
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La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
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La-la-la, la, la, la, la
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La-la-la, la, la, la-la la-la
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La, la, la-la
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La-la-la
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La-la-la, la-la-la
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La-la, la-la
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The man in me will do
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Nearly any task
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And as for compensation
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There's little he would ask
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Take a woman like you
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To get through
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To the man in me
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Storm clouds are raging
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All around my door
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I think to myself
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I might not take it anymore
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Take a woman like your kind
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To find the man in me
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But, oh
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What a wonderful feeling
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Just to know that you are near
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Sets my heart a-reeling
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From my toes
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Up to my ears
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The man in me will
hide sometimes
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To keep from being seen
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But that's just because
he doesn't want
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To turn into some machine
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Take a woman like you
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To get through
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To the man in me
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I'm throwing rocks tonight.
Mark it, Dude.
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I'm telling you, this was a valued rug.
This was a. ..
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Yeah, man. It really
tied the room together.
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This was
a valued. ..
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What tied the room together, Dude?
My rug.
128
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Were you listening to the
Dude's story, Donny?
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00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:01,272
What?
Walter.
130
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:04,066
Were you listening to the Dude's story?
I was bowling.
131
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:06,402
So you have no frame of
reference here, Donny.
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You're like a child who wanders into the
middle of a movie and wants to know. ..
133
00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:12,825
Walter, what's the point, man?
There's no reason, here's my point, Dude.
134
00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:14,535
There's no fucking reason
why these two. ..
135
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:15,786
Yeah, Walter,
what's your point?
136
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Walter, what is the. ..
137
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:20,374
Look, we all know
who is at fault here.
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00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,668
What the fuck are you
talking about? Huh?
139
00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:25,462
No, what the fuck
are you. . . I'm not. ..
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We're talking about unchecked
aggression here, Dude.
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What the fuck is he talking about?
My rug.
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Forget it, Donny!
You're out of your element!
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00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,638
Walter, the Chinaman
who peed on my rug,
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00:08:34,723 --> 00:08:36,557
I can't go
give him a bill!
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00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,309
So what the fuck
are you talking about?
146
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:39,518
What the fuck are
you talking about?
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00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,729
The Chinaman is not
the issue here, Dude!
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00:08:41,813 --> 00:08:44,398
I'm talking about drawing
a line in the sand, Dude.
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00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,901
Across this line
you do not. ..
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00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:51,071
Also, Dude, "Chinaman" is not
the preferred nomenclature.
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00:08:51,156 --> 00:08:52,781
Asian-American,
please.
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00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:56,285
Walter, this isn't a guy who built the
railroads here. This is a guy. ..
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What the fuck
are you. ..
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Walter, he peed on my rug!
He peed on the Dude's rug.
155
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,750
Donny, you're out
of your element.
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00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:06,128
Dude, the Chinaman
is not the issue here.
157
00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:08,631
So, who. ..
Jeff Lebowski.
158
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,842
The other Jeffrey Lebowski.
The millionaire.
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00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:14,678
That's fucking interesting, man.
That's fucking interesting.
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00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:18,724
Plus, he has the wealth,
obviously, and the resources,
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so that there's no reason,
there's no fucking reason
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why his wife should go out
and owe money all over town,
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and then they come and they
pee on your fucking rug!
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00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,025
Am I wrong?
No.
165
00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,652
Am I wrong?
Yeah, but. ..
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00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:30,778
Okay then.
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That rug really tied the
room together, did it not?
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00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:37,618
Fucking A.
And this guy peed on it.
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00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,036
Donny, please.
170
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,287
You know, this is
the fucking guy. ..
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00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:42,665
I could find this
fucking Lebowski guy.
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00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:45,084
His name is Lebowski?
That's your name, Dude.
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00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:49,463
This is the guy who should
compensate me for the fucking rug.
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00:09:49,547 --> 00:09:53,175
His wife goes out and owes money all
over town, and they pee on my rug?
175
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,302
They pee on
your fucking rug?
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00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:58,097
Peed on my fucking rug.
That's right, Dude.
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00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:01,850
They peed on
your fucking rug.
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00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,145
This is the study.
179
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,815
As you can see, the various
commendations, awards. ..
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00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:11,819
"Jeffrey Lebowski." . ..
citations, honorary degrees, et cetera.
181
00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:15,572
Very impressive.
Oh, please feel free to inspect them.
182
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,284
Oh. No, I'm not really. ..
Oh, please. Please.
183
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:20,286
That is the key to
the city of Pasadena,
184
00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:25,749
which Mr. Lebowski received two years ago
in recognition of his various civic. ..
185
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:30,504
Oh ! That's the Los Angeles Chamber
of Commerce Business Achiever Award,
186
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,756
which is given. ..
Oh, not necessarily given every year.
187
00:10:32,841 --> 00:10:33,924
Hey, is this. ..
188
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,259
Given only when there's
a worthy somebody. ..
189
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,635
Is this him with Nancy?
190
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,972
Yes, indeed, that is Mr.
Lebowski with the first lady, yes.
191
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,265
It was taken
when Mrs. Reagan. ..
192
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,976
That's Lebowski
on the left there?
193
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,812
Of course. Mr. Lebowski, on the left.
.. So he's a. ..
194
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,481
You know, a handicapped
kind of guy?
195
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:51,734
Mr. Lebowski is
disabled, yes.
196
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:55,571
This picture was taken when Mrs.
Reagan was first lady of the nation.
197
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:56,739
Yes, yes.
198
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:58,782
Not of California.
Good shot.
199
00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:01,076
In fact, he met privately
with the President,
200
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,912
though, unfortunately, there wasn't
enough time for a photo opportunity.
201
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,956
Oh, Nancy's pretty good.
Oh, wonderful woman.
202
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:08,334
We were very happy to. ..
These are. ..
203
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:11,086
Oh, those are Mr.
Lebowski's children, so to speak.
204
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,421
Different mothers, huh?
205
00:11:12,547 --> 00:11:14,840
No, they're not. ..
Racially, he's pretty cool?
206
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,385
They're not literally
his children.
207
00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:20,721
They're the Little Lebowski
Urban Achievers,
208
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,849
inner city children of promise, but
without the necessary means for. ..
209
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:25,934
Necessary means for
a higher education,
210
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:29,438
so Mr. Lebowski is committed to
sending all of them to college.
211
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,856
Excuse me.
Oh, geez.
212
00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:32,691
Thank you. Thank you.
213
00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:37,279
Far out. Think he's got room for one more?
One. . . Oh.
214
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,157
You never went to college.
215
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:42,326
Please, don't touch that.
Oh, yeah, yeah. No, I did,
216
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:44,703
but, you know,
I spent most of my time
217
00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:47,915
occupying various
administration buildings,
218
00:11:47,999 --> 00:11:49,708
smoking a lot
of Thai stick,
219
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:53,045
breaking into the ROTC
and bowling.
220
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,381
Tell you the truth, Brandt,
I don't remember most of it.
221
00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:04,348
Okay, sir.
You're a Lebowski, I'm a Lebowski.
222
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:06,183
That's terrific.
223
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:09,144
But I am very busy,
as I imagine you are.
224
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:11,897
What can I do for you, sir?
225
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:15,526
Well, sir,
it's this rug I have.
226
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,611
It really tied
the room together.
227
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:20,406
You told Brandt on the phone.
He told me.
228
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,990
Where do I fit in?
229
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:25,911
Well, they were looking
for you, these two guys.
230
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,955
You know, they. ..
I'll say it again.
231
00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:31,166
You told Brandt on the phone.
He told me.
232
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,293
I know what happened.
Yes, yes.
233
00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:36,588
Oh, so you know that they were
trying to piss on your rug.
234
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:38,882
Did I urinate on your rug?
235
00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,218
You mean, did you personally
come and pee on my rug?
236
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,262
Hello! Do you speak
English, sir?
237
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:45,222
¿Parla usted inglés?
238
00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:48,183
I'll ask you again.
Did I urinate on your rug?
239
00:12:49,018 --> 00:12:51,603
No. Like I said,
Woo peed on my rug.
240
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,355
I just want to
understand this, sir.
241
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:57,359
Every time a rug is micturated
upon in this fair city,
242
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:59,194
I have to compensate
the person?
243
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:02,489
Come on, man.
I'm not trying to scam anybody here.
244
00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:04,408
You know, I'm just. ..
245
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:08,036
You're just looking for
a handout like every other. ..
246
00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,665
Are you employed,
Mr. Lebowski?
247
00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:15,085
Wait. Let me explain
something to you.
248
00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:17,004
I am not Mr. Lebowski.
249
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:20,048
You're Mr. Lebowski.
I'm the Dude.
250
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,634
So that's what you call me.
You know?
251
00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:24,803
That or His Dudeness,
252
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:27,347
or Duder or, you know,
253
00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:30,476
El Duderino, if you're not
into the whole brevity thing.
254
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,561
Are you employed, sir?
255
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,230
Employed?
256
00:13:36,399 --> 00:13:41,153
You don't go out looking for a job
dressed like that, do you? On a weekday?
257
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:42,613
Is this a. ..
258
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:45,824
What day is this?
Well, I do work, sir.
259
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:50,078
So, if you don't mind. ..
No, I do mind. The Dude minds.
260
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,914
This will not stand, you know.
261
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,500
This aggression
will not stand, man.
262
00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:56,335
I mean,
your wife owes money. ..
263
00:13:56,419 --> 00:13:59,379
My wife is not
the issue here!
264
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,841
I hope that someday my wife will
learn to live on her allowance,
265
00:14:02,926 --> 00:14:04,343
which is ample.
266
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:07,262
But if she does not, that
is her problem, not mine,
267
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,972
just as the rug
is your problem.
268
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:13,018
Just as every bum's lot in life
is his own responsibility,
269
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,812
regardless of who
he chooses to blame.
270
00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:18,982
I didn't blame anyone
for the loss of my legs.
271
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:21,527
Some Chinaman took them
from me in Korea.
272
00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:24,029
But I went out
and achieved anyway.
273
00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:28,492
I cannot solve your problems, sir.
Only you can.
274
00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,038
Well, fuck it.
Oh, fuck it.
275
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,208
Yes, that's your answer.
That's your answer to everything.
276
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:38,043
Tattoo it on your forehead!
277
00:14:38,127 --> 00:14:40,587
Your revolution is over,
Mr. Lebowski!
278
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:43,924
Condolences! The bums lost!
279
00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:47,219
My advice to you is to do
what your parents did!
280
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,096
Get a job, sir!
281
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:51,723
The bums will
always lose!
282
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,559
Do you hear me,
Lebowski?
283
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:56,061
The bums will
always lose.
284
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,606
How was your meeting,
Mr. Lebowski?
285
00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:01,191
Okay.
286
00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:03,777
The old man told me to take
any rug in the house.
287
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:06,113
Well, enjoy.
288
00:15:06,197 --> 00:15:08,740
And perhaps we'll see you
again sometime, Dude.
289
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:09,950
Yeah, sure.
290
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:12,911
If I'm in the neighborhood,
you know,
291
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,582
and I need to use the john.
292
00:15:27,218 --> 00:15:29,386
Blow on them.
Huh?
293
00:15:29,846 --> 00:15:31,722
Go ahead. Blow.
294
00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:36,852
You want me to blow
on your toes?
295
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,520
Uh-huh.
296
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,023
I can't blow that far.
297
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,281
Are you sure he won't mind?
298
00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:52,451
Uli doesn't care about anything.
He's a nihilist.
299
00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:54,786
Oh, that must be exhausting.
300
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,622
You're not blowing.
301
00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,458
Our guest has to be getting along, Mrs.
Lebowski.
302
00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:00,959
Oh!
303
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,919
You're Bunny.
304
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:06,381
I'll suck your cock
for $1,000.
305
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:12,721
Wonderful woman.
306
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,931
We're all very fond of her.
Very free-spirited.
307
00:16:15,016 --> 00:16:17,726
Brandt can't watch though,
or he has to pay $1 00.
308
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,896
That's marvelous.
309
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:25,901
I'm just gonna go
find a cash machine.
310
00:16:30,531 --> 00:16:32,574
I'm slamming them tonight!
311
00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:34,951
You guys are dead
in the water.
312
00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:37,996
All right!
Way to go, Donny!
313
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:41,416
"If you will it,
it is no dream."
314
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:44,920
Fucking 20 minutes late, man.
What the fuck is that?
315
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:47,005
Theodore Herzl.
Huh?
316
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:50,175
State of Israel.
If you will it, Dude, it is no dream.
317
00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:52,135
What the fuck are you
talking about, man?
318
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:55,097
The carrier.
What's in the fucking carrier? Huh?
319
00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:58,141
Oh ! Cynthia's dog.
Think it's a Pomeranian.
320
00:16:58,226 --> 00:17:00,227
Can't leave him home alone
or he eats the furniture.
321
00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:03,063
I'm watching it while Cynthia and
Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.
322
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,065
You brought a fucking
Pomeranian bowling?
323
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:06,692
What do you mean,
brought it bowling?
324
00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:09,778
I didn't rent it shoes.
I'm not buying it a fucking beer.
325
00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,947
He's not taking your
fucking turn, Dude.
326
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:15,367
Man, if my fucking ex-wife asked
me to take care of her fucking dog
327
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,202
while she and her boyfriend
went to Honolulu,
328
00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:19,871
I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
Why can't she board it?
329
00:17:19,956 --> 00:17:21,790
First of all, Dude,
you don't have an ex.
330
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:25,043
Secondly, this is a fucking
show dog with fucking papers.
331
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:27,838
You can't board it. It gets upset.
Its hair falls out.
332
00:17:27,964 --> 00:17:30,257
Walter. ..
Fucking dog has fucking papers.
333
00:17:30,341 --> 00:17:33,009
Over the line!
Huh?
334
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:35,429
I'm sorry, Smokey.
You were over the line. That's a foul.
335
00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:37,180
Bullshit. Mark it eight, Dude.
336
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:40,392
Excuse me. Mark it zero.
Next frame.
337
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:43,395
Bullshit, Walter.
Mark it eight, Dude.
338
00:17:43,479 --> 00:17:46,064
Smokey, this is not Nam.
This is bowling. There are rules.
339
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:48,900
Hey, Walter, come on.
Hey, man, it's Smokey.
340
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:51,153
So his toe slipped over
a little, you know.
341
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:53,405
It's just a game, man.
This is a league game.
342
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,407
This determines who enters
the next round robin.
343
00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,242
344
00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:59,870
Am I wrong?
Yeah, but I wasn't over.
345
00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:02,664
Give me the marker, Dude.
I'm marking an eight.
346
00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:04,499
Smokey, my friend,
347
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:08,295
you're entering a world of pain.
Walter, man.
348
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:12,090
You mark that frame an eight,
you're entering a world of pain.
349
00:18:12,175 --> 00:18:14,760
I'm not. ..
A world of pain.
350
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:16,928
Look, Dude,
this is your partner.
351
00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:19,389
Has the whole world
gone crazy?
352
00:18:19,474 --> 00:18:22,225
Am I the only one around here who
gives a shit about the rules?
353
00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:23,560
Mark it zero!
354
00:18:23,644 --> 00:18:25,729
They're calling the cops, man.
Put the piece away.
355
00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:28,899
Mark it zero!
Walter, put the piece away.
356
00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:31,193
Walter. You think I'm
fucking around here?
357
00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:32,903
Mark it zero!
358
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,953
All right. It's fucking zero.
359
00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:44,122
You happy,
you crazy fuck?
360
00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:48,502
It's a league game,
Smokey.
361
00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:51,880
You can't do that, man.
362
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,674
These guys, you know, they're
like me, they're pacifists.
363
00:18:54,759 --> 00:18:57,344
Smokey was a
conscientious objector.
364
00:18:57,428 --> 00:19:00,263
You know, Dude, I myself dabbled
in pacifism at one point.
365
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:01,640
Not in Nam, of course.
366
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:05,185
And you know he's got
emotional problems, man.
367
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:07,687
You mean, beyond pacifism?
368
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:10,482
He's fragile.
He's very fragile.
369
00:19:13,236 --> 00:19:15,070
I did not know that.
370
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:18,031
Well, it's all water
under the bridge.
371
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:21,117
And we do enter
the next round robin.
372
00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:23,495
Am I wrong?
No, you're not wrong.
373
00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,330
Am I wrong?
You're not wrong, Walter.
374
00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:26,790
You're just an asshole.
375
00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:28,333
Okay then.
376
00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:30,043
Play Quintana and
O'Brien next week.
377
00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:32,045
They should be pushovers.
378
00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,674
Man, would you just. ..
379
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:37,509
Just take it easy, man.
380
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:39,886
You know, that's your answer
for everything, Dude.
381
00:19:39,971 --> 00:19:42,848
Let me point out something.
Pacifism is not. ..
382
00:19:42,932 --> 00:19:45,767
Look at our current situation
with that camel fucker in Iraq.
383
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:47,811
Pacifism is not something
to hide behind.
384
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,272
Just take it easy, man.
385
00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:52,732
I'm perfectly calm, Dude.
386
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:56,278
Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Calmer than you are.
387
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,280
Will you just take it easy?
388
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,907
Calmer than you are.
389
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:06,872
Dude, this is Smokey.
390
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,874
Look, I don't wanna be
a hard-on about this,
391
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:10,208
and l know
it wasn't your fault,
392
00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:11,877
but I just thought
it was fair to tell you
393
00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:14,170
that Gilbert and l will be
submitting this to the league
394
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,464
and asking them
to set aside the round.
395
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,217
I don't know,
maybe forfeit it to us.
396
00:20:19,302 --> 00:20:22,554
So, like l say, just thought,
you know, fair warning.
397
00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:24,097
Tell Walter.
398
00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:25,432
I'm sorry.
399
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:29,644
Mr. Lebowski,
this is Brandt at...
400
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:33,189
Well, at Mr. Lebowski's
office.
401
00:20:33,274 --> 00:20:35,775
Please call us
as soon as it's convenient.
402
00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:39,571
Mr. Lebowski,
this is Mel Zelnicker
403
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,114
of the Southern Cal
Bowling League.
404
00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:46,453
I just got an informal report that a
member of your team, a Walter Sobchak,
405
00:20:46,537 --> 00:20:48,788
drew a firearm
during league play.
406
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,457
If this is true, of course,
407
00:20:50,541 --> 00:20:52,250
it contravenes a number of
the league's bylaws
408
00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:54,044
and also article 27
of the league...
409
00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,797
Dude.
Hey, Marty.
410
00:20:57,882 --> 00:20:59,633
Dude, I finally got. ..
411
00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:02,010
I got the venue I wanted.
412
00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:06,014
I'm performing my dance
quintet, you know, my cycle,
413
00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:08,850
at Crane Jackson's Fountain
Street Theater on Tuesday night.
414
00:21:08,935 --> 00:21:13,188
And, well, I'd love it if
you came and gave me notes.
415
00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:15,732
I'll be there, man.
416
00:21:18,027 --> 00:21:20,904
Dude, tomorrow's
already the tenth.
417
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:23,531
Far out.
418
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,328
Oh. Oh, all right. Okay.
419
00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:31,206
Just slip the rent
under my door.
420
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:37,420
...serious infraction
and examine your standing.
421
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,005
Thank you.
422
00:21:40,591 --> 00:21:43,218
Mr. Lebowski, Brandt again.
423
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:46,721
Please do call us as soon as you
get in and I'll send the limo.
424
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:50,392
I hope you're not avoiding
this call because of the rug,
425
00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:53,144
which I assure you
is not a problem.
426
00:21:53,229 --> 00:21:55,855
We need your help, and...
427
00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:59,901
Well, we would very much like to see you.
Thank you. It's Brandt.
428
00:22:01,237 --> 00:22:02,696
We've had some
terrible news.
429
00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:04,990
Mr. Lebowski's in seclusion
in the west wing.
430
00:22:09,453 --> 00:22:10,954
Mr. Lebowski.
431
00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,212
Funny.
432
00:22:20,423 --> 00:22:24,217
I can look back on
a life of achievement,
433
00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:26,511
challenges met,
434
00:22:26,595 --> 00:22:28,638
competitors bested,
435
00:22:28,723 --> 00:22:30,432
obstacles overcome.
436
00:22:32,018 --> 00:22:35,395
I've accomplished
more than most men
437
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,772
and without
the use of my legs.
438
00:22:42,445 --> 00:22:45,238
What makes a man,
Mr. Lebowski?
439
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:47,949
Dude.
Huh?
440
00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:52,662
Oh, I don't know, sir.
441
00:22:52,747 --> 00:22:55,623
Is it being prepared
to do the right thing,
442
00:22:57,752 --> 00:22:59,419
whatever the cost?
443
00:23:00,254 --> 00:23:02,380
Isn't that what
makes a man?
444
00:23:03,507 --> 00:23:06,009
Sure, that and
a pair of testicles.
445
00:23:06,594 --> 00:23:08,386
You're joking,
446
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:12,265
but perhaps you're right.
447
00:23:12,349 --> 00:23:14,267
You mind if I do a Jay?
448
00:23:16,187 --> 00:23:17,353
Bunny.
449
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:20,774
Excuse me?
450
00:23:21,108 --> 00:23:22,650
Bunny Lebowski.
451
00:23:23,778 --> 00:23:25,904
She is the light of my life.
452
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:29,991
Are you surprised
at my tears, sir?
453
00:23:31,911 --> 00:23:33,787
Oh, fucking A.
454
00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:41,002
Strong men also cry.
455
00:23:44,048 --> 00:23:46,508
I received
this fax this morning.
456
00:23:49,470 --> 00:23:53,098
As you can see,
it is a ransom note.
457
00:23:54,058 --> 00:23:56,101
"We have Bunny."
458
00:23:56,185 --> 00:24:00,438
Written by men who were unable to
achieve on a level field of play.
459
00:24:00,523 --> 00:24:03,149
"Gather $1 million..."
460
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:06,653
Cowards! "...
in unmarked, nonconsecutive 20s."
461
00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,447
Weaklings!
"Await instructions."
462
00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:11,324
Bums!
"No funny stuff."
463
00:24:12,409 --> 00:24:14,577
Bummer.
Huh?
464
00:24:15,830 --> 00:24:19,541
This is a bummer, man.
That's. . . That's a bummer.
465
00:24:20,334 --> 00:24:23,044
Brandt will fill you in
on the details.
466
00:24:37,601 --> 00:24:42,355
Mr. Lebowski is prepared to make a
generous offer to you to act as courier
467
00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:44,983
once we get instructions
for the money.
468
00:24:45,067 --> 00:24:46,234
Why me, man?
469
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:51,823
He believes the culprits might be
the very people who soiled your rug
470
00:24:51,907 --> 00:24:56,828
and you are in a unique position to
confirm or disconfirm that suspicion.
471
00:24:56,912 --> 00:24:58,663
He thinks the carpet pissers
did this?
472
00:24:58,747 --> 00:25:00,665
Well, Dude,
we just don't know.
473
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:35,009
Welcome to the
Hotel California
474
00:26:35,886 --> 00:26:37,804
Such a lovely place
475
00:26:37,888 --> 00:26:39,764
Fucking Quintana.
476
00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:43,059
That creep can roll, man.
477
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:46,187
Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude.
Yeah.
478
00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:50,066
No, he's a sex offender
with a record.
479
00:26:50,150 --> 00:26:53,111
He did six months in Chino for
exposing himself to an eight-year-old.
480
00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:56,489
When he moved to Hollywood,
he had to go door-to-door
481
00:26:56,573 --> 00:26:58,366
to tell everyone
he was a pederast.
482
00:26:59,326 --> 00:27:02,829
What's a pederast, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
483
00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:07,750
So, how much
did he give you?
484
00:27:07,835 --> 00:27:11,087
20 grand, man. And, of course,
I still get to keep the rug.
485
00:27:11,213 --> 00:27:12,547
Just for making a hand-off?
Yeah.
486
00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:15,008
They gave Dude a beeper.
487
00:27:16,010 --> 00:27:18,803
So whenever these guys call. ..
What if it's during a game?
488
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:21,514
Oh, I told them if it was
during league play. ..
489
00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:22,724
What's during
league play?
490
00:27:22,808 --> 00:27:25,268
Life does not stop and
start at your convenience,
491
00:27:25,352 --> 00:27:27,270
you miserable
piece of shit.
492
00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:29,314
I figure. ..
What's wrong with Walter, Dude?
493
00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:31,899
I figure it's easy money, you know.
It's all pretty harmless.
494
00:27:31,984 --> 00:27:33,818
She probably
kidnapped herself.
495
00:27:34,778 --> 00:27:37,655
What do you mean, Dude?
Rug-peers did not do this.
496
00:27:37,740 --> 00:27:42,618
Look at it. A young trophy wife
marries this guy for his money.
497
00:27:42,703 --> 00:27:45,538
She figures he isn't giving
her enough, you know.
498
00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:47,373
She owes money
all over town.
499
00:27:47,458 --> 00:27:49,625
That fucking bitch!
500
00:27:49,710 --> 00:27:51,502
It's all a goddamn
fake, man.
501
00:27:51,587 --> 00:27:53,504
It's like Lenin said,
502
00:27:53,589 --> 00:27:58,551
you look for the person who
will benefit and, you know. ..
503
00:27:58,635 --> 00:28:01,262
I Am the Walrus?
You know, you'll. ..
504
00:28:01,930 --> 00:28:03,931
You know what I'm trying to say.
l Am the Walrus.
505
00:28:04,016 --> 00:28:06,809
That fucking bitch!
Oh, yeah!
506
00:28:06,894 --> 00:28:08,311
I Am the Walrus.
That's. ..
507
00:28:08,395 --> 00:28:09,896
Shut the fuck up,
Donny!
508
00:28:09,980 --> 00:28:13,024
V. I. Lenin, Vladimir
Ilyich Ulyanov!
509
00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:14,275
What the fuck is
he talking about?
510
00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:16,194
Fucking exactly what
happened to those. ..
511
00:28:16,278 --> 00:28:17,820
That makes me
fucking sick!
512
00:28:17,946 --> 00:28:20,865
Well, what do you care, Walter?
Those rich fucks.
513
00:28:20,949 --> 00:28:22,909
This whole fucking thing.
514
00:28:22,993 --> 00:28:25,745
I did not watch my buddies
die face down in the muck
515
00:28:25,829 --> 00:28:27,580
so that this
fucking strumpet,
516
00:28:27,664 --> 00:28:28,831
this fucking whore,
could waltz around. ..
517
00:28:28,916 --> 00:28:31,334
I don't see any connection
with Vietnam, man.
518
00:28:31,418 --> 00:28:33,044
Well, there isn't a
literal connection, Dude.
519
00:28:33,128 --> 00:28:35,046
No, Walter, face it,
there isn't any connection.
520
00:28:35,130 --> 00:28:36,589
Your roll.
Have it your way.
521
00:28:36,673 --> 00:28:38,007
Your roll.
But my point is. ..
522
00:28:38,133 --> 00:28:40,885
My point is. ..
Are you ready to be fucked, man?
523
00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:45,348
I see you rolled your way
into the semis.
524
00:28:46,392 --> 00:28:48,726
Dios mío, man.
525
00:28:48,811 --> 00:28:51,646
Liam and me,
we're gonna fuck you up.
526
00:28:52,147 --> 00:28:57,944
Yeah? Well, you know, that's
just like your opinion, man.
527
00:28:59,154 --> 00:29:02,240
Let me tell you
something, pendejo.
528
00:29:02,324 --> 00:29:04,534
You pull any of your
crazy shit with us,
529
00:29:04,618 --> 00:29:07,412
you flash a piece out
on the lanes,
530
00:29:07,496 --> 00:29:10,415
I'll take it away from you
and stick it up your ass
531
00:29:10,499 --> 00:29:13,709
and pull the fucking trigger
till it goes click.
532
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:16,921
Jesus.
533
00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:18,673
You said it, man.
534
00:29:18,757 --> 00:29:21,008
Nobody fucks with the Jesus.
535
00:29:27,307 --> 00:29:28,683
Eight-year-olds, Dude.
536
00:29:51,874 --> 00:29:55,042
La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
537
00:29:55,419 --> 00:30:01,841
La-la-la, la, la, la, la
538
00:30:02,176 --> 00:30:03,926
La-la, la-la
539
00:30:06,096 --> 00:30:07,722
La-la-la
540
00:30:08,974 --> 00:30:11,017
La-la-la, la-la-la
541
00:30:11,101 --> 00:30:12,477
La-la, la-la
542
00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:17,648
The man in me will do
543
00:30:18,734 --> 00:30:21,235
Nearly any task
544
00:30:22,070 --> 00:30:25,156
And as for compensation
545
00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:27,325
There's little he would ask
546
00:30:28,911 --> 00:30:31,496
Take a woman like you
547
00:30:32,289 --> 00:30:33,706
To get through
548
00:30:34,166 --> 00:30:36,250
To the man in me
549
00:30:39,296 --> 00:30:42,423
Storm clouds are raging
550
00:30:42,925 --> 00:30:45,468
All around my door
551
00:30:46,553 --> 00:30:48,429
I think to myself
552
00:30:48,514 --> 00:30:51,974
I might not take it anymore
553
00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:55,686
Take a woman like your kind
554
00:30:56,104 --> 00:31:00,149
To find the man in me
555
00:31:02,903 --> 00:31:04,612
But, oh
556
00:31:05,864 --> 00:31:07,782
What a wonderful feeling
557
00:31:10,410 --> 00:31:12,203
Just to know
558
00:31:12,287 --> 00:31:14,747
That you are near
559
00:31:17,709 --> 00:31:21,128
Sets my heart a-reeling
560
00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:25,383
From my toes
561
00:31:25,926 --> 00:31:28,970
Up to my ears
562
00:31:29,846 --> 00:31:33,099
The man in me
will hide sometimes
563
00:31:33,183 --> 00:31:34,684
They called
about 80 minutes ago.
564
00:31:34,768 --> 00:31:37,395
They want you to take the money,
drive north on the 405.
565
00:31:37,479 --> 00:31:38,813
They will call you
on the portable phone
566
00:31:38,897 --> 00:31:40,982
with instructions
in about 40 minutes.
567
00:31:41,066 --> 00:31:42,149
One person only.
568
00:31:42,234 --> 00:31:44,652
They were very clear on that, or
I'd go with you. One person only.
569
00:31:44,778 --> 00:31:47,780
What happened to your jaw?
Oh, nothing, man.
570
00:31:49,324 --> 00:31:50,950
Here's the money.
571
00:31:51,785 --> 00:31:53,411
And the phone.
572
00:31:53,495 --> 00:31:56,330
Please, Dude, follow whatever
instructions they give.
573
00:31:56,415 --> 00:31:59,208
All right.
Her life is in your hands.
574
00:31:59,293 --> 00:32:00,918
Man, don't say that.
575
00:32:01,003 --> 00:32:03,588
Mr. Lebowski asked me to repeat
that, her life is in your hands.
576
00:32:03,672 --> 00:32:05,006
Oh, shit, man.
577
00:32:05,090 --> 00:32:07,425
Her life is in
your hands, Dude.
578
00:32:07,509 --> 00:32:10,177
Report back to us
as soon as it's done.
579
00:32:19,688 --> 00:32:23,941
Where the fuck are you going, man?
Take the ringer, I'll drive.
580
00:32:24,026 --> 00:32:26,235
The what?
The ringer.
581
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:27,945
The ringer, Dude.
582
00:32:35,704 --> 00:32:37,663
What the. ..
Have they called yet?
583
00:32:37,748 --> 00:32:39,540
What the hell is this?
584
00:32:39,625 --> 00:32:42,501
My dirty undies, Dude.
The laundry. The whites.
585
00:32:42,586 --> 00:32:46,714
Walter, I'm sure there's a reason
you brought your dirty undies, man.
586
00:32:46,798 --> 00:32:48,090
That's right, Dude.
The weight.
587
00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:49,467
The ringer cannot look empty.
588
00:32:49,551 --> 00:32:51,636
Walter, what the fuck
are you thinking, man?
589
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,638
You're right, Dude.
I got to thinking.
590
00:32:53,722 --> 00:32:56,557
I got to thinking, why should we settle
for a measly fucking 20 grand. ..
591
00:32:56,642 --> 00:32:59,852
We? What the fuck, "we"?
You said you just wanted to come along.
592
00:32:59,936 --> 00:33:02,313
My point, Dude, is why should
we settle for 20 grand
593
00:33:02,397 --> 00:33:05,066
when we can keep the entire million?
Am I wrong?
594
00:33:05,150 --> 00:33:08,235
Yes, you're wrong. This
isn't a fucking game, man.
595
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:10,655
Oh, but it is a game.
You said so yourself.
596
00:33:10,739 --> 00:33:12,948
She kidnapped herself.
I said I thought. ..
597
00:33:19,206 --> 00:33:21,248
Dude, here.
Who is this?
598
00:33:22,668 --> 00:33:25,628
Dude. The bagman, man.
Where do you want us to go?
599
00:33:25,712 --> 00:33:26,754
Us?
600
00:33:28,382 --> 00:33:29,465
Shit!
601
00:33:31,385 --> 00:33:34,011
Yeah, you know,
me and the driver.
602
00:33:34,096 --> 00:33:37,848
I'm not handling the money, driving the car
and talking on the phone all by my. ..
603
00:33:37,933 --> 00:33:39,183
Shut the fuck up!
604
00:33:39,267 --> 00:33:42,269
Dude, are you fucking this up?
Who is that?
605
00:33:43,605 --> 00:33:46,190
That is the driver.
I told you. ..
606
00:33:47,943 --> 00:33:49,860
Oh, shit!
What the fuck's going on?
607
00:33:49,945 --> 00:33:51,320
Walter. ..
What the fuck is going on?
608
00:33:51,405 --> 00:33:55,700
He hung up, man. You fucked it up.
You fucked it up!
609
00:33:55,826 --> 00:33:58,369
Her life was in our hands, man.
Easy, Dude.
610
00:33:58,453 --> 00:34:02,331
We're screwed now. We don't get shit.
They're gonna kill her.
611
00:34:02,416 --> 00:34:05,126
We're fucked, Walter.
Nothing is fucked, Dude.
612
00:34:05,210 --> 00:34:07,712
Come on.
You're being very un-Dude.
613
00:34:07,796 --> 00:34:10,214
They'll call back.
Look, she kidnapped. ..
614
00:34:11,425 --> 00:34:13,384
You see? Nothing's
fucked here, Dude.
615
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:17,346
Nothing is fucked.
They're a bunch of fucking amateurs.
616
00:34:17,431 --> 00:34:19,932
Walter, will you just
shut the fuck up?
617
00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:22,393
Don't say peep while
I'm doing business here, man.
618
00:34:22,477 --> 00:34:24,437
Okay, Dude.
Have it your way.
619
00:34:26,523 --> 00:34:28,983
But they're amateurs.
Fuck.
620
00:34:30,569 --> 00:34:31,736
Dude.
621
00:34:31,820 --> 00:34:35,072
Okay, we proceed but only
if there is no funny stuff.
622
00:34:35,157 --> 00:34:36,699
Yeah, yeah.
623
00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:38,868
So no funny stuff. Okay?
624
00:34:38,952 --> 00:34:41,537
Just tell me where the fuck
you want us to go.
625
00:34:45,167 --> 00:34:47,376
That was the sign, man.
626
00:34:47,461 --> 00:34:51,172
So, all we gotta do
is get her back.
627
00:34:51,256 --> 00:34:53,632
No one's in a position
to complain.
628
00:34:53,717 --> 00:34:56,135
We keep the baksheesh.
Yeah, terrific, Walter.
629
00:34:56,219 --> 00:34:58,888
But you haven't told me how we're
gonna get her back. Where is she?
630
00:34:58,972 --> 00:35:00,806
That's the simple part, Dude.
631
00:35:00,891 --> 00:35:05,186
We make the hand-off, I grab one of
them and beat it out of him. Huh?
632
00:35:06,313 --> 00:35:08,939
That's a great plan, Walter.
633
00:35:09,024 --> 00:35:11,150
That's fucking ingenious,
if I understand it correctly.
634
00:35:11,234 --> 00:35:13,194
It's a Swiss fucking watch.
635
00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:16,405
That's right, Dude.
The beauty of this is its simplicity.
636
00:35:16,490 --> 00:35:19,742
Once a plan gets too complex,
everything can go wrong.
637
00:35:19,826 --> 00:35:21,577
If there's one thing
I learned in Nam. ..
638
00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:26,624
Dude.
639
00:35:26,708 --> 00:35:28,542
You are coming
to wooden bridge.
640
00:35:28,627 --> 00:35:29,794
When you cross the bridge,
641
00:35:29,878 --> 00:35:33,172
you throw the bag from the
left window of the moving car.
642
00:35:33,256 --> 00:35:34,298
You're being watched.
643
00:35:35,634 --> 00:35:37,968
Fuck. What'd he say?
Where's the hand-off?
644
00:35:38,053 --> 00:35:39,720
There is no fucking
hand-off, man.
645
00:35:39,805 --> 00:35:42,473
At the wooden bridge we throw
the money out of the car.
646
00:35:42,557 --> 00:35:45,392
We throw the money
out of the moving car.
647
00:35:45,936 --> 00:35:48,604
We can't do that, Dude.
That fucks up our plan.
648
00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:50,606
Well, call them up and
explain it to them, Walter.
649
00:35:50,690 --> 00:35:51,941
Your plan is so
fucking simple,
650
00:35:52,025 --> 00:35:53,818
I'm sure they'll
fucking understand it.
651
00:35:53,902 --> 00:35:55,027
That's the beauty of it.
652
00:35:55,153 --> 00:35:57,530
Wooden bridge, huh?
Throw them the money, Walter.
653
00:35:57,614 --> 00:35:59,156
We're not fucking around, man.
654
00:35:59,241 --> 00:36:01,492
Okay, Dude, the bridge is coming up.
Give me the ringer, chop-chop.
655
00:36:01,576 --> 00:36:03,118
Fuck that.
Walter, I love you,
656
00:36:03,203 --> 00:36:06,288
but sooner or later you're gonna have to
face the fact you're a goddamn moron.
657
00:36:06,373 --> 00:36:08,707
Okay, Dude. No time to argue.
Hey, man!
658
00:36:08,792 --> 00:36:11,168
Here's the bridge.
Hey, Walter! Hey, Walter!
659
00:36:11,253 --> 00:36:13,963
Hey, Walter!
Here goes the ringer!
660
00:36:15,257 --> 00:36:17,466
What the fuck?
Okay, Dude, you're wheel.
661
00:36:17,551 --> 00:36:19,718
Hey, man, what the fuck?
At 1 5 mph, I roll out.
662
00:36:19,803 --> 00:36:21,720
I double back, grab one of
them and beat it out of him.
663
00:36:21,805 --> 00:36:23,013
The Uzi.
Uzi.
664
00:36:23,098 --> 00:36:25,182
You didn't think I was rolling
out of here naked, did you?
665
00:36:25,267 --> 00:36:27,893
Walter, please! Fifteen, Dude!
This is it! Let's take that hill!
666
00:36:27,978 --> 00:36:29,270
Walter!
667
00:36:52,085 --> 00:36:54,085
We have it!
668
00:37:13,982 --> 00:37:15,983
Fuck it, Dude.
669
00:37:16,067 --> 00:37:17,651
Let's go bowling.
670
00:37:56,149 --> 00:37:59,443
Aitz chaim he, Dude,
as the ex used to say.
671
00:37:59,527 --> 00:38:01,320
What the fuck is that
supposed to mean?
672
00:38:01,404 --> 00:38:04,490
What the fuck are we
gonna tell Lebowski?
673
00:38:04,574 --> 00:38:06,700
Oh, him.
674
00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:09,787
I don't know.
What exactly is the problem?
675
00:38:09,871 --> 00:38:11,705
The problem is. ..
676
00:38:12,999 --> 00:38:14,750
What do you mean,
what's the. ..
677
00:38:14,834 --> 00:38:16,377
There was no. ..
678
00:38:17,212 --> 00:38:18,796
We didn't. ..
679
00:38:19,881 --> 00:38:22,091
They're gonna kill
that poor woman, man!
680
00:38:22,175 --> 00:38:24,009
What the fuck
are you talking about?
681
00:38:24,094 --> 00:38:26,637
The poor woman, that poor
slut kidnapped herself.
682
00:38:26,721 --> 00:38:28,013
Come on, Dude.
You said so yourself.
683
00:38:28,098 --> 00:38:30,391
Man, I said I thought
she kidnapped herself.
684
00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:31,976
You're the one who's
so fucking certain.
685
00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:34,603
That's right, Dude.
1 00% certain.
686
00:38:34,688 --> 00:38:36,397
They posted the next round
for the tournament.
687
00:38:36,481 --> 00:38:37,731
Donny, shut the fuck. ..
688
00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:39,817
When do we play?
This Saturday. Quintana and. ..
689
00:38:39,901 --> 00:38:41,652
Saturday? Well, they'll
have to reschedule.
690
00:38:41,736 --> 00:38:44,071
Walter, what am I
gonna tell Lebowski?
691
00:38:44,155 --> 00:38:47,491
I told that fuck down at the league office.
Who's in charge of scheduling?
692
00:38:47,575 --> 00:38:49,118
Walter!
Burkhalter.
693
00:38:49,202 --> 00:38:52,162
I told that kraut a fucking thousand
times, I don't roll on shabbos!
694
00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:53,539
Walter!
They already posted it.
695
00:38:53,623 --> 00:38:55,207
Well, they can
fucking un-post it!
696
00:38:55,291 --> 00:38:58,585
Who gives a shit?
They're gonna kill that poor woman, man!
697
00:38:58,712 --> 00:39:00,963
What am I gonna tell Lebowski?
Come on, Dude.
698
00:39:01,047 --> 00:39:04,049
Eventually she'll get tired of her little
game and, you know, wander on back.
699
00:39:04,134 --> 00:39:05,676
How come you don't roll
on Saturday, Walter?
700
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:06,885
I'm shomer shabbos.
701
00:39:07,012 --> 00:39:08,929
What's that, Walter?
Yeah, and in the meantime,
702
00:39:09,014 --> 00:39:10,431
what do I tell Lebowski?
703
00:39:10,515 --> 00:39:12,850
Saturday, Donny, is shabbos,
the Jewish day of rest.
704
00:39:12,934 --> 00:39:15,394
That means I don't work,
I don't drive a car,
705
00:39:15,478 --> 00:39:16,979
I don't fucking
ride in a car,
706
00:39:17,063 --> 00:39:18,897
I don't handle money,
I don't turn on the oven
707
00:39:18,982 --> 00:39:21,108
and I sure as shit
don't fucking roll!
708
00:39:22,027 --> 00:39:23,110
Sheesh.
709
00:39:23,194 --> 00:39:24,737
Shomer shabbos!
710
00:39:26,656 --> 00:39:29,324
Walter, how am I gonna. ..
Shomer fucking shabbos!
711
00:39:29,451 --> 00:39:32,703
Oh, fuck! That's it. I'm out of here.
Oh, come on, Dude.
712
00:39:34,748 --> 00:39:36,623
Dude! Dude!
713
00:39:38,877 --> 00:39:40,210
You just tell him. ..
714
00:39:40,295 --> 00:39:42,671
Tell him we made the drop and
everything went, you know. ..
715
00:39:42,756 --> 00:39:43,797
Oh, yeah.
How'd it go?
716
00:39:43,882 --> 00:39:45,758
Went all right.
Dude's car got a little dinged up.
717
00:39:45,842 --> 00:39:48,218
Walter, we didn't make
the fucking hand-off, man!
718
00:39:48,303 --> 00:39:50,387
They didn't get
the fucking money!
719
00:39:50,472 --> 00:39:51,680
And they're gonna. ..
They're gonna. ..
720
00:39:51,765 --> 00:39:53,348
They're gonna kill
that poor woman.
721
00:39:53,433 --> 00:39:56,101
They're gonna kill
that poor woman!
722
00:39:56,186 --> 00:39:57,644
Walter, if you can't
ride in a car,
723
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,104
then how do you get
around on shabbos?
724
00:39:59,189 --> 00:40:01,231
Really, Dude,
you surprise me.
725
00:40:01,316 --> 00:40:02,608
They're not gonna
kill shit.
726
00:40:02,692 --> 00:40:03,817
They're not gonna do shit.
727
00:40:03,902 --> 00:40:05,527
What can they do to her?
Bunch of fucking amateurs.
728
00:40:05,612 --> 00:40:07,446
And meanwhile,
look at the bottom line.
729
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:09,782
Who's sitting on a million
fucking dollars?
730
00:40:09,866 --> 00:40:10,991
Am I wrong?
Walter.
731
00:40:11,076 --> 00:40:14,119
Who's got a fucking million fucking
dollars sitting in the trunk of our car?
732
00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:17,247
Our car, Walter? And what do they got?
My dirty undies.
733
00:40:17,332 --> 00:40:18,999
My fucking whites!
734
00:40:25,090 --> 00:40:26,423
Say, Dude?
735
00:40:27,300 --> 00:40:29,218
Where is your car?
736
00:40:29,344 --> 00:40:32,471
Who's got your undies, Walter?
Where's your car, Dude?
737
00:40:32,555 --> 00:40:34,681
You don't know,
Walter?
738
00:40:35,391 --> 00:40:39,061
It was parked in a handicap zone.
Perhaps they towed it.
739
00:40:39,979 --> 00:40:42,689
You fucking know
it's been stolen.
740
00:40:42,774 --> 00:40:45,692
Well, certainly that's
a possibility, Dude.
741
00:40:47,070 --> 00:40:48,487
Oh, fuck it.
742
00:40:51,032 --> 00:40:54,451
Where you going, Dude?
I'm going home, Donny.
743
00:40:54,536 --> 00:40:57,704
Phone's ringing, Dude.
Thank you, Donny!
744
00:41:13,388 --> 00:41:14,513
Yeah.
745
00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:21,019
Green with some brown,
rust coloration.
746
00:41:22,230 --> 00:41:25,357
And was there anything
of value in the car?
747
00:41:25,441 --> 00:41:26,900
Oh, yeah.
748
00:41:28,278 --> 00:41:32,614
A tape deck, some Creedence
tapes, and there was a. ..
749
00:41:35,201 --> 00:41:36,743
My briefcase.
750
00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:40,956
In the briefcase?
751
00:41:43,084 --> 00:41:44,251
Papers.
752
00:41:45,170 --> 00:41:46,587
Just papers.
753
00:41:47,589 --> 00:41:50,966
You know, my papers,
business papers.
754
00:41:52,635 --> 00:41:55,971
And what do you do, sir?
I'm unemployed.
755
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:02,269
My rug was also stolen.
756
00:42:02,353 --> 00:42:04,646
Your rug was in the car?
757
00:42:04,731 --> 00:42:06,440
No. Here.
758
00:42:07,108 --> 00:42:08,775
Separate incidents.
759
00:42:10,778 --> 00:42:12,529
The Dude is not in.
760
00:42:12,614 --> 00:42:15,449
Do you find them much,
these stolen cars?
761
00:42:16,534 --> 00:42:17,868
Sometimes.
762
00:42:18,703 --> 00:42:21,163
Wouldn't hold out much hope
for the tape deck though.
763
00:42:21,247 --> 00:42:22,956
Or the Creedence.
764
00:42:23,124 --> 00:42:27,085
What about the briefcase?
765
00:42:27,629 --> 00:42:29,046
Mr. Lebowski,
I'd like to see you.
766
00:42:29,130 --> 00:42:31,048
Call when you get home
and I'll send a car for you.
767
00:42:31,132 --> 00:42:34,760
My name is Maude Lebowski.
I'm the one who took your rug.
768
00:42:34,844 --> 00:42:37,930
Well, guess we can close
the file on that one.
769
00:43:29,524 --> 00:43:32,442
I'll be with you in
a moment, Mr. Lebowski.
770
00:43:50,962 --> 00:43:54,381
Does the female form make you
uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski?
771
00:43:54,465 --> 00:43:58,260
Is that what this is a picture of?
In a sense, yes.
772
00:43:58,344 --> 00:44:01,013
My art has been commended
as being strongly vaginal,
773
00:44:01,097 --> 00:44:02,180
which bothers some men.
774
00:44:02,265 --> 00:44:05,225
The word itself makes
some men uncomfortable.
775
00:44:05,727 --> 00:44:07,811
Vagina.
Oh, yeah?
776
00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:10,314
Yes, they don't like hearing it
and find it difficult to say,
777
00:44:10,398 --> 00:44:11,773
whereas without
batting an eye,
778
00:44:11,858 --> 00:44:16,069
a man will refer to his dick,
or his rod or his johnson.
779
00:44:17,322 --> 00:44:18,322
"Johnson"?
780
00:44:18,406 --> 00:44:21,116
All right, Mr. Lebowski,
let's get down to cases.
781
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:23,660
My father told me he agreed
to let you have the rug,
782
00:44:23,745 --> 00:44:27,706
but as it was a gift from me to my
late mother, it was not his to give.
783
00:44:27,790 --> 00:44:29,708
Now, your face.
784
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:32,878
As for this kidnapping.
785
00:44:33,004 --> 00:44:34,004
Huh?
786
00:44:34,088 --> 00:44:37,507
Yes, I know all about it, and I
know that you acted as courier.
787
00:44:37,592 --> 00:44:40,844
Let me tell you something.
The whole thing stinks to high heaven.
788
00:44:40,928 --> 00:44:45,140
Yeah, right, but let me explain
something about the rug.
789
00:44:45,224 --> 00:44:47,434
Do you like sex,
Mr. Lebowski?
790
00:44:48,436 --> 00:44:51,688
Excuse me? Sex, the physical
act of love. Coitus.
791
00:44:51,814 --> 00:44:55,025
Do you like it?
I was talking about my rug.
792
00:44:55,109 --> 00:44:57,652
You're not interested in sex?
793
00:44:57,737 --> 00:45:00,030
You mean coitus?
I like it, too.
794
00:45:00,114 --> 00:45:02,366
It's a male myth about
feminists that we hate sex.
795
00:45:02,450 --> 00:45:04,868
It can be a natural,
zesty enterprise.
796
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:06,370
However, there are
some people,
797
00:45:06,454 --> 00:45:09,373
it is called satyriasis in
men, nymphomania in women,
798
00:45:09,457 --> 00:45:12,626
who engage in it compulsively
and without joy.
799
00:45:12,710 --> 00:45:15,712
Oh, no.
Oh, yes, Mr. Lebowski.
800
00:45:15,797 --> 00:45:19,716
These unfortunate souls cannot love,
in the true sense of the word.
801
00:45:19,801 --> 00:45:23,261
Our mutual acquaintance,
Bunny, is one of these.
802
00:45:23,346 --> 00:45:25,555
Listen, Maude,
803
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:28,850
I'm sorry if your stepmother
is a nympho,
804
00:45:28,935 --> 00:45:32,312
but, you know, I don't see
what this has to do with. ..
805
00:45:32,397 --> 00:45:35,190
You have any Kahlua?
Take a look at this, sir.
806
00:45:38,736 --> 00:45:40,570
Oh, I know that guy.
807
00:45:42,156 --> 00:45:44,366
He's a nihilist.
808
00:45:45,952 --> 00:45:47,661
"Karl Hungus."
809
00:46:01,426 --> 00:46:02,843
Hi.
Hello.
810
00:46:02,927 --> 00:46:05,887
Mein dispatcher says there is
something wrong with dein Kabel.
811
00:46:05,972 --> 00:46:07,097
Yeah. Come on in.
812
00:46:07,181 --> 00:46:09,599
I'm not really sure exactly what's
really wrong with the cable.
813
00:46:09,684 --> 00:46:12,269
That's why they sent me.
I am an expert.
814
00:46:12,353 --> 00:46:13,687
The TV's in here.
815
00:46:13,729 --> 00:46:16,940
You recognize her, of course.
Helga, bring my tools.
816
00:46:19,861 --> 00:46:21,611
That's my friend Sherry.
817
00:46:21,696 --> 00:46:23,363
She just came over
to use the shower.
818
00:46:23,448 --> 00:46:25,782
The story is ludicrous.
819
00:46:25,867 --> 00:46:28,827
My name is Karl.
Ich bin expert.
820
00:46:28,911 --> 00:46:30,954
You must be here
to fix the cable.
821
00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:33,915
Lord, you can imagine
where it goes from here.
822
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,459
He fixes the cable?
823
00:46:35,543 --> 00:46:37,586
Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.
824
00:46:37,670 --> 00:46:40,964
Little matter to me that this woman chose
to pursue a career in pornography,
825
00:46:41,048 --> 00:46:43,675
nor that she has been
banging Jackie Treehorn,
826
00:46:43,759 --> 00:46:45,510
to use the parlance
of our times.
827
00:46:45,595 --> 00:46:49,556
However, I am one of the two
trustees of the Lebowski Foundation,
828
00:46:49,640 --> 00:46:51,308
the other being my father.
829
00:46:51,392 --> 00:46:53,351
The foundation takes
youngsters from Watts and. ..
830
00:46:53,436 --> 00:46:54,811
Shit, yeah. The achievers.
831
00:46:54,896 --> 00:46:58,607
Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, yes,
and proud we are of all of them.
832
00:46:58,691 --> 00:47:02,527
I asked my father about his withdrawal of
$1 million from the foundation account,
833
00:47:02,612 --> 00:47:04,446
and he told me
about this abduction,
834
00:47:04,530 --> 00:47:06,156
but I tell you
it is preposterous.
835
00:47:06,240 --> 00:47:10,160
This compulsive fornicator is taking
my father for the proverbial ride.
836
00:47:10,244 --> 00:47:12,162
Yeah, but my. ..
I'm getting to your rug.
837
00:47:12,246 --> 00:47:13,997
My father and I
don't get along.
838
00:47:14,081 --> 00:47:15,707
He doesn't approve
of my lifestyle and,
839
00:47:15,791 --> 00:47:17,459
needless to say,
I don't approve of his.
840
00:47:17,543 --> 00:47:21,338
However, I hardly wish to make my
father's embezzlement a police matter.
841
00:47:21,422 --> 00:47:24,299
So I'm proposing that you
try to recover the money
842
00:47:24,383 --> 00:47:26,510
from the people
you delivered it to.
843
00:47:26,594 --> 00:47:29,513
Well, I could do that.
844
00:47:29,597 --> 00:47:31,473
If you successfully do so,
845
00:47:31,557 --> 00:47:36,811
I will compensate you to the tune
of 1 0% of the recovered sum.
846
00:47:36,896 --> 00:47:38,897
A hundred. ..
Thousand. Yes.
847
00:47:38,981 --> 00:47:41,733
Bones or clams or
whatever you call them.
848
00:47:41,817 --> 00:47:46,071
Yeah, but what about my. ..
Your rug, yes.
849
00:47:46,155 --> 00:47:48,740
Well, with that money you
can buy any number of rugs
850
00:47:48,824 --> 00:47:51,451
that don't have sentimental
value for me.
851
00:47:51,536 --> 00:47:54,037
And I am sorry about
that crack on the jaw.
852
00:47:54,121 --> 00:47:56,581
Oh, that's fine.
That doesn't even. ..
853
00:47:56,666 --> 00:47:59,209
Here's the name and number of a
doctor who will look at it for you.
854
00:47:59,293 --> 00:48:00,877
You will receive no bill.
855
00:48:00,962 --> 00:48:02,546
He's a good man
and thorough.
856
00:48:02,630 --> 00:48:04,214
That's thoughtful but. ..
857
00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:07,801
Please see him, Jeffrey.
He's a good man and thorough.
858
00:48:09,428 --> 00:48:11,596
Oh, well, all right.
859
00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:14,266
So he says, "My wife's
a pain in the ass.
860
00:48:14,350 --> 00:48:16,768
"She's always busting
my frigging agates.
861
00:48:16,852 --> 00:48:20,063
"My daughter's married
to a loser bastard.
862
00:48:20,147 --> 00:48:23,984
"I got a rash so bad on my
ass I can't even sit down.
863
00:48:24,110 --> 00:48:26,319
"But you know me,
I can't complain."
864
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:30,991
I got a rash, man. Fucking A.
865
00:48:32,034 --> 00:48:34,578
I gotta tell you, Tone, man,
866
00:48:34,662 --> 00:48:37,789
earlier today I was really
feeling shitty, man.
867
00:48:37,873 --> 00:48:39,791
Really down in the dumps.
868
00:48:39,875 --> 00:48:41,251
Lost a little money. ..
869
00:48:41,335 --> 00:48:44,754
Hey, you know what? Forget about it, huh?
Forget about it.
870
00:48:44,839 --> 00:48:46,089
Yeah, fuck it, man.
871
00:48:46,173 --> 00:48:49,009
You can't be worried about that shit.
Life goes on, man.
872
00:48:49,093 --> 00:48:51,803
Well, home, sweet home,
Mr. L.
873
00:48:54,515 --> 00:48:56,808
Hey, yo. Come here.
874
00:48:56,892 --> 00:48:59,394
Who's your friend in
the Volkswagen? Huh?
875
00:49:01,272 --> 00:49:03,481
Yeah.
He followed us here.
876
00:49:03,566 --> 00:49:06,484
When did he start. ..
Whoa! What the fuck?
877
00:49:06,569 --> 00:49:08,695
Get in the limo, you son of a bitch!
No arguments!
878
00:49:08,779 --> 00:49:11,656
Hey! Hey! Careful, man!
There's a beverage here!
879
00:49:13,326 --> 00:49:15,785
Start talking, and talk
fast, you lousy bum.
880
00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:17,704
We've been frantically
trying to reach you, Dude.
881
00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:20,332
Where is my goddamn money,
you bum?
882
00:49:21,876 --> 00:49:24,586
Well, we. . . I don't. ..
883
00:49:24,670 --> 00:49:26,963
They did not receive
the money, you nitwit!
884
00:49:27,048 --> 00:49:28,632
They did not
receive the money!
885
00:49:28,716 --> 00:49:31,009
Her life was
in your hands!
886
00:49:31,093 --> 00:49:32,636
This is our concern, Dude.
887
00:49:32,720 --> 00:49:34,763
No, man.
Nothing is fucked here.
888
00:49:34,847 --> 00:49:36,765
Nothing is fucked?
No, man.
889
00:49:36,849 --> 00:49:40,644
The goddamn plane has
crashed into the mountain!
890
00:49:40,728 --> 00:49:44,981
Man, come on. Who are you gonna
believe, those guys or. ..
891
00:49:45,066 --> 00:49:46,816
We dropped off the damn money.
892
00:49:46,901 --> 00:49:48,193
We?
893
00:49:49,487 --> 00:49:52,489
I, the royal we.
894
00:49:52,573 --> 00:49:53,907
You know. The editorial. ..
895
00:49:53,991 --> 00:49:56,034
I dropped off the money
exactly as per. ..
896
00:49:56,118 --> 00:49:59,871
Look, man, I've got certain information.
All right?
897
00:49:59,955 --> 00:50:02,457
Certain things have
come to light and. ..
898
00:50:02,541 --> 00:50:05,168
You know, has it ever
occurred to you
899
00:50:05,252 --> 00:50:10,674
that instead of, you know,
running around, blaming me. ..
900
00:50:10,758 --> 00:50:12,967
You know, given the nature
of all this new shit,
901
00:50:13,052 --> 00:50:18,890
you know, this could be
a lot more complex. ..
902
00:50:18,974 --> 00:50:23,937
I mean, it's not just. ..
It might not be just such a simple. . . You know?
903
00:50:24,021 --> 00:50:27,524
What in God's holy name
are you blathering about?
904
00:50:27,608 --> 00:50:29,984
Well, I'll tell you what
I'm blathering about.
905
00:50:30,069 --> 00:50:32,028
I've got information, man.
906
00:50:32,113 --> 00:50:33,863
New shit has come to light.
907
00:50:33,948 --> 00:50:35,907
And, shit, man,
908
00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:39,786
she kidnapped herself.
909
00:50:42,790 --> 00:50:45,542
Well, sure, man.
Look at it. You know?
910
00:50:45,626 --> 00:50:49,546
A young trophy wife, in the
parlance of our times, you know.
911
00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:54,801
She owes money all over town,
including to known pornographers.
912
00:50:56,721 --> 00:50:58,972
And that's cool.
That's cool.
913
00:50:59,849 --> 00:51:03,685
I'm saying she
needs money, man.
914
00:51:03,769 --> 00:51:07,439
And, you know, of course they're
gonna say they didn't get it
915
00:51:08,733 --> 00:51:11,568
because she wants more, man.
916
00:51:11,652 --> 00:51:14,070
She's gotta feed the monkey.
I mean. ..
917
00:51:16,407 --> 00:51:19,492
Hasn't that ever
occurred to you, man?
918
00:51:19,577 --> 00:51:20,660
Sir?
919
00:51:22,830 --> 00:51:26,207
No, Mr. Lebowski, it had
not occurred to me.
920
00:51:26,292 --> 00:51:28,501
That had not
occurred to us, Dude.
921
00:51:28,586 --> 00:51:30,044
Well, okay, you know?
922
00:51:30,129 --> 00:51:34,632
You guys aren't privy to all
the new shit, so, you know. ..
923
00:51:34,717 --> 00:51:38,094
But, hey, that's what you. ..
That's what you pay me for.
924
00:51:40,514 --> 00:51:41,639
Speaking of which,
925
00:51:41,724 --> 00:51:46,060
do you think that you could
give me my $20,000 in cash?
926
00:51:46,145 --> 00:51:49,105
My concern is, and I've gotta
check it with my accountant,
927
00:51:49,190 --> 00:51:51,941
that this might bump me up
into a higher tax. ..
928
00:51:52,026 --> 00:51:54,611
Brandt, give him
the envelope.
929
00:51:55,321 --> 00:51:59,282
Oh, well, if you've already got
the check made out, that's cool.
930
00:51:59,366 --> 00:52:01,367
We received this
this morning.
931
00:52:03,913 --> 00:52:07,290
Since you have
failed to achieve,
932
00:52:07,374 --> 00:52:10,877
even in the modest task
which was your charge,
933
00:52:10,961 --> 00:52:14,130
since you have
stolen my money,
934
00:52:14,215 --> 00:52:17,926
since you have unrepentantly
betrayed my trust,
935
00:52:18,010 --> 00:52:21,971
I have no choice
but to tell these bums
936
00:52:22,056 --> 00:52:24,265
to do whatever is necessary
937
00:52:24,350 --> 00:52:28,478
to recover their money
from you, Jeffrey Lebowski.
938
00:52:29,730 --> 00:52:33,817
And with Brandt as my witness,
I will tell you this,
939
00:52:33,901 --> 00:52:37,153
any further harm
visited upon Bunny
940
00:52:37,238 --> 00:52:40,865
will be visited tenfold
upon your head.
941
00:52:43,244 --> 00:52:44,702
By God, sir,
942
00:52:45,246 --> 00:52:48,248
I will not abide another toe.
943
00:52:48,874 --> 00:52:54,254
I hear the cottonwoods
whispering above
944
00:52:54,338 --> 00:52:56,464
That wasn't her toe, Dude.
945
00:52:58,217 --> 00:53:01,219
Whose toe was it, Walter?
How the fuck should I know?
946
00:53:01,345 --> 00:53:04,848
I do know that nothing about it indicates.
.. The nail polish, Walter.
947
00:53:04,932 --> 00:53:06,224
Fine, Dude.
948
00:53:06,308 --> 00:53:10,186
As if it's impossible to get some nail
polish, apply it to someone else's toe. ..
949
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:11,563
Someone else. ..
Pinking shears.
950
00:53:11,647 --> 00:53:13,022
Where the fuck are
they gonna get. ..
951
00:53:13,107 --> 00:53:15,859
You want a toe?
I can get you a toe.
952
00:53:15,943 --> 00:53:17,819
Believe me,
there are ways, Dude.
953
00:53:17,945 --> 00:53:20,196
You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
Yeah, but, Walter. ..
954
00:53:20,281 --> 00:53:23,700
Hell, I could get you a toe by 3:00
this afternoon with nail polish.
955
00:53:23,784 --> 00:53:25,702
These fucking amateurs.
Walter. ..
956
00:53:25,786 --> 00:53:28,621
They send us a toe, we're supposed
to shit ourselves with fear.
957
00:53:28,706 --> 00:53:30,248
Jesus Christ!
Walter. ..
958
00:53:30,374 --> 00:53:32,458
The point is. ..
They're gonna kill her, Walter,
959
00:53:32,543 --> 00:53:34,210
and then they're
gonna kill me.
960
00:53:34,295 --> 00:53:36,754
Dude, that's. ..
961
00:53:38,048 --> 00:53:40,216
That's just the
stress talking, man.
962
00:53:40,301 --> 00:53:45,346
Now, so far we have what appears to me
to be a series of victimless crimes.
963
00:53:45,431 --> 00:53:47,974
What about the toe?
Forget about the fucking toe!
964
00:53:48,058 --> 00:53:51,185
Excuse me, sir.
Could you please keep your voices down?
965
00:53:51,270 --> 00:53:53,062
This is a family restaurant.
966
00:53:53,147 --> 00:53:55,565
Oh, please! Dear,
for your information,
967
00:53:55,649 --> 00:53:58,443
the Supreme Court has roundly
rejected prior restraint.
968
00:53:58,527 --> 00:54:00,904
Come on. Walter, this is not a
First Amendment thing, man.
969
00:54:00,988 --> 00:54:04,157
Sir, if you don't calm down, I'm
gonna have to ask you to leave.
970
00:54:04,241 --> 00:54:07,327
Lady, I got buddies who
died face down in the muck
971
00:54:07,411 --> 00:54:10,079
so that you and I can enjoy
this family restaurant!
972
00:54:10,205 --> 00:54:13,541
All right, I'm out of here.
Hey, Dude, don't go away, man.
973
00:54:13,626 --> 00:54:17,587
Come on. This affects all of us, man!
It's our basic freedoms!
974
00:54:22,343 --> 00:54:23,801
I'm staying.
975
00:54:26,013 --> 00:54:28,014
I'm finishing my coffee.
976
00:54:32,853 --> 00:54:34,646
Enjoying my coffee.
977
00:54:50,871 --> 00:54:53,039
The Dude is not in.
978
00:54:53,123 --> 00:54:55,959
Leave a message after the beep.
it takes a minute.
979
00:54:57,169 --> 00:55:00,880
Mr. Lebowski, this is Duty
Officer Rolvaag of the LAPD.
980
00:55:00,965 --> 00:55:02,465
We've recovered
your automobile.
981
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:05,843
It can be claimed at the North Hollywood
Auto Circus there on Victory.
982
00:55:05,928 --> 00:55:07,053
Their hours there are...
983
00:55:07,137 --> 00:55:08,680
Far out, man. Far fucking out!
984
00:55:19,149 --> 00:55:22,527
Hey! This is a private
residence, man.
985
00:55:30,911 --> 00:55:32,745
Oh, nice marmot.
986
00:55:42,506 --> 00:55:46,592
Where is the money, Lebowski?
We wants the money, Lebowski!
987
00:55:52,599 --> 00:55:55,810
You think we are kidding or
making with the funny stuff?
988
00:55:55,894 --> 00:55:58,187
We could do things you haven't
dreamed of, Lebowski.
989
00:55:58,313 --> 00:56:02,233
Ja, we believes in nothing.
We believes in nothing, Lebowski. Nothing!
990
00:56:02,317 --> 00:56:05,653
And tomorrow we come back
and we cut off your johnson.
991
00:56:05,738 --> 00:56:08,990
Excuse me?
I said, we cut off your johnson!
992
00:56:09,074 --> 00:56:11,492
Just think about that,
Lebowski.
993
00:56:11,577 --> 00:56:13,494
Your wiggly penis, Lebowski.
994
00:56:13,579 --> 00:56:15,913
Ja. Maybe we stomp on it
and squish it.
995
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:29,302
It was discovered last night in Van
Nuys lodged against an abutment.
996
00:56:29,386 --> 00:56:31,179
Oh, man. Lodged where?
997
00:56:31,263 --> 00:56:33,556
You're lucky she didn't
get chopped, Mr. Lebowski.
998
00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,059
Oh, man!
Must've been a joyride situation.
999
00:56:36,143 --> 00:56:38,686
They abandoned the vehicle once
they hit the retaining wall.
1000
00:56:38,771 --> 00:56:42,106
Oh, my fucking briefcase, man!
It's not here! Shit!
1001
00:56:42,191 --> 00:56:43,900
Yeah, I saw that
on the report. Sorry.
1002
00:56:43,984 --> 00:56:45,985
You gotta get in
on the other side.
1003
00:56:47,029 --> 00:56:50,198
The side view was found
on the road by the car.
1004
00:56:51,784 --> 00:56:55,703
You're lucky they left the tape
deck though, and the Creedence.
1005
00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:58,706
Oh, Jesus!
What's that smell, man?
1006
00:56:58,791 --> 00:57:01,834
Yeah. It's probably
a vagrant slept in the car.
1007
00:57:01,919 --> 00:57:04,670
Or maybe just used it
as a toilet and moved on.
1008
00:57:04,755 --> 00:57:06,005
Hey, man,
1009
00:57:07,341 --> 00:57:08,966
are you gonna find these guys?
1010
00:57:09,051 --> 00:57:13,596
Or, you know, I mean. ..
You got any promising leads or. ..
1011
00:57:13,889 --> 00:57:15,431
Leads?
1012
00:57:15,516 --> 00:57:17,100
Yeah. Sure.
1013
00:57:17,184 --> 00:57:20,436
I'll just check with the boys
down at the crime lab.
1014
00:57:20,521 --> 00:57:24,357
They got four more detectives
working on the case.
1015
00:57:24,441 --> 00:57:26,067
They got us working in shifts!
1016
00:57:31,532 --> 00:57:32,698
Leads!
1017
00:57:33,534 --> 00:57:35,952
My only hope is that
the big Lebowski kills me
1018
00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:37,745
before the Germans
can cut my dick off.
1019
00:57:37,830 --> 00:57:38,955
Leads!
1020
00:57:39,039 --> 00:57:40,706
Now, that is just
ridiculous, Dude.
1021
00:57:40,791 --> 00:57:42,500
No one's going to
cut your dick off.
1022
00:57:42,626 --> 00:57:45,128
Thank you, Walter.
Not if I have anything to say about it.
1023
00:57:45,212 --> 00:57:46,254
Thank you, Walter.
1024
00:57:46,380 --> 00:57:48,381
That makes me feel very secure.
Dude?
1025
00:57:48,507 --> 00:57:51,425
That makes me feel very
warm inside, man. Dude?
1026
00:57:51,510 --> 00:57:54,262
This whole fucking thing.
1027
00:57:54,346 --> 00:57:57,557
I could be sitting here with
just pee stains on my rug.
1028
00:57:57,683 --> 00:58:00,935
But no, man, I got a, you know.
.. Yeah. Fucking Germans.
1029
00:58:01,019 --> 00:58:02,186
Nothing changes.
1030
00:58:03,230 --> 00:58:06,816
Fucking Nazis.
They were Nazis, Dude?
1031
00:58:06,900 --> 00:58:09,485
Oh, come on, Donny.
They were threatening castration!
1032
00:58:09,570 --> 00:58:11,404
Uh-huh.
Are we gonna split hairs here?
1033
00:58:11,488 --> 00:58:12,822
No.
Am I wrong?
1034
00:58:12,906 --> 00:58:16,200
Well, he didn't. ..
Man, they were nihilists, man.
1035
00:58:16,285 --> 00:58:18,828
They kept saying they
believed in nothing.
1036
00:58:18,912 --> 00:58:20,246
Nihilists.
1037
00:58:21,957 --> 00:58:23,249
Fuck me.
1038
00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:28,129
I mean, say what you want about the
tenets of national socialism, Dude.
1039
00:58:28,213 --> 00:58:30,506
At least it's an ethos.
Yeah.
1040
00:58:30,591 --> 00:58:33,301
And, also, let's not forget.
.. Let's not forget, Dude,
1041
00:58:33,385 --> 00:58:36,345
that keeping wildlife,
an amphibious rodent,
1042
00:58:36,430 --> 00:58:39,974
for, you know,
domestic. ..
1043
00:58:40,058 --> 00:58:41,809
Within the city. ..
1044
00:58:42,603 --> 00:58:45,688
That ain't legal, either.
What are you, a fucking park ranger now?
1045
00:58:45,772 --> 00:58:47,356
No! I'm just
trying to. ..
1046
00:58:47,441 --> 00:58:50,151
Who gives a shit
about the fucking marmot?
1047
00:58:50,277 --> 00:58:53,487
We are sympathizing here, Dude.
Fuck sympathy.
1048
00:58:53,572 --> 00:58:57,491
I don't need your fucking sympathy, man.
I need my fucking johnson.
1049
00:58:58,452 --> 00:59:01,662
What do you need that for, Dude?
You have got to buck up, man!
1050
00:59:01,747 --> 00:59:04,540
You cannot drag this negative
energy into the tournament.
1051
00:59:04,625 --> 00:59:07,293
Fuck the tournament.
Fuck you, Walter.
1052
00:59:10,005 --> 00:59:12,006
Fuck the tournament?
1053
00:59:12,090 --> 00:59:15,092
Okay, Dude. I can see you don't
want to be cheered up here.
1054
00:59:15,177 --> 00:59:17,637
Come on, Donny.
Let's go get us a lane.
1055
00:59:22,643 --> 00:59:25,311
Another Caucasian, Gary.
Right, Dude.
1056
00:59:27,814 --> 00:59:31,150
Friends like these, huh, Gary?
That's right, Dude.
1057
00:59:38,742 --> 00:59:43,829
See them tumbling down
1058
00:59:44,790 --> 00:59:50,002
Pledging their love
to the ground
1059
00:59:50,671 --> 00:59:54,924
Lonely, but free,
I'll be found
1060
00:59:55,050 --> 00:59:59,387
You got a good sarsaparilla?
Sioux City Sarsaparilla?
1061
00:59:59,471 --> 01:00:01,430
Yeah. That's a good one.
1062
01:00:04,518 --> 01:00:06,811
How're you doing there,
Dude?
1063
01:00:06,895 --> 01:00:08,980
Not too good, man.
1064
01:00:09,564 --> 01:00:11,983
One of those days, huh?
Yeah.
1065
01:00:13,193 --> 01:00:17,947
Well, a wiser fellow
than myself once said,
1066
01:00:18,031 --> 01:00:19,824
"Sometimes you eat
the bear and. . ."
1067
01:00:21,368 --> 01:00:23,452
Much obliged.
1068
01:00:23,537 --> 01:00:27,373
"Sometimes the bear,
well, he eats you."
1069
01:00:29,084 --> 01:00:31,794
That some kind of
Eastern thing?
1070
01:00:31,878 --> 01:00:33,337
Far from it.
1071
01:00:40,053 --> 01:00:42,054
I like your style, Dude.
1072
01:00:43,307 --> 01:00:47,310
Oh, well, I dig
your style, too, man.
1073
01:00:47,394 --> 01:00:49,687
Got a whole cowboy thing
going.
1074
01:00:54,067 --> 01:00:55,526
Thank you.
1075
01:00:55,610 --> 01:00:57,528
There's just one thing, Dude.
1076
01:00:57,612 --> 01:00:59,363
What's that?
1077
01:00:59,448 --> 01:01:02,074
Do you have to use
so many cuss words?
1078
01:01:05,495 --> 01:01:07,788
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1079
01:01:09,082 --> 01:01:11,542
Okay, Dude. Have it your way.
1080
01:01:13,837 --> 01:01:16,172
Take her easy, Dude.
1081
01:01:16,256 --> 01:01:17,923
Yeah. Thanks, man.
1082
01:01:23,930 --> 01:01:25,639
Call for you, Dude.
1083
01:01:29,311 --> 01:01:33,064
Hello? Jeffrey, you have
not gone to the doctor.
1084
01:01:33,148 --> 01:01:36,233
Oh, yeah, no.
No, I haven't yet.
1085
01:01:36,318 --> 01:01:38,819
I'd like to see you
immediately.
1086
01:01:39,738 --> 01:01:40,780
Oh?
1087
01:01:53,460 --> 01:01:56,754
So, you're Lebowski.
Yeah.
1088
01:01:59,633 --> 01:02:01,759
Maude has told me
all about you.
1089
01:02:01,843 --> 01:02:04,303
She'll be back in a minute.
Sit down.
1090
01:02:04,721 --> 01:02:07,723
Do you want a drink?
Yeah, sure. White Russian.
1091
01:02:08,683 --> 01:02:10,476
The bar's over there.
1092
01:02:15,315 --> 01:02:19,402
So, what do you do, Lebowski?
Who the fuck are you, man?
1093
01:02:20,904 --> 01:02:24,740
Just a friend of Maudie's. Yeah?
The friend with the cleft asshole?
1094
01:02:27,911 --> 01:02:30,454
What do you do?
Oh, nothing much.
1095
01:02:31,665 --> 01:02:33,582
Hello, Jeffrey.
Hello.
1096
01:02:33,667 --> 01:02:36,544
Yeah. How are you?
Listen, Maude.
1097
01:02:37,295 --> 01:02:38,838
I got to
1098
01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:43,467
tender my resignation
or whatever
1099
01:02:43,552 --> 01:02:48,556
because looks like your mother
really was kidnapped after all.
1100
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:50,683
She most certainly was not.
1101
01:02:50,767 --> 01:02:55,813
Hey, man, why don't you
fucking listen occasionally?
1102
01:02:55,897 --> 01:02:58,441
You might learn something.
Now, I got. ..
1103
01:02:58,608 --> 01:03:01,360
Please don't call her
my mother.
1104
01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:04,280
She's most definitely the
perpetrator and not the victim.
1105
01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:07,199
I'm telling you, I've got
pretty definitive evidence.
1106
01:03:07,284 --> 01:03:10,119
From who?
From the main guy, Uli.
1107
01:03:10,203 --> 01:03:13,539
Uli Kunkel? Her costar
in the beaver picture?
1108
01:03:15,208 --> 01:03:18,294
You mean vagina?
I mean, you know the guy?
1109
01:03:18,378 --> 01:03:21,213
I might have introduced them,
for all I know.
1110
01:03:21,298 --> 01:03:23,466
Do you remember Uli?
1111
01:03:23,550 --> 01:03:26,302
He's a musician.
Used to have a group, Autobahn.
1112
01:03:26,386 --> 01:03:30,931
Look in my LP's.
They released one album in the late '70s.
1113
01:03:31,016 --> 01:03:33,934
Their music is
sort of a techno pop.
1114
01:03:34,060 --> 01:03:37,480
So he's pretending to be the abductor?
Well, yeah.
1115
01:03:37,564 --> 01:03:40,941
Look, Jeffrey, you don't really kidnap
someone you're acquainted with.
1116
01:03:41,026 --> 01:03:45,529
The whole idea is that the hostage can't
identify you after you've let them go.
1117
01:03:45,614 --> 01:03:47,323
Well, I know that.
1118
01:03:51,495 --> 01:03:54,163
What the fuck is with this guy?
Who is he?
1119
01:03:54,247 --> 01:03:57,750
Knox Harrington,
the video artist.
1120
01:03:57,834 --> 01:03:59,752
So, Uli has the money.
1121
01:04:00,962 --> 01:04:04,507
Well, no, not exactly.
1122
01:04:05,383 --> 01:04:07,218
This is a very complicated
case, Maude.
1123
01:04:09,387 --> 01:04:10,513
A lot of what-have-yous
1124
01:04:10,597 --> 01:04:13,182
and a lot of strands
to keep in my head, man.
1125
01:04:13,266 --> 01:04:15,726
You know, a lot of strands
in the old Duder's head.
1126
01:04:15,810 --> 01:04:17,019
Hello?
1127
01:04:17,103 --> 01:04:18,979
If Uli doesn't have it,
then who does?
1128
01:04:19,064 --> 01:04:20,981
It's Sandra
about the Biennale.
1129
01:04:21,066 --> 01:04:24,568
Look. I have to take this.
Do you still have that doctor's number?
1130
01:04:24,653 --> 01:04:28,197
No, really, it's not even bruised anymore.
Oh, please, Jeffrey.
1131
01:04:28,281 --> 01:04:31,367
I don't want to be responsible
for any delayed aftereffects.
1132
01:04:33,912 --> 01:04:35,538
Aftereffects?
1133
01:05:04,985 --> 01:05:08,279
Could you slide your shorts
down, Mr. Lebowski, please?
1134
01:05:08,363 --> 01:05:09,446
Mmm?
1135
01:05:09,781 --> 01:05:11,740
No, no, man.
She hit me right here.
1136
01:05:11,825 --> 01:05:15,494
I understand. Could you slide
your shorts down, please?
1137
01:05:26,631 --> 01:05:28,924
Just got home from Illinois
1138
01:05:29,009 --> 01:05:31,176
Locked the front door, oh, boy
1139
01:05:31,261 --> 01:05:35,472
Got to sit down,
take a rest on the porch
1140
01:05:35,849 --> 01:05:38,017
Imagination sets in
1141
01:05:38,101 --> 01:05:40,311
Pretty soon I'm singin'
1142
01:05:40,395 --> 01:05:42,229
Doo, doo, doo
1143
01:05:42,314 --> 01:05:44,398
Looking out my back door
1144
01:05:44,482 --> 01:05:47,192
Keeping mighty cool.
There's a giant doing cartwheels
1145
01:05:47,277 --> 01:05:49,528
A statue wearing high heels
1146
01:05:49,613 --> 01:05:51,864
Look at all the
happy creatures
1147
01:05:51,948 --> 01:05:54,199
Dancing on the lawn
1148
01:05:54,284 --> 01:05:58,621
A dinosaur Victrola
listening to Buck Owens
1149
01:05:58,747 --> 01:06:00,748
Doo, doo, doo
1150
01:06:00,832 --> 01:06:02,916
Looking out my back door
1151
01:06:03,376 --> 01:06:07,713
Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the band
1152
01:06:09,215 --> 01:06:10,382
Doo, doo, doo
1153
01:06:10,467 --> 01:06:14,428
Wondrous apparition
provided by magician
1154
01:06:14,888 --> 01:06:16,722
Doo, doo, doo
1155
01:06:16,806 --> 01:06:19,475
Looking out my back door
1156
01:06:37,744 --> 01:06:41,997
Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the band
1157
01:06:42,082 --> 01:06:45,501
Won't you take a ride
on the flying spoon?
1158
01:06:45,585 --> 01:06:47,002
Doo, doo, doo
1159
01:06:47,087 --> 01:06:48,837
Bother me tomorrow
1160
01:06:48,922 --> 01:06:51,382
Today I'll buy no sorrows
1161
01:06:51,466 --> 01:06:52,883
Doo, doo, doo
1162
01:06:52,967 --> 01:06:55,761
Looking out my back door
1163
01:07:48,148 --> 01:07:51,608
He lives in North Hollywood on
Radford, near the In-N-Out Burger.
1164
01:07:51,693 --> 01:07:53,861
No, the In-N-Out
Burger's on Camrose.
1165
01:07:53,945 --> 01:07:56,363
Near the In-N-Out Burger.
Those are good burgers, Walter.
1166
01:07:56,448 --> 01:07:59,324
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
The kid is in the ninth grade, Dude.
1167
01:07:59,409 --> 01:08:02,035
And his father is. ..
Are you ready for this?
1168
01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:05,456
His father is
Arthur Digby Sellers.
1169
01:08:05,540 --> 01:08:07,124
Who the fuck is that?
1170
01:08:07,208 --> 01:08:10,252
Who the fuck is Arthur Digby Sellers?
Who the. ..
1171
01:08:10,336 --> 01:08:12,713
Have you ever heard of a little
show called Branded, Dude?
1172
01:08:12,797 --> 01:08:13,839
Yes, yes, I. ..
1173
01:08:13,923 --> 01:08:15,924
"All but one man died
there at Bitter Creek."
1174
01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:18,260
I know the fucking show,
Walter. So what?
1175
01:08:18,344 --> 01:08:22,389
Fucking Arthur Digby Sellers
wrote 1 56 episodes, Dude.
1176
01:08:22,474 --> 01:08:24,183
The bulk of the series.
1177
01:08:24,267 --> 01:08:25,309
Oh.
1178
01:08:25,351 --> 01:08:27,936
Not exactly a lightweight. No.
1179
01:08:28,021 --> 01:08:30,355
And yet his son
is a fucking dunce.
1180
01:08:31,858 --> 01:08:34,568
Anyway, we'll go there
after the what-have-you.
1181
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,320
We'll brace the kid.
Should be a pushover.
1182
01:08:36,404 --> 01:08:37,613
We'll be near
the In-N-Out Burger.
1183
01:08:37,697 --> 01:08:38,822
Shut the fuck up, Donny!
1184
01:08:41,117 --> 01:08:44,328
We'll go out there, we'll brace the kid.
He should be a pushover.
1185
01:08:44,412 --> 01:08:46,538
We'll get that fucking
million dollars back,
1186
01:08:46,623 --> 01:08:48,749
if he hasn't
spent it already.
1187
01:08:48,833 --> 01:08:50,876
A million fucking clams.
1188
01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:54,630
And, yes, we'll be near the.
.. In-N-Out.
1189
01:08:55,048 --> 01:08:58,467
Shh ! Shh! Some burgers, some beers.
A few laughs.
1190
01:09:01,179 --> 01:09:03,472
Our fucking troubles
are over, Dude.
1191
01:09:15,944 --> 01:09:18,946
Oh, fuck me, man.
1192
01:09:19,030 --> 01:09:21,824
That kid's already spent
all the money, man.
1193
01:09:21,908 --> 01:09:24,159
New Vette? Hardly, Dude.
1194
01:09:24,244 --> 01:09:29,581
I'd say he still has $960,000, $970,000
left, depending on the options.
1195
01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:31,291
Wait in the car, Donny.
1196
01:09:35,463 --> 01:09:37,464
Yes?
Pilar?
1197
01:09:38,675 --> 01:09:42,803
My name is Walter Sobchak.
This is my associate, Jeffrey Lebowski.
1198
01:09:44,222 --> 01:09:46,515
We came to talk
about little Larry.
1199
01:09:46,599 --> 01:09:48,684
May we come in?
Yes, yes.
1200
01:09:48,768 --> 01:09:50,102
Thank you.
1201
01:09:54,440 --> 01:09:56,066
That's him, Dude.
1202
01:10:03,616 --> 01:10:06,076
And a good day
to you, sir!
1203
01:10:06,160 --> 01:10:08,161
Sit down, please.
1204
01:10:13,585 --> 01:10:16,378
Larry, sweetie,
the man is here!
1205
01:10:16,462 --> 01:10:19,298
Is he. ..
Does he still write?
1206
01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:22,509
Oh, no, no.
He has health problems.
1207
01:10:22,677 --> 01:10:23,886
Uh-huh.
1208
01:10:25,638 --> 01:10:27,681
Sir, I just want to say
1209
01:10:28,683 --> 01:10:31,143
that we're both,
on a personal level,
1210
01:10:32,645 --> 01:10:34,605
really enormous fans.
1211
01:10:34,689 --> 01:10:37,858
Branded, especially
the early episodes,
1212
01:10:37,942 --> 01:10:40,068
was truly a source
of inspiration.
1213
01:10:40,153 --> 01:10:42,946
Sweetie, sit down.
This man is the police.
1214
01:10:43,031 --> 01:10:46,617
Oh, no, ma'am. We didn't want to give the
impression that we were police, exactly.
1215
01:10:46,701 --> 01:10:49,453
We're hoping it won't be
necessary to call the police.
1216
01:10:49,537 --> 01:10:51,997
But that's up to
little Larry here.
1217
01:10:52,081 --> 01:10:53,707
Isn't it, Larry?
1218
01:11:04,594 --> 01:11:06,720
Is this your homework,
Larry?
1219
01:11:08,181 --> 01:11:10,390
Is this your homework, Larry?
Look, man, it. ..
1220
01:11:10,475 --> 01:11:13,852
Dude. Please?
Is this your homework, Larry?
1221
01:11:13,937 --> 01:11:15,312
Just ask him about
the car, man.
1222
01:11:15,396 --> 01:11:17,731
Is this yours, Larry?
Is this your homework, Larry?
1223
01:11:17,815 --> 01:11:19,024
Is that your car out front?
1224
01:11:19,067 --> 01:11:22,027
Is this your homework, Larry?
We know it's his fucking homework!
1225
01:11:22,111 --> 01:11:24,363
Where's the fucking money,
you little brat?
1226
01:11:24,447 --> 01:11:27,449
Look, Larry, have you
ever heard of Vietnam?
1227
01:11:27,575 --> 01:11:29,868
For Christ's sake, Walter.
You are entering a world of pain, son.
1228
01:11:29,953 --> 01:11:32,621
We know that this is your homework.
We know that you stole the car.
1229
01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:35,248
And the fucking money.
And the fucking money!
1230
01:11:35,333 --> 01:11:37,000
And we know that
this is your homework!
1231
01:11:37,085 --> 01:11:38,293
We're gonna cut
your dick off, Larry.
1232
01:11:38,378 --> 01:11:40,337
You're killing
your father, Larry.
1233
01:11:43,508 --> 01:11:45,592
All right.
This is pointless.
1234
01:11:46,886 --> 01:11:49,554
Okay, time for Plan B.
1235
01:11:51,808 --> 01:11:54,768
You might want to watch out
that front window, Larry.
1236
01:11:56,062 --> 01:11:59,439
Son, this is what happens when
you fuck a stranger in the ass!
1237
01:12:01,109 --> 01:12:03,068
A little language
problem here.
1238
01:12:03,152 --> 01:12:05,529
Little prick's
stonewalling me.
1239
01:12:06,406 --> 01:12:07,948
Walter.
1240
01:12:08,658 --> 01:12:10,659
What are you doing, man?
1241
01:12:13,287 --> 01:12:15,080
What are you doing?
1242
01:12:16,416 --> 01:12:18,083
Here you go, Larry.
1243
01:12:18,167 --> 01:12:20,168
You see what happens?
1244
01:12:20,253 --> 01:12:22,295
You see what happens, Larry?
1245
01:12:23,047 --> 01:12:24,881
You see what happens?
Oh, great.
1246
01:12:24,966 --> 01:12:28,552
This is what happens when you fuck
a stranger in the ass, Larry.
1247
01:12:31,597 --> 01:12:33,223
This is what happens, Larry.
1248
01:12:33,307 --> 01:12:35,142
You see what happens, Larry?
1249
01:12:35,226 --> 01:12:37,644
You see what happens when you
fuck a stranger in the ass?
1250
01:12:37,770 --> 01:12:40,063
This is what happens!
1251
01:12:42,316 --> 01:12:44,693
You see what happens, Larry?
1252
01:12:44,777 --> 01:12:48,488
Do you see what happens, Larry, when
you fuck a stranger in the ass?
1253
01:12:49,741 --> 01:12:53,035
This is what happens, Larry!
1254
01:12:53,119 --> 01:12:55,871
My car! My baby!
This is what happens, Larry!
1255
01:12:55,955 --> 01:12:57,914
This is what happens
when you fuck a stranger. ..
1256
01:12:57,999 --> 01:13:00,667
What the fuck are you
doing, man? Stop it!
1257
01:13:00,793 --> 01:13:03,253
Hey, man. I just bought
that fucking car last week!
1258
01:13:03,379 --> 01:13:06,381
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm sorry!
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
1259
01:13:06,507 --> 01:13:09,634
I just bought the fucking car last week!
Come on, man.
1260
01:13:09,719 --> 01:13:11,553
I'll kill your
fucking car, man!
1261
01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:13,680
No, no. Hey, hey,
that's not his! Hey!
1262
01:13:13,765 --> 01:13:16,224
God damn it!
Whoa! Oh, no!
1263
01:13:16,309 --> 01:13:18,101
Fuck you!
Man. No.
1264
01:13:18,186 --> 01:13:20,687
You like that? Fuck you!
1265
01:13:20,772 --> 01:13:24,232
1266
01:13:24,317 --> 01:13:26,234
I'll kill your fucking car!
1267
01:13:47,256 --> 01:13:49,174
I accept your apology.
1268
01:13:50,343 --> 01:13:53,845
No, I just want to handle it
by myself from now on.
1269
01:13:55,056 --> 01:13:57,099
No. No. No!
1270
01:13:57,183 --> 01:13:59,017
That has nothing
to do with it.
1271
01:14:00,394 --> 01:14:03,772
Yes, the car made it home.
You're calling me at home.
1272
01:14:05,399 --> 01:14:10,153
No, Walter, it did not look
like Larry was about to crack!
1273
01:14:12,365 --> 01:14:14,366
Well, that's your perception.
1274
01:14:16,077 --> 01:14:18,745
You know, Walter,
you're right.
1275
01:14:18,830 --> 01:14:20,789
There is an unspoken
message here.
1276
01:14:20,873 --> 01:14:23,291
It's, "Fuck you!
Leave me the fuck alone!"
1277
01:14:26,212 --> 01:14:28,046
Yeah, I'll be at practice.
1278
01:14:45,648 --> 01:14:47,482
Pin your diapers on,
Lebowski.
1279
01:14:47,567 --> 01:14:49,317
Jackie Treehorn
wants to see you.
1280
01:14:49,402 --> 01:14:52,279
Jackie Treehorn knows which
Lebowski you are, Lebowski.
1281
01:14:52,363 --> 01:14:55,198
Jackie Treehorn wants to
see the deadbeat Lebowski.
1282
01:14:55,283 --> 01:14:57,159
You're not dealing
with morons here.
1283
01:15:45,208 --> 01:15:48,210
Hello, Dude.
Thanks for coming.
1284
01:15:48,294 --> 01:15:49,961
I'm Jackie Treehorn.
1285
01:15:52,882 --> 01:15:55,592
This is quite a pad
you got here, man.
1286
01:15:55,676 --> 01:15:57,677
Completely unspoiled.
1287
01:15:57,762 --> 01:16:00,972
What's your drink, Dude?
A White Russian. Thanks.
1288
01:16:01,849 --> 01:16:03,141
White Russian.
1289
01:16:03,768 --> 01:16:07,729
How's the smut business, Jackie?
I wouldn't know, Dude.
1290
01:16:07,813 --> 01:16:13,235
I deal in publishing, entertainment,
political advocacy.
1291
01:16:13,319 --> 01:16:16,571
Which one's Logjammin'?
Yes, regrettably, it's true.
1292
01:16:16,656 --> 01:16:19,491
Standards have fallen
in adult entertainment.
1293
01:16:19,575 --> 01:16:21,201
It's video, Dude.
1294
01:16:22,036 --> 01:16:23,870
Now that we're competing
with those amateurs,
1295
01:16:23,955 --> 01:16:27,499
we can't afford to invest
in little extras like story,
1296
01:16:28,334 --> 01:16:31,253
production value, feelings.
1297
01:16:33,005 --> 01:16:38,218
You know, people forget that the
brain is the biggest erogenous zone.
1298
01:16:38,844 --> 01:16:40,428
On you maybe.
1299
01:16:40,513 --> 01:16:42,430
Of course, you have to take
the good with the bad.
1300
01:16:42,515 --> 01:16:45,433
New technology permits us
to do very exciting things
1301
01:16:45,518 --> 01:16:48,228
in interactive
erotic software.
1302
01:16:48,312 --> 01:16:52,399
Wave of the future, Dude.
1 00% electronic.
1303
01:16:53,734 --> 01:16:56,361
Well, I still jerk off
manually.
1304
01:16:58,656 --> 01:17:03,034
Of course you do. I can see you're
anxious for me to get to the point.
1305
01:17:03,119 --> 01:17:05,829
Well, here it is, Dude.
1306
01:17:05,913 --> 01:17:07,497
Where's Bunny?
1307
01:17:07,540 --> 01:17:10,125
Well, I thought you might know that, man.
Why would I?
1308
01:17:10,209 --> 01:17:14,462
She only ran off to get away from
that rather sizable debt to me.
1309
01:17:14,547 --> 01:17:16,965
No, she didn't run off.
She's been. ..
1310
01:17:17,049 --> 01:17:19,134
I heard that kidnapping story,
so save it.
1311
01:17:19,218 --> 01:17:21,219
I know you're mixed up
in all this, Dude.
1312
01:17:22,847 --> 01:17:25,974
And I don't care what you're
trying to get from the husband.
1313
01:17:26,058 --> 01:17:27,559
That's your business.
1314
01:17:27,643 --> 01:17:31,479
All I'm saying is I want mine.
1315
01:17:31,564 --> 01:17:32,814
Yeah, right, man.
1316
01:17:32,898 --> 01:17:36,776
I mean, there are a lot of
facets to this,
1317
01:17:36,902 --> 01:17:38,778
a lot of interested parties.
1318
01:17:39,196 --> 01:17:40,530
Excuse me.
1319
01:17:46,245 --> 01:17:47,329
Yeah?
1320
01:17:48,289 --> 01:17:49,456
Oh, yeah?
1321
01:17:49,540 --> 01:17:50,957
Where is that?
1322
01:17:54,587 --> 01:17:56,713
All right. Yeah.
1323
01:17:59,717 --> 01:18:01,051
Excuse me.
1324
01:18:36,545 --> 01:18:40,215
Forgive me.
No problemo, man.
1325
01:18:40,299 --> 01:18:44,636
So, if I can find your money,
1326
01:18:46,430 --> 01:18:48,306
what's in it for the Dude?
1327
01:18:48,391 --> 01:18:51,559
Well, of course, there's that to discuss.
You want a refill?
1328
01:18:51,644 --> 01:18:55,105
Yeah, does the pope shit in the woods?
1 0% finder's fee.
1329
01:18:55,189 --> 01:18:58,650
That all right?
Okay. Done, Jackie.
1330
01:18:59,610 --> 01:19:01,903
I dig the way
you do business, man.
1331
01:19:01,987 --> 01:19:05,615
Your money is being held by
a kid named Larry Sellers.
1332
01:19:05,699 --> 01:19:08,451
He lives in North Hollywood
on Radford,
1333
01:19:09,662 --> 01:19:12,163
by the In-N-Out Burger.
1334
01:19:12,248 --> 01:19:13,289
Fucking brat.
1335
01:19:13,374 --> 01:19:17,585
But I'm sure your goons can get it off him.
I mean, he's 1 5.
1336
01:19:19,839 --> 01:19:21,798
Flunking social studies.
1337
01:19:25,177 --> 01:19:28,054
So, if you could just
1338
01:19:28,139 --> 01:19:32,434
write me a check for
my 1 0% of half a million,
1339
01:19:32,518 --> 01:19:35,603
5 grand,
I'll go out and mingle.
1340
01:19:40,067 --> 01:19:42,527
You mix a hell of
a Caucasian, Jackie.
1341
01:19:44,029 --> 01:19:46,114
Fifteen-year-old kid.
1342
01:19:46,866 --> 01:19:50,869
Is this some sort of a joke?
No. No joke.
1343
01:19:52,663 --> 01:19:55,790
No funny stuff, Jackie.
The kid's got it.
1344
01:19:55,875 --> 01:19:57,041
Hi, fellas.
1345
01:19:59,753 --> 01:20:01,379
Kid just wanted a car.
1346
01:20:04,675 --> 01:20:08,052
All the Dude ever wanted
was his rug back.
1347
01:20:08,554 --> 01:20:09,888
Not greedy.
1348
01:20:11,557 --> 01:20:12,932
It really
1349
01:20:14,560 --> 01:20:16,269
tied the room together.
1350
01:20:19,231 --> 01:20:22,400
Darkness washed
over the Dude.
1351
01:20:22,485 --> 01:20:26,988
Darker than a black steer's tokus
on a moonless prairie night.
1352
01:20:27,948 --> 01:20:30,742
There was no bottom.
1353
01:20:44,840 --> 01:20:47,258
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1354
01:20:47,343 --> 01:20:50,929
What condition
my condition was in
1355
01:20:52,932 --> 01:20:58,269
I woke up this morning
with the sundown shining in
1356
01:21:01,273 --> 01:21:06,611
I found my mind in
a brown paper bag within
1357
01:21:09,490 --> 01:21:13,743
I tripped on a cloud
and fell-a eight miles high
1358
01:21:13,827 --> 01:21:17,872
I tore my mind on a jagged sky
1359
01:21:17,957 --> 01:21:19,707
I just dropped in
1360
01:21:19,792 --> 01:21:23,962
To see what condition
my condition was in
1361
01:21:24,338 --> 01:21:27,006
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1362
01:21:27,091 --> 01:21:30,385
What condition
my condition was in
1363
01:21:36,642 --> 01:21:40,228
I pushed my soul
in a deep, dark hole
1364
01:21:40,312 --> 01:21:42,981
And then l followed it in
1365
01:21:44,900 --> 01:21:48,027
I watched myself crawlin' out
1366
01:21:48,112 --> 01:21:51,990
As l was a-crawlin' in
1367
01:21:52,616 --> 01:21:55,076
I got up so tight
1368
01:21:55,160 --> 01:21:57,287
l couldn't unwind
1369
01:21:57,371 --> 01:22:01,499
I saw so much I broke my mind
1370
01:22:01,584 --> 01:22:03,418
I just dropped in
1371
01:22:03,502 --> 01:22:07,213
To see what condition
my condition was in
1372
01:22:16,181 --> 01:22:18,766
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1373
01:22:18,851 --> 01:22:22,103
What condition
my condition was in
1374
01:22:27,985 --> 01:22:31,779
Someone painted "April Fool"
1375
01:22:31,864 --> 01:22:34,490
In big, black letters
on a "Dead End" sign
1376
01:22:36,118 --> 01:22:40,496
I had my foot on the gas
as l left the road
1377
01:22:40,581 --> 01:22:44,167
And blew out my mind
1378
01:22:44,668 --> 01:22:49,088
Eight miles out of Memphis
and I got no spare
1379
01:22:49,173 --> 01:22:53,051
Eight miles straight up
downtown somewhere
1380
01:22:53,385 --> 01:22:55,303
I just dropped in
1381
01:22:55,387 --> 01:22:59,724
To see what condition
my condition was in
1382
01:23:01,143 --> 01:23:03,478
I said I just dropped in
1383
01:23:03,562 --> 01:23:07,732
To see what condition
my condition was in
1384
01:23:08,108 --> 01:23:11,194
Yeah, yeah
1385
01:23:11,278 --> 01:23:13,278
Oh, yeah
1386
01:24:11,714 --> 01:24:15,133
He was innocent
1387
01:24:16,051 --> 01:24:19,679
Not a charge was true
1388
01:24:20,389 --> 01:24:25,977
And they say
he ran away branded
1389
01:24:39,366 --> 01:24:41,200
Is this your only ID?
1390
01:24:41,994 --> 01:24:43,911
I know my rights, man.
1391
01:24:46,039 --> 01:24:47,790
You don't know shit, Lebowski.
1392
01:24:47,875 --> 01:24:50,585
I want a fucking lawyer,
man.
1393
01:24:50,669 --> 01:24:54,839
I want Bill Kunstler, man,
1394
01:24:56,341 --> 01:24:58,050
or Ron Kuby.
1395
01:24:58,135 --> 01:25:01,304
Mr. Treehorn tells us
that he had to eject you
1396
01:25:01,388 --> 01:25:03,389
from his garden party,
1397
01:25:03,849 --> 01:25:05,767
that you were drunk
and abusive.
1398
01:25:05,851 --> 01:25:10,938
Mr. Treehorn treats objects
like women, man.
1399
01:25:11,440 --> 01:25:14,567
Mr. Treehorn draws
a lot of water in this town.
1400
01:25:14,651 --> 01:25:17,028
You don't draw shit, Lebowski.
1401
01:25:17,112 --> 01:25:19,822
Now, we got a nice quiet
little beach community here,
1402
01:25:19,907 --> 01:25:22,450
and I aim to keep it
nice and quiet.
1403
01:25:22,534 --> 01:25:24,869
So let me make
something plain.
1404
01:25:25,412 --> 01:25:29,499
I don't like you sucking around
bothering our citizens, Lebowski.
1405
01:25:30,209 --> 01:25:32,460
I don't like your
jerk-off name.
1406
01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:33,795
I don't like your
jerk-off face.
1407
01:25:33,879 --> 01:25:35,505
I don't like your
jerk-off behavior.
1408
01:25:35,589 --> 01:25:38,549
And I don't like you,
jerk-off.
1409
01:25:42,221 --> 01:25:44,096
Do I make myself clear?
1410
01:25:47,226 --> 01:25:49,227
I'm sorry. I wasn't listening.
1411
01:25:50,729 --> 01:25:51,771
Ow!
1412
01:25:51,855 --> 01:25:53,439
Fucking fascist!
1413
01:25:55,067 --> 01:25:57,235
Stay out of Malibu,
Lebowski.
1414
01:25:58,070 --> 01:26:00,196
Stay out of Malibu, deadbeat!
1415
01:26:01,365 --> 01:26:05,868
Keep your ugly, fucking, gold-bricking
ass out of my beach community.
1416
01:26:06,036 --> 01:26:08,704
I want to sleep with you
1417
01:26:08,789 --> 01:26:11,916
In the desert tonight
1418
01:26:13,168 --> 01:26:17,797
With a billion stars
all around
1419
01:26:18,674 --> 01:26:21,843
Jesus, man. Could you
change the channel?
1420
01:26:21,927 --> 01:26:23,594
Fuck you, man!
If you don't like my fucking music,
1421
01:26:23,679 --> 01:26:25,179
get your own fucking cab!
1422
01:26:25,264 --> 01:26:26,347
I had a really rough. ..
1423
01:26:26,431 --> 01:26:28,182
I'll pull off to the side
and kick your ass out.
1424
01:26:28,267 --> 01:26:32,979
Man, come on. I had a rough night,
and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.
1425
01:26:40,737 --> 01:26:43,322
Out of my fucking cab! Out!
Man!
1426
01:26:44,783 --> 01:26:46,951
Man ! Man ! Hey!
1427
01:26:58,130 --> 01:27:02,049
There's a thousand pretty
women waiting out there
1428
01:27:02,134 --> 01:27:05,887
And they're all livin'
devil may care
1429
01:27:05,971 --> 01:27:09,557
And I'm just the devil
with love to spare
1430
01:27:09,808 --> 01:27:13,102
So viva Las Vegas
1431
01:27:13,937 --> 01:27:17,481
Viva Las Vegas
1432
01:27:29,494 --> 01:27:32,121
Oh, Jesus!
1433
01:27:52,059 --> 01:27:53,309
Jeffrey.
1434
01:27:54,227 --> 01:27:56,103
Maude?
Love me.
1435
01:27:58,899 --> 01:28:00,858
That's my robe.
1436
01:28:02,152 --> 01:28:04,070
Tell me about
yourself, Jeffrey.
1437
01:28:04,905 --> 01:28:07,156
Well, not much to tell.
1438
01:28:08,283 --> 01:28:13,913
I was one of the authors
of the Port Huron Statement.
1439
01:28:15,540 --> 01:28:17,917
The original Port Huron Statement.
Uh-huh.
1440
01:28:18,377 --> 01:28:21,921
Not the compromised
second draft.
1441
01:28:23,840 --> 01:28:25,549
Then I. ..
1442
01:28:26,718 --> 01:28:29,261
You ever hear of
the Seattle Seven?
1443
01:28:29,346 --> 01:28:30,721
That was me.
1444
01:28:33,976 --> 01:28:36,227
And there were
six other guys.
1445
01:28:37,771 --> 01:28:40,982
And then the music business,
briefly.
1446
01:28:41,066 --> 01:28:42,608
Oh?
Yeah.
1447
01:28:42,693 --> 01:28:44,402
Roadie for Metallica.
1448
01:28:44,486 --> 01:28:45,528
Oh.
1449
01:28:45,612 --> 01:28:47,113
Speed of Sound tour.
1450
01:28:47,489 --> 01:28:48,864
Mmm-hmm.
1451
01:28:49,324 --> 01:28:50,992
Bunch of assholes.
1452
01:28:52,285 --> 01:28:55,663
And then, you know, little
of this, little of that.
1453
01:28:57,040 --> 01:29:00,292
My career's slowed down
a little lately.
1454
01:29:00,377 --> 01:29:03,504
What do you do
for recreation?
1455
01:29:04,297 --> 01:29:05,756
Well, the usual.
1456
01:29:05,841 --> 01:29:08,634
Bowl, drive around,
1457
01:29:10,095 --> 01:29:12,430
the occasional
acid flashback.
1458
01:29:18,645 --> 01:29:20,730
What happened
to your house?
1459
01:29:20,814 --> 01:29:23,357
Oh, Jackie Treehorn
trashed the place.
1460
01:29:23,442 --> 01:29:26,360
He thought I had
your father's money.
1461
01:29:26,445 --> 01:29:29,613
He got me out of the way
while he looked for it.
1462
01:29:29,698 --> 01:29:31,824
Cocktail?
No, thanks.
1463
01:29:31,908 --> 01:29:34,994
It's not my father's money.
It's the foundation's.
1464
01:29:35,495 --> 01:29:38,789
Why did he think you have it?
Who does?
1465
01:29:38,874 --> 01:29:43,335
Oh, Larry Sellers, this high school kid.
Real fucking brat.
1466
01:29:43,420 --> 01:29:46,964
You know, this is a very
complicated case, Maude.
1467
01:29:47,049 --> 01:29:49,050
A lot of ins, a lot of outs.
1468
01:29:49,718 --> 01:29:54,263
You know, fortunately, I'm adhering
to a pretty strict, drug regimen
1469
01:29:54,347 --> 01:29:56,599
to keep my mind,
you know, limber,
1470
01:29:56,683 --> 01:30:00,227
and I'm very fucking close
to your father's money.
1471
01:30:00,312 --> 01:30:02,938
I keep telling you, it's
the foundation's money.
1472
01:30:03,023 --> 01:30:04,648
Father doesn't have any.
1473
01:30:06,234 --> 01:30:08,402
What are you talking about?
He's fucking loaded.
1474
01:30:08,487 --> 01:30:10,821
No, no. The wealth
is all Mother's.
1475
01:30:11,615 --> 01:30:13,074
No, he runs stuff.
1476
01:30:13,492 --> 01:30:15,701
We did let him run one
of the companies briefly,
1477
01:30:15,786 --> 01:30:18,704
but he didn't do very well at it.
Oh, he's, you know. ..
1478
01:30:18,789 --> 01:30:21,165
No, he helps administer
the charities now,
1479
01:30:21,249 --> 01:30:23,876
and I give him
a reasonable allowance.
1480
01:30:23,960 --> 01:30:25,628
He has no money of his own.
1481
01:30:25,712 --> 01:30:27,421
I know how he likes
to present himself.
1482
01:30:27,506 --> 01:30:30,800
Father's weakness is vanity,
hence the slut.
1483
01:30:33,053 --> 01:30:34,678
Do you think he. ..
1484
01:30:36,181 --> 01:30:37,515
What is that, yoga?
1485
01:30:37,599 --> 01:30:39,975
It increases the chances
of conception.
1486
01:30:42,938 --> 01:30:45,439
Increases. ..
Well, yes.
1487
01:30:45,524 --> 01:30:48,484
What did you think this was all about?
Fun and games?
1488
01:30:48,568 --> 01:30:50,111
I want a child.
1489
01:30:50,695 --> 01:30:52,530
Okay, yeah, okay.
1490
01:30:52,614 --> 01:30:55,449
But let me. . . Let me explain
something about the Dude.
1491
01:30:55,534 --> 01:30:58,994
Look, Jeffrey,
I don't want a partner.
1492
01:30:59,079 --> 01:31:02,790
In fact, I don't want the father to
be someone I have to see socially
1493
01:31:02,874 --> 01:31:05,960
or who will have any interest
in raising the child himself.
1494
01:31:07,379 --> 01:31:10,881
Oh. So, that doctor. ..
Exactly.
1495
01:31:11,967 --> 01:31:14,844
Now, what happened
to your face?
1496
01:31:15,470 --> 01:31:17,596
Did Jackie Treehorn
do that as well?
1497
01:31:17,681 --> 01:31:22,977
No, it was the chief of police
of Malibu, a real reactionary.
1498
01:31:23,061 --> 01:31:24,812
So, your father. ..
1499
01:31:26,815 --> 01:31:29,733
Oh, yeah, I get it.
Yeah. Yeah. What?
1500
01:31:29,818 --> 01:31:34,238
Oh, man. My thinking about this
case has become very uptight.
1501
01:31:34,322 --> 01:31:35,823
Yeah.
1502
01:31:35,907 --> 01:31:37,241
Your father.
1503
01:31:38,243 --> 01:31:41,245
Jeffrey, what are
you talking about?
1504
01:31:43,248 --> 01:31:44,248
Jeffrey!
1505
01:31:44,332 --> 01:31:47,126
Walter, if you're there, pick
up the fucking phone, man.
1506
01:31:47,210 --> 01:31:49,211
Come on, Walter.
1507
01:31:49,296 --> 01:31:52,506
Pick it up, man.
This is an emergency. Dude? Dude?
1508
01:31:52,591 --> 01:31:56,552
Yeah. Listen, Walter. I'm at my place.
I need you to come pick me up.
1509
01:31:56,636 --> 01:31:59,013
I can't drive, Dude.
It's Erev shabbos. What?
1510
01:31:59,097 --> 01:32:00,514
Erev shabbos.
What?
1511
01:32:00,599 --> 01:32:03,767
Erev shabbos. I can't drive.
Man!
1512
01:32:03,852 --> 01:32:06,478
I'm not even supposed to pick up the
phone unless it's an emergency.
1513
01:32:06,563 --> 01:32:09,940
This is a fucking emergency!
l understand.
1514
01:32:10,025 --> 01:32:11,609
That's why I picked up
the phone.
1515
01:32:11,693 --> 01:32:14,987
Walter, you fuck.
We gotta go to Pasadena, man.
1516
01:32:15,071 --> 01:32:17,323
Come pick me up or I'm off
the fucking bowling team.
1517
01:32:32,964 --> 01:32:35,424
Get out of that
fucking car, man!
1518
01:32:36,718 --> 01:32:38,761
Get out of that fucking car!
1519
01:32:38,845 --> 01:32:41,138
Get the fuck
out of the car, man.
1520
01:32:43,141 --> 01:32:45,142
Get out of the fucking. ..
1521
01:32:45,727 --> 01:32:47,561
Who the fuck are you, man?
Easy, man!
1522
01:32:47,646 --> 01:32:49,021
Relax, man.
1523
01:32:50,106 --> 01:32:51,774
No physical harm intended.
1524
01:32:51,858 --> 01:32:54,568
Who the fuck are you?
Why you following me around?
1525
01:32:54,694 --> 01:32:57,863
Come on, fuckhead! Relax, man.
I'm a brother shamus.
1526
01:32:58,865 --> 01:33:00,407
Brother Shamus?
1527
01:33:02,160 --> 01:33:03,827
Like an Irish monk?
1528
01:33:03,912 --> 01:33:05,788
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1529
01:33:05,872 --> 01:33:09,833
My name is Da Fino.
I'm a private snoop, like you, man.
1530
01:33:11,127 --> 01:33:13,170
What?
A dick, man.
1531
01:33:13,255 --> 01:33:16,382
And let me tell you something,
I dig your work.
1532
01:33:16,466 --> 01:33:19,426
Playing one side against the
other, in bed with everybody.
1533
01:33:19,511 --> 01:33:21,887
Fabulous stuff, man.
I'm not. ..
1534
01:33:21,972 --> 01:33:24,890
Fuck it, man. Just stay away
from my fucking lady friend.
1535
01:33:24,975 --> 01:33:27,518
Hey, I'm not messing
with your special lady.
1536
01:33:27,602 --> 01:33:30,104
She's not my special lady.
She's my fucking lady friend.
1537
01:33:30,230 --> 01:33:32,982
I'm just helping her conceive, man!
Hey, man. I'm not. ..
1538
01:33:33,066 --> 01:33:35,526
Who are you working for?
Lebowski?
1539
01:33:35,610 --> 01:33:37,027
Jackie Treehorn?
1540
01:33:38,863 --> 01:33:40,364
The Kneutsons.
1541
01:33:41,741 --> 01:33:44,368
Who the fuck are
the Kneutsons?
1542
01:33:44,452 --> 01:33:48,038
The Kneutsons, it's a
wandering daughter job.
1543
01:33:49,416 --> 01:33:51,959
Bunny Lebowski, man.
1544
01:33:52,043 --> 01:33:54,837
Her real name
is Fawn Kneutson.
1545
01:33:54,921 --> 01:33:56,880
Her parents
want her back, see?
1546
01:33:58,049 --> 01:34:00,009
Jesus fucking Christ.
1547
01:34:00,093 --> 01:34:03,012
Crazy, huh?
Ran away about a year ago.
1548
01:34:03,096 --> 01:34:06,807
The Kneutsons told me I should
show her this when I found her.
1549
01:34:06,891 --> 01:34:10,436
It's the family farm.
It's outside Moorhead, Minnesota.
1550
01:34:10,562 --> 01:34:13,647
They think it'll make her homesick.
Oh, boy.
1551
01:34:13,732 --> 01:34:15,357
How are you gonna keep them
down on the farm
1552
01:34:15,442 --> 01:34:17,401
once they've seen
Karl Hungus?
1553
01:34:18,028 --> 01:34:20,529
She's been kidnapped, Da Fino.
Oh, man.
1554
01:34:20,613 --> 01:34:21,822
Or I don't know.
Maybe not.
1555
01:34:21,906 --> 01:34:23,490
But she's definitely
not around.
1556
01:34:23,575 --> 01:34:27,494
Hey, maybe you and me
could pool our resources,
1557
01:34:27,912 --> 01:34:29,747
trade information.
1558
01:34:29,873 --> 01:34:31,665
Professional courtesy?
1559
01:34:32,250 --> 01:34:33,334
Compeers.
You know what I mean?
1560
01:34:33,418 --> 01:34:35,961
Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Fuck off, Da Fino.
1561
01:34:36,046 --> 01:34:38,172
And stay away
from my special. ..
1562
01:34:38,256 --> 01:34:41,175
From my fucking
lady friend, man!
1563
01:34:43,762 --> 01:34:45,679
The lingonberry pancake.
1564
01:34:50,185 --> 01:34:52,311
Lingonberry pancakes.
1565
01:34:55,940 --> 01:34:57,775
Three pigs in blanket.
1566
01:35:03,782 --> 01:35:05,657
She has
lingonberry pancakes.
1567
01:35:14,417 --> 01:35:17,711
I mean, we totally fucked it up, man.
We fucked up his payoff.
1568
01:35:17,796 --> 01:35:20,005
We got the kidnappers
all pissed off.
1569
01:35:20,090 --> 01:35:22,341
And Lebowski, you know,
he yelled at me a lot,
1570
01:35:22,425 --> 01:35:24,551
but he didn't do
anything, huh?
1571
01:35:24,677 --> 01:35:26,887
Well, sometimes it's a cathartic.
.. No, no.
1572
01:35:26,971 --> 01:35:29,264
I'm saying that
if he knows I'm a fuckup,
1573
01:35:29,349 --> 01:35:31,725
why does he leave me in charge
of getting his wife back?
1574
01:35:31,810 --> 01:35:35,145
Because he doesn't
fucking want her back, man.
1575
01:35:35,230 --> 01:35:38,399
He's had enough. He no longer digs her.
it's all a show.
1576
01:35:38,483 --> 01:35:42,903
Okay, but then why doesn't he give
a shit about his million bucks?
1577
01:35:42,987 --> 01:35:45,656
I mean, he knows we never
handed off his briefcase,
1578
01:35:45,824 --> 01:35:47,825
but he never asked
for it back.
1579
01:35:47,909 --> 01:35:50,994
The million bucks
was never in the briefcase.
1580
01:35:51,663 --> 01:35:54,706
The briefcase was
fucking empty, man.
1581
01:35:54,791 --> 01:35:57,459
The asshole was hoping
that they would kill her.
1582
01:35:57,544 --> 01:36:00,087
You threw out a ringer
for a ringer.
1583
01:36:00,171 --> 01:36:03,924
Okay, but how does all this
add up to an emergency?
1584
01:36:04,008 --> 01:36:08,220
I'm saying, I see what you're getting at, Dude.
He kept the money.
1585
01:36:08,304 --> 01:36:10,139
My point is. ..
1586
01:36:10,223 --> 01:36:13,434
Here we are, it's shabbos,
the Sabbath,
1587
01:36:13,518 --> 01:36:17,563
which I'm allowed to break only if
it's a matter of life or death.
1588
01:36:17,647 --> 01:36:20,983
Will you come off it, Walter?
You're not even fucking Jewish, man.
1589
01:36:21,067 --> 01:36:22,734
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1590
01:36:22,819 --> 01:36:24,194
Man, you're fucking
Polish Catholic!
1591
01:36:24,279 --> 01:36:25,904
What the fuck
are you talking about?
1592
01:36:25,989 --> 01:36:28,115
I converted when I married Cynthia.
Come on, Dude.
1593
01:36:28,199 --> 01:36:30,200
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know this.
1594
01:36:30,285 --> 01:36:32,536
And five fucking years ago,
you were divorced.
1595
01:36:32,620 --> 01:36:34,121
So what are you saying?
When you get divorced,
1596
01:36:34,205 --> 01:36:36,331
you turn in your library card?
You get a new license?
1597
01:36:36,416 --> 01:36:39,501
You stop being Jewish?
This is the driveway.
1598
01:36:39,586 --> 01:36:41,628
Jewish as fucking Tevye.
Man.
1599
01:36:41,713 --> 01:36:45,966
You know, it's all a part
of your sick Cynthia thing.
1600
01:36:46,050 --> 01:36:49,970
Man, taking care of her fucking dog,
going to her fucking synagogue.
1601
01:36:50,054 --> 01:36:51,889
You're living in
the fucking past.
1602
01:36:51,973 --> 01:36:55,309
Three thousand years of beautiful
tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax.
1603
01:36:55,393 --> 01:36:58,353
You're goddamn right I'm
living in the fucking past!
1604
01:36:58,438 --> 01:37:00,564
I've. . . Jesus.
1605
01:37:01,816 --> 01:37:03,734
What the hell happened?
1606
01:37:04,652 --> 01:37:07,488
So viva Las Vegas
1607
01:37:08,907 --> 01:37:11,825
Viva Las Vegas
1608
01:37:16,748 --> 01:37:18,749
Let's go. Fuck it.
1609
01:37:23,087 --> 01:37:24,505
Where was she, man?
1610
01:37:24,589 --> 01:37:26,590
Visiting friends of hers
in Palm Springs.
1611
01:37:26,674 --> 01:37:29,092
She just picked up and left,
never bothered to tell us.
1612
01:37:29,177 --> 01:37:31,678
Well, I guess the fucking
nihilists knew where she was.
1613
01:37:31,763 --> 01:37:33,931
Jesus, Dude. She never
even kidnapped herself.
1614
01:37:34,057 --> 01:37:37,392
Who is this gentleman, Dude?
Who am I? I'm a fucking veteran.
1615
01:37:37,477 --> 01:37:38,685
Come on!
That's who I am.
1616
01:37:38,770 --> 01:37:41,313
You shouldn't go in there, Dude.
He's very angry.
1617
01:37:43,650 --> 01:37:45,025
So, man.
1618
01:37:45,109 --> 01:37:48,904
So? She's back,
no thanks to you.
1619
01:37:48,988 --> 01:37:51,365
Where's the fucking money,
Lebowski?
1620
01:37:51,449 --> 01:37:54,785
A million bucks from fucking,
needy, little Urban Achievers!
1621
01:37:54,869 --> 01:37:56,370
You are scum, man!
1622
01:37:56,454 --> 01:37:58,705
Who the hell is he?
Who am I? Who am I?
1623
01:37:58,790 --> 01:38:00,374
Walter. I'm the guy that's
gonna kick your phony,
1624
01:38:00,458 --> 01:38:01,792
gold-bricking ass, that's who I am.
Man.
1625
01:38:01,876 --> 01:38:03,710
We know the briefcase
was fucking empty.
1626
01:38:03,795 --> 01:38:05,837
We know you kept the million
bucks for yourself.
1627
01:38:05,922 --> 01:38:07,506
You have your story,
I have mine.
1628
01:38:07,590 --> 01:38:10,884
I say I entrusted the money
to you and you stole it.
1629
01:38:10,969 --> 01:38:14,179
As if we would ever dream of
taking your bullshit money!
1630
01:38:14,264 --> 01:38:16,473
You thought that Bunny
had been kidnapped,
1631
01:38:16,558 --> 01:38:18,141
and you were
fucking glad, man.
1632
01:38:18,226 --> 01:38:20,477
You could use it as an excuse
to make some money disappear.
1633
01:38:20,562 --> 01:38:23,855
All you needed was a sap to pin it on.
You just met me.
1634
01:38:23,940 --> 01:38:26,858
You. . . You human paraquat.
1635
01:38:26,943 --> 01:38:30,404
You figured, "Oh, here's a
loser, you know, a deadbeat.
1636
01:38:30,488 --> 01:38:33,073
"Somebody this square community
won't give a shit about."
1637
01:38:33,157 --> 01:38:34,741
Well, aren't you?
1638
01:38:35,994 --> 01:38:39,746
Well, yeah, but. ..
Get out, both of you.
1639
01:38:39,831 --> 01:38:43,083
Look at that fucking phony, Dude,
pretending to be a fucking millionaire.
1640
01:38:43,167 --> 01:38:45,460
Out of this house now,
you bums!
1641
01:38:45,545 --> 01:38:47,129
Let me tell you
something else.
1642
01:38:47,213 --> 01:38:50,966
I've seen a lot of spinals,
Dude, and this guy's a fake.
1643
01:38:51,676 --> 01:38:54,845
A fucking gold-bricker.
Stay away from me, mister!
1644
01:38:54,929 --> 01:38:56,597
This guy fucking walks.
1645
01:38:56,681 --> 01:38:59,016
I've never been more certain
of anything in my life.
1646
01:38:59,100 --> 01:39:00,267
You stay away from me!
1647
01:39:00,351 --> 01:39:02,728
Walter, for Christ's sake,
man ! He's a cripple.
1648
01:39:02,854 --> 01:39:04,646
I said ! Get away from me!
Come on. Come on.
1649
01:39:08,276 --> 01:39:11,945
Yeah, I'll put him down, Dude.
Walk! Achtung, baby!
1650
01:39:29,213 --> 01:39:32,341
Come on, man. Help me
put him back in his chair.
1651
01:39:36,262 --> 01:39:38,263
At least they had the
fucking decency to tell us
1652
01:39:38,348 --> 01:39:40,724
that we were fighting
the communists.
1653
01:39:43,227 --> 01:39:46,647
Whereas this whole fucking thing,
this whole fucking thing
1654
01:39:46,731 --> 01:39:49,566
is nothing about nothing,
about oil,
1655
01:39:49,651 --> 01:39:51,985
which is what I personally
hear, Dude.
1656
01:39:52,070 --> 01:39:54,363
Sure you'll see
some tank battles,
1657
01:39:54,447 --> 01:39:57,991
but fighting in desert is very different
from fighting in canopy jungle.
1658
01:39:59,077 --> 01:40:02,496
I mean, Nam was a foot soldier's
war, whereas this thing should. ..
1659
01:40:03,456 --> 01:40:05,707
You know, should be
a piece of cake.
1660
01:40:05,792 --> 01:40:09,211
I mean, I had an M1 6, Jacko,
not an Abrams fucking tank.
1661
01:40:09,337 --> 01:40:12,714
Me and Charlie, eyeball to eyeball.
Yeah.
1662
01:40:12,799 --> 01:40:15,133
That's fucking combat.
1663
01:40:15,218 --> 01:40:18,095
The man in the black
pajamas, Dude.
1664
01:40:18,179 --> 01:40:20,055
Worthy fucking adversary.
1665
01:40:20,139 --> 01:40:23,558
Who's in pajamas, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
1666
01:40:23,643 --> 01:40:25,852
Whereas what we have here,
1667
01:40:25,937 --> 01:40:28,105
a bunch of fig eaters wearing
towels on their head,
1668
01:40:28,189 --> 01:40:30,357
trying to find reverse
on a Soviet tank.
1669
01:40:31,234 --> 01:40:33,402
This is not a worthy
fucking adversary. Hey!
1670
01:40:33,486 --> 01:40:35,529
What's this
day-of-rest shit?
1671
01:40:35,613 --> 01:40:37,197
What's this bullshit?
1672
01:40:37,281 --> 01:40:40,325
I don't fucking care!
It don't matter to Jesus.
1673
01:40:40,410 --> 01:40:41,868
But you not fooling me,
man.
1674
01:40:41,953 --> 01:40:44,663
You might fool the fucks
in the league office
1675
01:40:44,747 --> 01:40:47,040
but you don't fool Jesus.
1676
01:40:47,208 --> 01:40:49,918
It's Bush league
psych-out stuff.
1677
01:40:50,002 --> 01:40:51,420
Laughable, man!
1678
01:40:52,588 --> 01:40:55,674
I would've fucked you
in the ass Saturday.
1679
01:40:56,426 --> 01:40:59,344
I'll fuck you in the ass
next Wednesday instead.
1680
01:41:00,805 --> 01:41:03,265
You got a date
Wednesday, baby!
1681
01:41:08,146 --> 01:41:09,312
He's cracking.
1682
01:41:09,397 --> 01:41:11,106
. . .the whole concept of age.
1683
01:41:11,190 --> 01:41:13,400
I mean, many learned men
have disputed this
1684
01:41:13,484 --> 01:41:16,319
but in the 1 4th century,
the Rambam. ..
1685
01:41:26,330 --> 01:41:28,540
Well, they finally
did it.
1686
01:41:28,624 --> 01:41:30,751
They killed
my fucking car.
1687
01:41:30,835 --> 01:41:34,421
We want the money,
Lebowski.
1688
01:41:34,505 --> 01:41:37,007
Ja. Otherwise,
we kill the girl.
1689
01:41:37,091 --> 01:41:40,594
Ja. It seems you have forgotten
our little deal, Lebowski.
1690
01:41:40,678 --> 01:41:43,430
You don't have the
fucking girl, dipshit.
1691
01:41:43,514 --> 01:41:45,766
We know you never did.
1692
01:41:45,850 --> 01:41:47,434
Are these the Nazis,
Walter?
1693
01:41:47,518 --> 01:41:49,227
No, Donny.
These men are nihilists.
1694
01:41:49,312 --> 01:41:50,729
There's nothing
to be afraid of.
1695
01:41:52,398 --> 01:41:53,482
We don't care.
1696
01:41:53,566 --> 01:41:58,028
We still want the money,
Lebowski, or we fuck you up.
1697
01:41:58,112 --> 01:42:00,781
Fuck you. Fuck the three of you.
Cool it, Walter.
1698
01:42:00,865 --> 01:42:04,701
No. Without a hostage,
there is no ransom.
1699
01:42:04,786 --> 01:42:08,121
That's what ransom is.
Those are the fucking rules.
1700
01:42:08,206 --> 01:42:10,540
His girlfriend
gave up her toe.
1701
01:42:10,625 --> 01:42:12,959
She thought we could
get $1 million.
1702
01:42:13,044 --> 01:42:15,545
It's not fair.
Fair?
1703
01:42:15,630 --> 01:42:19,257
Who's the fucking nihilists around
here, you bunch of fucking crybabies?
1704
01:42:19,342 --> 01:42:21,718
Cool it, Walter.
Hey, look, pal.
1705
01:42:21,803 --> 01:42:23,512
There never
was any money.
1706
01:42:23,596 --> 01:42:25,722
The big Lebowski gave me
an empty briefcase,
1707
01:42:25,807 --> 01:42:27,849
so take it up with him, man.
1708
01:42:27,934 --> 01:42:30,477
And I would like
my undies back.
1709
01:42:30,561 --> 01:42:31,770
Are these guys gonna
hurt us, Walter?
1710
01:42:31,854 --> 01:42:34,314
No, Donny.
These men are cowards.
1711
01:42:34,398 --> 01:42:35,690
Okay!
1712
01:42:35,775 --> 01:42:39,319
So we takes the money you have
on you, and we calls it even.
1713
01:42:40,738 --> 01:42:42,781
Fuck you.
Hey, no. Come on, Walter.
1714
01:42:42,865 --> 01:42:44,866
Come on, we're ending
this thing cheap, man.
1715
01:42:44,951 --> 01:42:47,536
No. What's mine is mine.
No, come on, Walter.
1716
01:42:47,620 --> 01:42:49,830
No funny stuff.
All right. All right.
1717
01:42:49,914 --> 01:42:54,668
No funny stuff.
I got 4 bucks, almost 5.
1718
01:42:54,752 --> 01:42:57,337
1719
01:42:57,421 --> 01:43:00,549
We fuck you up, man!
We takes the money!
1720
01:43:01,092 --> 01:43:02,425
Come and get it.
1721
01:43:03,761 --> 01:43:08,014
We fuck you up!
Show me what you got, nihilists.
1722
01:43:08,099 --> 01:43:10,559
I fuck you! Walter, come on.
He's got a sword.
1723
01:43:10,643 --> 01:43:12,853
Fucking dipshit with
a nine-toed woman!
1724
01:43:12,937 --> 01:43:16,773
I fuck you ! Fuck you!
I fuck you!
1725
01:43:22,947 --> 01:43:24,614
Take it easy, man.
I fuck you!
1726
01:43:24,699 --> 01:43:26,616
Take the $4.
I fuck you!
1727
01:43:30,955 --> 01:43:31,997
I fuck you!
1728
01:43:32,081 --> 01:43:33,957
I'm gonna hit you with
the fucking ball, man.
1729
01:43:38,713 --> 01:43:40,839
Hey, dickhead!
Anti-Semite.
1730
01:43:41,799 --> 01:43:44,509
I fuck you in the ass!
I fuck you in the ass!
1731
01:43:44,594 --> 01:43:49,806
I fuck you ! I fuck you!
1732
01:43:56,063 --> 01:43:58,023
We got a man down, Dude!
1733
01:44:01,736 --> 01:44:02,944
Oh, God. They shot him, man.
1734
01:44:03,029 --> 01:44:05,238
He's not shot. No, Dude.
Are you shot, Donny?
1735
01:44:05,364 --> 01:44:07,657
There weren't any shots fired.
Huh?
1736
01:44:07,742 --> 01:44:10,994
It's a heart attack.
Call the medics, Dude.
1737
01:44:11,537 --> 01:44:14,372
I'd go myself, but I'm pumping
blood, might pass out.
1738
01:44:14,457 --> 01:44:17,751
Rest easy, good buddy.
You're doing fine.
1739
01:44:17,835 --> 01:44:20,253
We got help choppering in.
1740
01:44:47,782 --> 01:44:49,449
Hello, gentlemen.
1741
01:44:49,533 --> 01:44:51,785
You are the bereaved?
Yeah, man.
1742
01:44:52,453 --> 01:44:55,121
Francis Donnelly,
pleased to meet you.
1743
01:44:55,206 --> 01:44:57,499
Jeff Lebowski.
Walter Sobchak.
1744
01:44:57,583 --> 01:44:59,834
The Dude actually is. ..
1745
01:45:00,878 --> 01:45:02,796
Excuse me?
Oh, nothing.
1746
01:45:04,632 --> 01:45:09,302
Yes. I understand you're
taking away the remains?
1747
01:45:09,387 --> 01:45:10,553
Yeah.
1748
01:45:11,305 --> 01:45:13,098
We have the urn.
1749
01:45:14,475 --> 01:45:16,685
I assume this is credit card?
1750
01:45:17,895 --> 01:45:18,979
Yeah.
1751
01:45:33,661 --> 01:45:35,078
What's this?
1752
01:45:35,830 --> 01:45:37,497
Now, that's for the urn.
1753
01:45:37,581 --> 01:45:39,582
Don't need it.
We're scattering the ashes.
1754
01:45:40,376 --> 01:45:43,003
Yes. So we were informed.
1755
01:45:43,087 --> 01:45:46,840
However, we must, of course,
transmit the remains to you
1756
01:45:46,924 --> 01:45:48,508
in a receptacle.
1757
01:45:49,760 --> 01:45:51,553
That's $1 80.
1758
01:45:51,887 --> 01:45:55,807
It is our most modestly
priced receptacle.
1759
01:45:56,142 --> 01:45:58,309
Well, can't we just. ..
$1 80?
1760
01:45:58,394 --> 01:46:00,395
They range up to $3,000.
1761
01:46:01,188 --> 01:46:04,315
We're. .. Can't we just
rent it from you, you know?
1762
01:46:04,400 --> 01:46:07,193
Sir, this is a mortuary
not a rental house.
1763
01:46:07,319 --> 01:46:09,654
We're scattering the fucking ashes!
Walter, Walter.
1764
01:46:09,739 --> 01:46:12,240
Just because we're bereaved
doesn't make us saps.
1765
01:46:12,324 --> 01:46:14,701
Sir, please lower
your voices.
1766
01:46:14,785 --> 01:46:18,872
Man, don't you have, you know,
something else we can put him in?
1767
01:46:18,956 --> 01:46:19,998
You know?
1768
01:46:20,082 --> 01:46:23,126
That is our most modestly
priced receptacle.
1769
01:46:23,419 --> 01:46:25,003
God damn it!
1770
01:46:27,131 --> 01:46:28,798
Is there a Ralph's
around here?
1771
01:46:55,826 --> 01:46:58,495
Donny was a good bowler
and a good man.
1772
01:46:59,747 --> 01:47:01,873
He was one of us.
1773
01:47:01,957 --> 01:47:05,877
He was a man who loved
the outdoors and bowling.
1774
01:47:06,003 --> 01:47:09,756
And as a surfer he explored the
beaches of Southern California
1775
01:47:09,840 --> 01:47:12,634
from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo
1776
01:47:12,718 --> 01:47:15,303
and up to Pismo.
1777
01:47:16,097 --> 01:47:17,347
He died. ..
1778
01:47:18,349 --> 01:47:22,435
He died as so many young men of
his generation, before his time.
1779
01:47:22,520 --> 01:47:25,688
In your wisdom, Lord,
you took him,
1780
01:47:25,815 --> 01:47:29,109
as you took so many bright,
flowering young men
1781
01:47:29,193 --> 01:47:32,028
at Khe Sanh, at Lan Doc,
1782
01:47:32,113 --> 01:47:33,863
at Hill 364.
1783
01:47:35,157 --> 01:47:37,534
These young men
gave their lives,
1784
01:47:38,119 --> 01:47:39,577
and so did Donny.
1785
01:47:41,705 --> 01:47:43,706
Donny, who loved bowling.
1786
01:47:46,752 --> 01:47:47,752
And so,
1787
01:47:49,380 --> 01:47:51,756
Theodore Donald Kerabatsos,
1788
01:47:53,050 --> 01:47:58,179
in accordance with what we think your
dying wishes might well have been,
1789
01:47:59,515 --> 01:48:02,308
we commit your final
mortal remains
1790
01:48:03,227 --> 01:48:05,603
to the bosom of
the Pacific Ocean
1791
01:48:07,064 --> 01:48:09,065
which you loved so well.
1792
01:48:11,402 --> 01:48:13,486
Good night, sweet prince.
1793
01:48:28,627 --> 01:48:30,044
Shit.
1794
01:48:31,964 --> 01:48:34,007
Oh, shit, Dude. I'm sorry.
1795
01:48:35,801 --> 01:48:38,928
Goddamn wind.
Fuck, god damn it, Walter!
1796
01:48:39,013 --> 01:48:41,306
You fucking asshole!
Shit, Dude. I'm sorry.
1797
01:48:41,390 --> 01:48:43,600
Everything's a fucking
travesty with you, man!
1798
01:48:43,684 --> 01:48:45,268
I'm sorry.
It was an accident.
1799
01:48:45,352 --> 01:48:47,854
What was that shit about Vietnam?
Dude, I'm sorry.
1800
01:48:47,938 --> 01:48:50,231
What the fuck does anything
have to do with Vietnam?
1801
01:48:50,316 --> 01:48:52,317
Dude, I'm sorry.
What the fuck are you talking about?
1802
01:48:52,401 --> 01:48:53,985
Dude, I'm sorry.
1803
01:48:56,906 --> 01:48:58,114
Fucking. ..
1804
01:49:05,122 --> 01:49:06,581
Fuck, Walter.
1805
01:49:08,459 --> 01:49:09,959
Come on, Dude.
1806
01:49:10,794 --> 01:49:12,462
Hey, fuck it, man.
1807
01:49:16,383 --> 01:49:18,009
Let's go bowling.
1808
01:49:41,492 --> 01:49:44,827
And when you're sittin' there
1809
01:49:45,454 --> 01:49:48,581
In your silk upholstered chair
1810
01:49:50,084 --> 01:49:54,128
Talkin' to some rich folks
that you know
1811
01:49:57,466 --> 01:50:00,301
Well, I hope you don't see me
1812
01:50:01,303 --> 01:50:04,514
In my ragged company
1813
01:50:05,307 --> 01:50:10,353
Oh, but you know
l could never be alone
1814
01:50:12,523 --> 01:50:15,525
Two oat sodas, Gary.
Right. Good luck tomorrow.
1815
01:50:15,609 --> 01:50:19,070
Yeah, thanks, man.
I was sorry to hear about Donny.
1816
01:50:19,154 --> 01:50:22,031
Oh, yeah. Well, you know,
1817
01:50:22,866 --> 01:50:26,828
sometimes you eat the bear,
and sometimes, you know. ..
1818
01:50:26,912 --> 01:50:28,204
Hey, man.
1819
01:50:28,998 --> 01:50:32,166
How do you do, Dude?
I wondered if I'd see you again.
1820
01:50:32,251 --> 01:50:34,294
I wouldn't miss
the semis.
1821
01:50:34,378 --> 01:50:36,004
Oh, yeah?
How's things been going?
1822
01:50:36,088 --> 01:50:39,215
Well, you know, strikes and
gutters, ups and downs.
1823
01:50:39,300 --> 01:50:42,010
Sure. I got you.
Yeah.
1824
01:50:43,554 --> 01:50:44,595
Thanks, Gary.
1825
01:50:44,680 --> 01:50:47,015
Well, take care, man.
Gotta get back.
1826
01:50:47,099 --> 01:50:50,143
Sure. Take it easy, Dude.
Oh, yeah.
1827
01:50:50,227 --> 01:50:52,312
I know that you will.
1828
01:50:52,396 --> 01:50:55,732
Yeah. Well,
the Dude abides.
1829
01:50:59,737 --> 01:51:00,945
Walter.
1830
01:51:02,656 --> 01:51:04,615
The Dude abides.
1831
01:51:08,537 --> 01:51:11,873
I don't know about you,
but I take comfort in that.
1832
01:51:13,167 --> 01:51:15,376
It's good knowing
he's out there,
1833
01:51:15,461 --> 01:51:19,547
the Dude, taking her easy
for all us sinners.
1834
01:51:22,259 --> 01:51:24,427
I sure hope
he makes the finals.
1835
01:51:26,055 --> 01:51:28,181
Well, that about does her.
1836
01:51:28,265 --> 01:51:29,766
Wraps her all up.
1837
01:51:31,352 --> 01:51:34,812
Things seem to have worked out
pretty good for the Dude and Walter.
1838
01:51:35,481 --> 01:51:38,775
And it was a pretty good
story, don't you think?
1839
01:51:39,610 --> 01:51:41,944
Made me laugh
to beat the band.
1840
01:51:42,613 --> 01:51:44,072
Parts anyway.
1841
01:51:45,616 --> 01:51:47,784
I didn't like seeing Donny go.
1842
01:51:48,911 --> 01:51:53,956
But then I happen to know that there's
a little Lebowski on the way.
1843
01:51:55,626 --> 01:51:58,961
I guess that's the way the whole
darned human comedy keeps
1844
01:51:59,505 --> 01:52:01,839
perpetuating itself
1845
01:52:01,924 --> 01:52:04,092
down through the generations.
1846
01:52:04,593 --> 01:52:08,846
Westward the wagons, across the
sands of time until we. ..
1847
01:52:10,057 --> 01:52:13,267
Oh, look at me.
I'm rambling again.
1848
01:52:14,645 --> 01:52:17,146
Well, I hope you folks
enjoyed yourselves.
1849
01:52:17,648 --> 01:52:19,982
Catch you later on
down the trail.
1850
01:52:21,151 --> 01:52:24,278
Say, friend, you got any more
of that good sarsaparilla?
1851
01:52:47,219 --> 01:52:51,222
Take me down, little Susie
1852
01:52:51,306 --> 01:52:53,141
Take me down
1853
01:52:56,437 --> 01:52:58,938
I know you think
you're the queen
1854
01:52:59,022 --> 01:53:01,149
Of the underground
1855
01:53:04,862 --> 01:53:09,824
Send me dead flowers
every morning
1856
01:53:13,203 --> 01:53:17,707
Send me dead flowers
by the mail
1857
01:53:21,503 --> 01:53:25,965
Send me dead flowers
to my wedding
1858
01:53:28,510 --> 01:53:35,475
And I won't forget to put
roses on your grave
1859
01:53:36,768 --> 01:53:41,105
No, I won't forget
to put roses
1860
01:53:41,190 --> 01:53:45,485
On your grave
1861
01:54:10,594 --> 01:54:15,139
Bright light city
gonna set my soul
1862
01:54:15,599 --> 01:54:19,310
Gonna set my soul on fire
1863
01:54:20,646 --> 01:54:25,775
Got a whole lot of money
that's ready to burn
1864
01:54:25,859 --> 01:54:29,487
So get those stakes up higher
1865
01:54:31,073 --> 01:54:35,826
There's a thousand pretty
women livin' out there
1866
01:54:36,578 --> 01:54:41,666
They're all livin'
devil may care
1867
01:54:41,750 --> 01:54:46,212
And I'm just a devil
with love to spare
1868
01:54:46,296 --> 01:54:50,550
So viva Las Vegas
1869
01:54:52,094 --> 01:54:56,138
Viva Las Vegas
1870
01:54:59,851 --> 01:55:04,522
Viva Las Vegas
with your neon flashing
1871
01:55:04,606 --> 01:55:07,567
And your one-arm
bandits crashing
1872
01:55:07,651 --> 01:55:11,237
All those hopes down the drain
1873
01:55:12,823 --> 01:55:17,994
Viva Las Vegas turnin'
day into nighttime
1874
01:55:18,078 --> 01:55:20,580
Night into daytime
1875
01:55:20,664 --> 01:55:22,832
If you see it once
1876
01:55:22,916 --> 01:55:29,338
You'll never be the same again
1877
01:55:31,383 --> 01:55:35,845
I'm gonna keep on
keep on runnin'
1878
01:55:35,929 --> 01:55:39,682
if it costs me
my very last dime
1879
01:55:41,184 --> 01:55:43,519
If I wind up broke
1880
01:55:43,604 --> 01:55:45,813
Well, I'll always remember
1881
01:55:45,897 --> 01:55:49,942
That I had a swingin' time
1882
01:55:51,778 --> 01:55:55,865
I'm gonna give it
everything I've got
1883
01:55:56,992 --> 01:56:01,203
Lady Luck, please
let the dice stay hot
1884
01:56:02,122 --> 01:56:06,626
Let me shoot a seven
on every shot
1885
01:56:06,710 --> 01:56:10,921
So viva Las Vegas
1886
01:56:12,466 --> 01:56:14,466
Viva Las Vegas
1887
01:56:22,684 --> 01:56:24,284
Viva
1888
01:56:35,113 --> 01:56:37,113
Las Vegas
1889
01:56:46,249 --> 01:56:49,585
Viva
ビッグ・リボウスキ
00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:37,203
See them tumbling down
2
00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:41,416
Pledging their love
to the ground
3
00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:44,127
Way out West
there was this fella.
4
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:46,546
Fella I wanna tell you about.
5
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:50,091
Fella by the name
of Jeff Lebowski.
6
00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:53,803
Least that was the handle that
his loving parents gave him.
7
00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:56,931
But he never had
much use for it himself.
8
00:00:57,015 --> 00:01:01,060
This Lebowski,
he called himself the Dude.
9
00:01:01,145 --> 00:01:03,229
Now Dude,
10
00:01:03,313 --> 00:01:06,983
that's a name no one would
self-apply where I come from.
11
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:12,447
But then there was a lot about the Dude that
didn't make a whole lot of sense to me,
12
00:01:12,531 --> 00:01:15,199
and a lot about
where he lived likewise.
13
00:01:15,284 --> 00:01:17,452
Drifting along with
the tumbling tumbleweeds
14
00:01:17,536 --> 00:01:19,120
But then again,
15
00:01:19,204 --> 00:01:22,290
maybe that's why I found the
place so darned interesting.
16
00:01:22,374 --> 00:01:24,333
I know when night has gone
17
00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:27,295
That a new world's
born at dawn
18
00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:31,424
They call Los Angeles
the City of Angels.
19
00:01:31,508 --> 00:01:34,552
I didn't find it to be that,
exactly.
20
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:38,347
But I'll allow there are
some nice folks there.
21
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:41,100
Course, l can't say
I seen London,
22
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:43,436
and I never been to France,
23
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:48,566
and l ain't never seen no queen in her
damned undies, as the fella says.
24
00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:50,568
But I'll tell you what,
25
00:01:50,652 --> 00:01:55,948
after seeing Los Angeles and this
here story I'm about to unfold,
26
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:58,868
well, I guess
I've seen something
27
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:03,122
every bit as stupefying as you can
see in any of those other places,
28
00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:05,374
and in English, too.
29
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,377
So l can die with
a smile on my face
30
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:11,255
without feeling like
the good Lord gypped me.
31
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:14,300
Now, this here story
I'm about to unfold
32
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:17,386
took place back
in the early '90s,
33
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:22,308
just about the time of our conflict
with Saddam and the Iraqis.
34
00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:25,978
I only mention it 'cause
sometimes there's a man...
35
00:02:26,063 --> 00:02:28,105
I won't say a hero.
36
00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:30,233
'Cause what's a hero?
37
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,652
But sometimes there's a man...
38
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:35,738
And I'm talking about
the Dude here.
39
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:38,491
Sometimes there's a man...
40
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:43,162
Well, he's the man
for his time and place.
41
00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:45,998
He fits right in there.
42
00:02:46,083 --> 00:02:49,460
And that's the Dude
in Los Angeles.
43
00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:53,172
And even if he is a lazy man,
44
00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:55,883
and the Dude was
most certainly that,
45
00:02:55,968 --> 00:02:59,720
quite possibly the laziest
in Los Angeles county,
46
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:03,683
which would place him high in the
running for laziest worldwide.
47
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,728
But sometimes there's a man...
48
00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:10,606
Sometimes there's a man...
49
00:03:12,067 --> 00:03:15,486
Well, I lost my train
of thought here.
50
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:16,821
But...
51
00:03:17,573 --> 00:03:20,157
Hell, I done introduced him
enough.
52
00:03:20,242 --> 00:03:22,577
...with them all
for a collective action.
53
00:03:22,661 --> 00:03:24,370
This will not stand.
54
00:03:24,454 --> 00:03:27,957
This will not stand, this
aggression against Kuwait.
55
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:34,338
Here on the range I belong
56
00:03:34,423 --> 00:03:36,674
Drifting along
57
00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:39,886
With the tumbling
58
00:03:39,970 --> 00:03:45,391
Tumbleweeds
59
00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:00,948
Where's the money,
Lebowski?
60
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:03,242
I want that money,
Lebowski.
61
00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:05,786
Bunny says you're
good for it.
62
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:11,042
Where's the money,
Lebowski?
63
00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:13,669
Where's the fucking money,
shithead?
64
00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:18,883
It's down there somewhere.
Let me take another look.
65
00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,552
Don't fuck with us.
66
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,806
Your wife owes money
to Jackie Treehorn,
67
00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:28,768
that means you owe money
to Jackie Treehorn.
68
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:31,062
Ever thus to deadbeats,
Lebowski.
69
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:33,731
No, don't do. ..
70
00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:38,152
- Not on the rug, man.
- See?
71
00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:41,572
See what happens, Lebowski?
You see what happens?
72
00:04:41,657 --> 00:04:44,617
Nobody calls me Lebowski.
You got the wrong guy.
73
00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:46,452
I'm the Dude, man.
74
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:49,288
Your name's Lebowski,
Lebowski.
75
00:04:49,373 --> 00:04:51,165
Your wife is Bunny.
76
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,418
My wife? Bunny?
77
00:04:54,503 --> 00:04:56,462
Do you see a wedding ring
on my finger?
78
00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:58,839
Does this place look like
I'm fucking married?
79
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:01,092
The toilet seat's up, man!
80
00:05:09,393 --> 00:05:11,018
What the fuck is this?
81
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:13,312
Obviously you're
not a golfer.
82
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,025
Woo?
Yeah.
83
00:05:18,110 --> 00:05:20,778
Isn't this guy supposed
to be a millionaire?
84
00:05:22,239 --> 00:05:23,364
Fuck.
85
00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:26,575
Yeah. What do you think?
86
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,953
He looks like
a fucking loser.
87
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:31,789
Hey, at least I'm housebroken.
88
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:33,582
Fucking time-waster.
89
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,543
Thanks a lot,
asshole.
90
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:45,428
La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
91
00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:48,848
La-la-la, la, la, la, la
92
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:52,309
La-la-la, la, la, la-la la-la
93
00:05:52,728 --> 00:05:54,478
La, la, la-la
94
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:58,399
La-la-la
95
00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:01,652
La-la-la, la-la-la
96
00:06:01,737 --> 00:06:03,112
La-la, la-la
97
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,159
The man in me will do
98
00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,537
Nearly any task
99
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:15,875
And as for compensation
100
00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:18,461
There's little he would ask
101
00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:21,839
Take a woman like you
102
00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,133
To get through
103
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,719
To the man in me
104
00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:33,350
Storm clouds are raging
105
00:06:33,435 --> 00:06:36,353
All around my door
106
00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,898
I think to myself
107
00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:42,485
I might not take it anymore
108
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:46,197
Take a woman like your kind
109
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:50,493
To find the man in me
110
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:55,915
But, oh
111
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:58,459
What a wonderful feeling
112
00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:04,673
Just to know that you are near
113
00:07:07,511 --> 00:07:11,472
Sets my heart a-reeling
114
00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:15,976
From my toes
115
00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:20,272
Up to my ears
116
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:23,567
The man in me will
hide sometimes
117
00:07:23,652 --> 00:07:26,278
To keep from being seen
118
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:30,241
But that's just because
he doesn't want
119
00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:33,244
To turn into some machine
120
00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:35,746
Take a woman like you
121
00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:38,332
To get through
122
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,292
To the man in me
123
00:07:44,881 --> 00:07:47,758
I'm throwing rocks tonight.
Mark it, Dude.
124
00:07:47,843 --> 00:07:52,346
I'm telling you, this was a valued rug.
This was a. ..
125
00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,974
Yeah, man. It really
tied the room together.
126
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,684
This was
a valued. ..
127
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:58,519
What tied the room together, Dude?
My rug.
128
00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,104
Were you listening to the
Dude's story, Donny?
129
00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:01,272
What?
Walter.
130
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:04,066
Were you listening to the Dude's story?
I was bowling.
131
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:06,402
So you have no frame of
reference here, Donny.
132
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,280
You're like a child who wanders into the
middle of a movie and wants to know. ..
133
00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:12,825
Walter, what's the point, man?
There's no reason, here's my point, Dude.
134
00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:14,535
There's no fucking reason
why these two. ..
135
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:15,786
Yeah, Walter,
what's your point?
136
00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:17,872
Walter, what is the. ..
137
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:20,374
Look, we all know
who is at fault here.
138
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,668
What the fuck are you
talking about? Huh?
139
00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:25,462
No, what the fuck
are you. . . I'm not. ..
140
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:28,340
We're talking about unchecked
aggression here, Dude.
141
00:08:28,466 --> 00:08:30,092
What the fuck is he talking about?
My rug.
142
00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:31,969
Forget it, Donny!
You're out of your element!
143
00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,638
Walter, the Chinaman
who peed on my rug,
144
00:08:34,723 --> 00:08:36,557
I can't go
give him a bill!
145
00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,309
So what the fuck
are you talking about?
146
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:39,518
What the fuck are
you talking about?
147
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,729
The Chinaman is not
the issue here, Dude!
148
00:08:41,813 --> 00:08:44,398
I'm talking about drawing
a line in the sand, Dude.
149
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,901
Across this line
you do not. ..
150
00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:51,071
Also, Dude, "Chinaman" is not
the preferred nomenclature.
151
00:08:51,156 --> 00:08:52,781
Asian-American,
please.
152
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:56,285
Walter, this isn't a guy who built the
railroads here. This is a guy. ..
153
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:57,995
What the fuck
are you. ..
154
00:08:58,121 --> 00:09:01,123
Walter, he peed on my rug!
He peed on the Dude's rug.
155
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,750
Donny, you're out
of your element.
156
00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:06,128
Dude, the Chinaman
is not the issue here.
157
00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:08,631
So, who. ..
Jeff Lebowski.
158
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,842
The other Jeffrey Lebowski.
The millionaire.
159
00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:14,678
That's fucking interesting, man.
That's fucking interesting.
160
00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:18,724
Plus, he has the wealth,
obviously, and the resources,
161
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:21,352
so that there's no reason,
there's no fucking reason
162
00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:24,146
why his wife should go out
and owe money all over town,
163
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:26,690
and then they come and they
pee on your fucking rug!
164
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,025
Am I wrong?
No.
165
00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,652
Am I wrong?
Yeah, but. ..
166
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:30,778
Okay then.
167
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:35,616
That rug really tied the
room together, did it not?
168
00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:37,618
Fucking A.
And this guy peed on it.
169
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,036
Donny, please.
170
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,287
You know, this is
the fucking guy. ..
171
00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:42,665
I could find this
fucking Lebowski guy.
172
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:45,084
His name is Lebowski?
That's your name, Dude.
173
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:49,463
This is the guy who should
compensate me for the fucking rug.
174
00:09:49,547 --> 00:09:53,175
His wife goes out and owes money all
over town, and they pee on my rug?
175
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,302
They pee on
your fucking rug?
176
00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:58,097
Peed on my fucking rug.
That's right, Dude.
177
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:01,850
They peed on
your fucking rug.
178
00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,145
This is the study.
179
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,815
As you can see, the various
commendations, awards. ..
180
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:11,819
"Jeffrey Lebowski." . ..
citations, honorary degrees, et cetera.
181
00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:15,572
Very impressive.
Oh, please feel free to inspect them.
182
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,284
Oh. No, I'm not really. ..
Oh, please. Please.
183
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:20,286
That is the key to
the city of Pasadena,
184
00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:25,749
which Mr. Lebowski received two years ago
in recognition of his various civic. ..
185
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:30,504
Oh ! That's the Los Angeles Chamber
of Commerce Business Achiever Award,
186
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,756
which is given. ..
Oh, not necessarily given every year.
187
00:10:32,841 --> 00:10:33,924
Hey, is this. ..
188
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,259
Given only when there's
a worthy somebody. ..
189
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,635
Is this him with Nancy?
190
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,972
Yes, indeed, that is Mr.
Lebowski with the first lady, yes.
191
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,265
It was taken
when Mrs. Reagan. ..
192
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,976
That's Lebowski
on the left there?
193
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,812
Of course. Mr. Lebowski, on the left.
.. So he's a. ..
194
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,481
You know, a handicapped
kind of guy?
195
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:51,734
Mr. Lebowski is
disabled, yes.
196
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:55,571
This picture was taken when Mrs.
Reagan was first lady of the nation.
197
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:56,739
Yes, yes.
198
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:58,782
Not of California.
Good shot.
199
00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:01,076
In fact, he met privately
with the President,
200
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,912
though, unfortunately, there wasn't
enough time for a photo opportunity.
201
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,956
Oh, Nancy's pretty good.
Oh, wonderful woman.
202
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:08,334
We were very happy to. ..
These are. ..
203
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:11,086
Oh, those are Mr.
Lebowski's children, so to speak.
204
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,421
Different mothers, huh?
205
00:11:12,547 --> 00:11:14,840
No, they're not. ..
Racially, he's pretty cool?
206
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,385
They're not literally
his children.
207
00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:20,721
They're the Little Lebowski
Urban Achievers,
208
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,849
inner city children of promise, but
without the necessary means for. ..
209
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:25,934
Necessary means for
a higher education,
210
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:29,438
so Mr. Lebowski is committed to
sending all of them to college.
211
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,856
Excuse me.
Oh, geez.
212
00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:32,691
Thank you. Thank you.
213
00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:37,279
Far out. Think he's got room for one more?
One. . . Oh.
214
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,157
You never went to college.
215
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:42,326
Please, don't touch that.
Oh, yeah, yeah. No, I did,
216
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:44,703
but, you know,
I spent most of my time
217
00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:47,915
occupying various
administration buildings,
218
00:11:47,999 --> 00:11:49,708
smoking a lot
of Thai stick,
219
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:53,045
breaking into the ROTC
and bowling.
220
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,381
Tell you the truth, Brandt,
I don't remember most of it.
221
00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:04,348
Okay, sir.
You're a Lebowski, I'm a Lebowski.
222
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:06,183
That's terrific.
223
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:09,144
But I am very busy,
as I imagine you are.
224
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:11,897
What can I do for you, sir?
225
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:15,526
Well, sir,
it's this rug I have.
226
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,611
It really tied
the room together.
227
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:20,406
You told Brandt on the phone.
He told me.
228
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,990
Where do I fit in?
229
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:25,911
Well, they were looking
for you, these two guys.
230
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,955
You know, they. ..
I'll say it again.
231
00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:31,166
You told Brandt on the phone.
He told me.
232
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,293
I know what happened.
Yes, yes.
233
00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:36,588
Oh, so you know that they were
trying to piss on your rug.
234
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:38,882
Did I urinate on your rug?
235
00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,218
You mean, did you personally
come and pee on my rug?
236
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,262
Hello! Do you speak
English, sir?
237
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:45,222
¿Parla usted inglés?
238
00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:48,183
I'll ask you again.
Did I urinate on your rug?
239
00:12:49,018 --> 00:12:51,603
No. Like I said,
Woo peed on my rug.
240
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,355
I just want to
understand this, sir.
241
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:57,359
Every time a rug is micturated
upon in this fair city,
242
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:59,194
I have to compensate
the person?
243
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:02,489
Come on, man.
I'm not trying to scam anybody here.
244
00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:04,408
You know, I'm just. ..
245
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:08,036
You're just looking for
a handout like every other. ..
246
00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,665
Are you employed,
Mr. Lebowski?
247
00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:15,085
Wait. Let me explain
something to you.
248
00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:17,004
I am not Mr. Lebowski.
249
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:20,048
You're Mr. Lebowski.
I'm the Dude.
250
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,634
So that's what you call me.
You know?
251
00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:24,803
That or His Dudeness,
252
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:27,347
or Duder or, you know,
253
00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:30,476
El Duderino, if you're not
into the whole brevity thing.
254
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,561
Are you employed, sir?
255
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,230
Employed?
256
00:13:36,399 --> 00:13:41,153
You don't go out looking for a job
dressed like that, do you? On a weekday?
257
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:42,613
Is this a. ..
258
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:45,824
What day is this?
Well, I do work, sir.
259
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:50,078
So, if you don't mind. ..
No, I do mind. The Dude minds.
260
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,914
This will not stand, you know.
261
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,500
This aggression
will not stand, man.
262
00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:56,335
I mean,
your wife owes money. ..
263
00:13:56,419 --> 00:13:59,379
My wife is not
the issue here!
264
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,841
I hope that someday my wife will
learn to live on her allowance,
265
00:14:02,926 --> 00:14:04,343
which is ample.
266
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:07,262
But if she does not, that
is her problem, not mine,
267
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,972
just as the rug
is your problem.
268
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:13,018
Just as every bum's lot in life
is his own responsibility,
269
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,812
regardless of who
he chooses to blame.
270
00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:18,982
I didn't blame anyone
for the loss of my legs.
271
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:21,527
Some Chinaman took them
from me in Korea.
272
00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:24,029
But I went out
and achieved anyway.
273
00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:28,492
I cannot solve your problems, sir.
Only you can.
274
00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,038
Well, fuck it.
Oh, fuck it.
275
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,208
Yes, that's your answer.
That's your answer to everything.
276
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:38,043
Tattoo it on your forehead!
277
00:14:38,127 --> 00:14:40,587
Your revolution is over,
Mr. Lebowski!
278
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:43,924
Condolences! The bums lost!
279
00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:47,219
My advice to you is to do
what your parents did!
280
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,096
Get a job, sir!
281
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:51,723
The bums will
always lose!
282
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,559
Do you hear me,
Lebowski?
283
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:56,061
The bums will
always lose.
284
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,606
How was your meeting,
Mr. Lebowski?
285
00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:01,191
Okay.
286
00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:03,777
The old man told me to take
any rug in the house.
287
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:06,113
Well, enjoy.
288
00:15:06,197 --> 00:15:08,740
And perhaps we'll see you
again sometime, Dude.
289
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:09,950
Yeah, sure.
290
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:12,911
If I'm in the neighborhood,
you know,
291
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,582
and I need to use the john.
292
00:15:27,218 --> 00:15:29,386
Blow on them.
Huh?
293
00:15:29,846 --> 00:15:31,722
Go ahead. Blow.
294
00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:36,852
You want me to blow
on your toes?
295
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,520
Uh-huh.
296
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,023
I can't blow that far.
297
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,281
Are you sure he won't mind?
298
00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:52,451
Uli doesn't care about anything.
He's a nihilist.
299
00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:54,786
Oh, that must be exhausting.
300
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,622
You're not blowing.
301
00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,458
Our guest has to be getting along, Mrs.
Lebowski.
302
00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:00,959
Oh!
303
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,919
You're Bunny.
304
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:06,381
I'll suck your cock
for $1,000.
305
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:12,721
Wonderful woman.
306
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,931
We're all very fond of her.
Very free-spirited.
307
00:16:15,016 --> 00:16:17,726
Brandt can't watch though,
or he has to pay $1 00.
308
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,896
That's marvelous.
309
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:25,901
I'm just gonna go
find a cash machine.
310
00:16:30,531 --> 00:16:32,574
I'm slamming them tonight!
311
00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:34,951
You guys are dead
in the water.
312
00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:37,996
All right!
Way to go, Donny!
313
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:41,416
"If you will it,
it is no dream."
314
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:44,920
Fucking 20 minutes late, man.
What the fuck is that?
315
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:47,005
Theodore Herzl.
Huh?
316
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:50,175
State of Israel.
If you will it, Dude, it is no dream.
317
00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:52,135
What the fuck are you
talking about, man?
318
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:55,097
The carrier.
What's in the fucking carrier? Huh?
319
00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:58,141
Oh ! Cynthia's dog.
Think it's a Pomeranian.
320
00:16:58,226 --> 00:17:00,227
Can't leave him home alone
or he eats the furniture.
321
00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:03,063
I'm watching it while Cynthia and
Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.
322
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,065
You brought a fucking
Pomeranian bowling?
323
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:06,692
What do you mean,
brought it bowling?
324
00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:09,778
I didn't rent it shoes.
I'm not buying it a fucking beer.
325
00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,947
He's not taking your
fucking turn, Dude.
326
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:15,367
Man, if my fucking ex-wife asked
me to take care of her fucking dog
327
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,202
while she and her boyfriend
went to Honolulu,
328
00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:19,871
I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
Why can't she board it?
329
00:17:19,956 --> 00:17:21,790
First of all, Dude,
you don't have an ex.
330
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:25,043
Secondly, this is a fucking
show dog with fucking papers.
331
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:27,838
You can't board it. It gets upset.
Its hair falls out.
332
00:17:27,964 --> 00:17:30,257
Walter. ..
Fucking dog has fucking papers.
333
00:17:30,341 --> 00:17:33,009
Over the line!
Huh?
334
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:35,429
I'm sorry, Smokey.
You were over the line. That's a foul.
335
00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:37,180
Bullshit. Mark it eight, Dude.
336
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:40,392
Excuse me. Mark it zero.
Next frame.
337
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:43,395
Bullshit, Walter.
Mark it eight, Dude.
338
00:17:43,479 --> 00:17:46,064
Smokey, this is not Nam.
This is bowling. There are rules.
339
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:48,900
Hey, Walter, come on.
Hey, man, it's Smokey.
340
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:51,153
So his toe slipped over
a little, you know.
341
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:53,405
It's just a game, man.
This is a league game.
342
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,407
This determines who enters
the next round robin.
343
00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,242
- Am I wrong?
- Yeah, but I wasn't. ..
344
00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:59,870
Am I wrong?
Yeah, but I wasn't over.
345
00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:02,664
Give me the marker, Dude.
I'm marking an eight.
346
00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:04,499
Smokey, my friend,
347
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:08,295
you're entering a world of pain.
Walter, man.
348
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:12,090
You mark that frame an eight,
you're entering a world of pain.
349
00:18:12,175 --> 00:18:14,760
I'm not. ..
A world of pain.
350
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:16,928
Look, Dude,
this is your partner.
351
00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:19,389
Has the whole world
gone crazy?
352
00:18:19,474 --> 00:18:22,225
Am I the only one around here who
gives a shit about the rules?
353
00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:23,560
Mark it zero!
354
00:18:23,644 --> 00:18:25,729
They're calling the cops, man.
Put the piece away.
355
00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:28,899
Mark it zero!
Walter, put the piece away.
356
00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:31,193
Walter. You think I'm
fucking around here?
357
00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:32,903
Mark it zero!
358
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,953
All right. It's fucking zero.
359
00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:44,122
You happy,
you crazy fuck?
360
00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:48,502
It's a league game,
Smokey.
361
00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:51,880
You can't do that, man.
362
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,674
These guys, you know, they're
like me, they're pacifists.
363
00:18:54,759 --> 00:18:57,344
Smokey was a
conscientious objector.
364
00:18:57,428 --> 00:19:00,263
You know, Dude, I myself dabbled
in pacifism at one point.
365
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:01,640
Not in Nam, of course.
366
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:05,185
And you know he's got
emotional problems, man.
367
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:07,687
You mean, beyond pacifism?
368
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:10,482
He's fragile.
He's very fragile.
369
00:19:13,236 --> 00:19:15,070
I did not know that.
370
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:18,031
Well, it's all water
under the bridge.
371
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:21,117
And we do enter
the next round robin.
372
00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:23,495
Am I wrong?
No, you're not wrong.
373
00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,330
Am I wrong?
You're not wrong, Walter.
374
00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:26,790
You're just an asshole.
375
00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:28,333
Okay then.
376
00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:30,043
Play Quintana and
O'Brien next week.
377
00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:32,045
They should be pushovers.
378
00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,674
Man, would you just. ..
379
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:37,509
Just take it easy, man.
380
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:39,886
You know, that's your answer
for everything, Dude.
381
00:19:39,971 --> 00:19:42,848
Let me point out something.
Pacifism is not. ..
382
00:19:42,932 --> 00:19:45,767
Look at our current situation
with that camel fucker in Iraq.
383
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:47,811
Pacifism is not something
to hide behind.
384
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,272
Just take it easy, man.
385
00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:52,732
I'm perfectly calm, Dude.
386
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:56,278
Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Calmer than you are.
387
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,280
Will you just take it easy?
388
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,907
Calmer than you are.
389
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:06,872
Dude, this is Smokey.
390
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,874
Look, I don't wanna be
a hard-on about this,
391
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:10,208
and l know
it wasn't your fault,
392
00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:11,877
but I just thought
it was fair to tell you
393
00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:14,170
that Gilbert and l will be
submitting this to the league
394
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,464
and asking them
to set aside the round.
395
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,217
I don't know,
maybe forfeit it to us.
396
00:20:19,302 --> 00:20:22,554
So, like l say, just thought,
you know, fair warning.
397
00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:24,097
Tell Walter.
398
00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:25,432
I'm sorry.
399
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:29,644
Mr. Lebowski,
this is Brandt at...
400
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:33,189
Well, at Mr. Lebowski's
office.
401
00:20:33,274 --> 00:20:35,775
Please call us
as soon as it's convenient.
402
00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:39,571
Mr. Lebowski,
this is Mel Zelnicker
403
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,114
of the Southern Cal
Bowling League.
404
00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:46,453
I just got an informal report that a
member of your team, a Walter Sobchak,
405
00:20:46,537 --> 00:20:48,788
drew a firearm
during league play.
406
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,457
If this is true, of course,
407
00:20:50,541 --> 00:20:52,250
it contravenes a number of
the league's bylaws
408
00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:54,044
and also article 27
of the league...
409
00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,797
Dude.
Hey, Marty.
410
00:20:57,882 --> 00:20:59,633
Dude, I finally got. ..
411
00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:02,010
I got the venue I wanted.
412
00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:06,014
I'm performing my dance
quintet, you know, my cycle,
413
00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:08,850
at Crane Jackson's Fountain
Street Theater on Tuesday night.
414
00:21:08,935 --> 00:21:13,188
And, well, I'd love it if
you came and gave me notes.
415
00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:15,732
I'll be there, man.
416
00:21:18,027 --> 00:21:20,904
Dude, tomorrow's
already the tenth.
417
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:23,531
Far out.
418
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,328
Oh. Oh, all right. Okay.
419
00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:31,206
Just slip the rent
under my door.
420
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:37,420
...serious infraction
and examine your standing.
421
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,005
Thank you.
422
00:21:40,591 --> 00:21:43,218
Mr. Lebowski, Brandt again.
423
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:46,721
Please do call us as soon as you
get in and I'll send the limo.
424
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:50,392
I hope you're not avoiding
this call because of the rug,
425
00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:53,144
which I assure you
is not a problem.
426
00:21:53,229 --> 00:21:55,855
We need your help, and...
427
00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:59,901
Well, we would very much like to see you.
Thank you. It's Brandt.
428
00:22:01,237 --> 00:22:02,696
We've had some
terrible news.
429
00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:04,990
Mr. Lebowski's in seclusion
in the west wing.
430
00:22:09,453 --> 00:22:10,954
Mr. Lebowski.
431
00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,212
Funny.
432
00:22:20,423 --> 00:22:24,217
I can look back on
a life of achievement,
433
00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:26,511
challenges met,
434
00:22:26,595 --> 00:22:28,638
competitors bested,
435
00:22:28,723 --> 00:22:30,432
obstacles overcome.
436
00:22:32,018 --> 00:22:35,395
I've accomplished
more than most men
437
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,772
and without
the use of my legs.
438
00:22:42,445 --> 00:22:45,238
What makes a man,
Mr. Lebowski?
439
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:47,949
Dude.
Huh?
440
00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:52,662
Oh, I don't know, sir.
441
00:22:52,747 --> 00:22:55,623
Is it being prepared
to do the right thing,
442
00:22:57,752 --> 00:22:59,419
whatever the cost?
443
00:23:00,254 --> 00:23:02,380
Isn't that what
makes a man?
444
00:23:03,507 --> 00:23:06,009
Sure, that and
a pair of testicles.
445
00:23:06,594 --> 00:23:08,386
You're joking,
446
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:12,265
but perhaps you're right.
447
00:23:12,349 --> 00:23:14,267
You mind if I do a Jay?
448
00:23:16,187 --> 00:23:17,353
Bunny.
449
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:20,774
Excuse me?
450
00:23:21,108 --> 00:23:22,650
Bunny Lebowski.
451
00:23:23,778 --> 00:23:25,904
She is the light of my life.
452
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:29,991
Are you surprised
at my tears, sir?
453
00:23:31,911 --> 00:23:33,787
Oh, fucking A.
454
00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:41,002
Strong men also cry.
455
00:23:44,048 --> 00:23:46,508
I received
this fax this morning.
456
00:23:49,470 --> 00:23:53,098
As you can see,
it is a ransom note.
457
00:23:54,058 --> 00:23:56,101
"We have Bunny."
458
00:23:56,185 --> 00:24:00,438
Written by men who were unable to
achieve on a level field of play.
459
00:24:00,523 --> 00:24:03,149
"Gather $1 million..."
460
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:06,653
Cowards! "...
in unmarked, nonconsecutive 20s."
461
00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,447
Weaklings!
"Await instructions."
462
00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:11,324
Bums!
"No funny stuff."
463
00:24:12,409 --> 00:24:14,577
Bummer.
Huh?
464
00:24:15,830 --> 00:24:19,541
This is a bummer, man.
That's. . . That's a bummer.
465
00:24:20,334 --> 00:24:23,044
Brandt will fill you in
on the details.
466
00:24:37,601 --> 00:24:42,355
Mr. Lebowski is prepared to make a
generous offer to you to act as courier
467
00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:44,983
once we get instructions
for the money.
468
00:24:45,067 --> 00:24:46,234
Why me, man?
469
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:51,823
He believes the culprits might be
the very people who soiled your rug
470
00:24:51,907 --> 00:24:56,828
and you are in a unique position to
confirm or disconfirm that suspicion.
471
00:24:56,912 --> 00:24:58,663
He thinks the carpet pissers
did this?
472
00:24:58,747 --> 00:25:00,665
Well, Dude,
we just don't know.
473
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:35,009
Welcome to the
Hotel California
474
00:26:35,886 --> 00:26:37,804
Such a lovely place
475
00:26:37,888 --> 00:26:39,764
Fucking Quintana.
476
00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:43,059
That creep can roll, man.
477
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:46,187
Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude.
Yeah.
478
00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:50,066
No, he's a sex offender
with a record.
479
00:26:50,150 --> 00:26:53,111
He did six months in Chino for
exposing himself to an eight-year-old.
480
00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:56,489
When he moved to Hollywood,
he had to go door-to-door
481
00:26:56,573 --> 00:26:58,366
to tell everyone
he was a pederast.
482
00:26:59,326 --> 00:27:02,829
What's a pederast, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
483
00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:07,750
So, how much
did he give you?
484
00:27:07,835 --> 00:27:11,087
20 grand, man. And, of course,
I still get to keep the rug.
485
00:27:11,213 --> 00:27:12,547
Just for making a hand-off?
Yeah.
486
00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:15,008
They gave Dude a beeper.
487
00:27:16,010 --> 00:27:18,803
So whenever these guys call. ..
What if it's during a game?
488
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:21,514
Oh, I told them if it was
during league play. ..
489
00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:22,724
What's during
league play?
490
00:27:22,808 --> 00:27:25,268
Life does not stop and
start at your convenience,
491
00:27:25,352 --> 00:27:27,270
you miserable
piece of shit.
492
00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:29,314
I figure. ..
What's wrong with Walter, Dude?
493
00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:31,899
I figure it's easy money, you know.
It's all pretty harmless.
494
00:27:31,984 --> 00:27:33,818
She probably
kidnapped herself.
495
00:27:34,778 --> 00:27:37,655
What do you mean, Dude?
Rug-peers did not do this.
496
00:27:37,740 --> 00:27:42,618
Look at it. A young trophy wife
marries this guy for his money.
497
00:27:42,703 --> 00:27:45,538
She figures he isn't giving
her enough, you know.
498
00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:47,373
She owes money
all over town.
499
00:27:47,458 --> 00:27:49,625
That fucking bitch!
500
00:27:49,710 --> 00:27:51,502
It's all a goddamn
fake, man.
501
00:27:51,587 --> 00:27:53,504
It's like Lenin said,
502
00:27:53,589 --> 00:27:58,551
you look for the person who
will benefit and, you know. ..
503
00:27:58,635 --> 00:28:01,262
I Am the Walrus?
You know, you'll. ..
504
00:28:01,930 --> 00:28:03,931
You know what I'm trying to say.
l Am the Walrus.
505
00:28:04,016 --> 00:28:06,809
That fucking bitch!
Oh, yeah!
506
00:28:06,894 --> 00:28:08,311
I Am the Walrus.
That's. ..
507
00:28:08,395 --> 00:28:09,896
Shut the fuck up,
Donny!
508
00:28:09,980 --> 00:28:13,024
V. I. Lenin, Vladimir
Ilyich Ulyanov!
509
00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:14,275
What the fuck is
he talking about?
510
00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:16,194
Fucking exactly what
happened to those. ..
511
00:28:16,278 --> 00:28:17,820
That makes me
fucking sick!
512
00:28:17,946 --> 00:28:20,865
Well, what do you care, Walter?
Those rich fucks.
513
00:28:20,949 --> 00:28:22,909
This whole fucking thing.
514
00:28:22,993 --> 00:28:25,745
I did not watch my buddies
die face down in the muck
515
00:28:25,829 --> 00:28:27,580
so that this
fucking strumpet,
516
00:28:27,664 --> 00:28:28,831
this fucking whore,
could waltz around. ..
517
00:28:28,916 --> 00:28:31,334
I don't see any connection
with Vietnam, man.
518
00:28:31,418 --> 00:28:33,044
Well, there isn't a
literal connection, Dude.
519
00:28:33,128 --> 00:28:35,046
No, Walter, face it,
there isn't any connection.
520
00:28:35,130 --> 00:28:36,589
Your roll.
Have it your way.
521
00:28:36,673 --> 00:28:38,007
Your roll.
But my point is. ..
522
00:28:38,133 --> 00:28:40,885
My point is. ..
Are you ready to be fucked, man?
523
00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:45,348
I see you rolled your way
into the semis.
524
00:28:46,392 --> 00:28:48,726
Dios mío, man.
525
00:28:48,811 --> 00:28:51,646
Liam and me,
we're gonna fuck you up.
526
00:28:52,147 --> 00:28:57,944
Yeah? Well, you know, that's
just like your opinion, man.
527
00:28:59,154 --> 00:29:02,240
Let me tell you
something, pendejo.
528
00:29:02,324 --> 00:29:04,534
You pull any of your
crazy shit with us,
529
00:29:04,618 --> 00:29:07,412
you flash a piece out
on the lanes,
530
00:29:07,496 --> 00:29:10,415
I'll take it away from you
and stick it up your ass
531
00:29:10,499 --> 00:29:13,709
and pull the fucking trigger
till it goes click.
532
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:16,921
Jesus.
533
00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:18,673
You said it, man.
534
00:29:18,757 --> 00:29:21,008
Nobody fucks with the Jesus.
535
00:29:27,307 --> 00:29:28,683
Eight-year-olds, Dude.
536
00:29:51,874 --> 00:29:55,042
La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
537
00:29:55,419 --> 00:30:01,841
La-la-la, la, la, la, la
538
00:30:02,176 --> 00:30:03,926
La-la, la-la
539
00:30:06,096 --> 00:30:07,722
La-la-la
540
00:30:08,974 --> 00:30:11,017
La-la-la, la-la-la
541
00:30:11,101 --> 00:30:12,477
La-la, la-la
542
00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:17,648
The man in me will do
543
00:30:18,734 --> 00:30:21,235
Nearly any task
544
00:30:22,070 --> 00:30:25,156
And as for compensation
545
00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:27,325
There's little he would ask
546
00:30:28,911 --> 00:30:31,496
Take a woman like you
547
00:30:32,289 --> 00:30:33,706
To get through
548
00:30:34,166 --> 00:30:36,250
To the man in me
549
00:30:39,296 --> 00:30:42,423
Storm clouds are raging
550
00:30:42,925 --> 00:30:45,468
All around my door
551
00:30:46,553 --> 00:30:48,429
I think to myself
552
00:30:48,514 --> 00:30:51,974
I might not take it anymore
553
00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:55,686
Take a woman like your kind
554
00:30:56,104 --> 00:31:00,149
To find the man in me
555
00:31:02,903 --> 00:31:04,612
But, oh
556
00:31:05,864 --> 00:31:07,782
What a wonderful feeling
557
00:31:10,410 --> 00:31:12,203
Just to know
558
00:31:12,287 --> 00:31:14,747
That you are near
559
00:31:17,709 --> 00:31:21,128
Sets my heart a-reeling
560
00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:25,383
From my toes
561
00:31:25,926 --> 00:31:28,970
Up to my ears
562
00:31:29,846 --> 00:31:33,099
The man in me
will hide sometimes
563
00:31:33,183 --> 00:31:34,684
They called
about 80 minutes ago.
564
00:31:34,768 --> 00:31:37,395
They want you to take the money,
drive north on the 405.
565
00:31:37,479 --> 00:31:38,813
They will call you
on the portable phone
566
00:31:38,897 --> 00:31:40,982
with instructions
in about 40 minutes.
567
00:31:41,066 --> 00:31:42,149
One person only.
568
00:31:42,234 --> 00:31:44,652
They were very clear on that, or
I'd go with you. One person only.
569
00:31:44,778 --> 00:31:47,780
What happened to your jaw?
Oh, nothing, man.
570
00:31:49,324 --> 00:31:50,950
Here's the money.
571
00:31:51,785 --> 00:31:53,411
And the phone.
572
00:31:53,495 --> 00:31:56,330
Please, Dude, follow whatever
instructions they give.
573
00:31:56,415 --> 00:31:59,208
All right.
Her life is in your hands.
574
00:31:59,293 --> 00:32:00,918
Man, don't say that.
575
00:32:01,003 --> 00:32:03,588
Mr. Lebowski asked me to repeat
that, her life is in your hands.
576
00:32:03,672 --> 00:32:05,006
Oh, shit, man.
577
00:32:05,090 --> 00:32:07,425
Her life is in
your hands, Dude.
578
00:32:07,509 --> 00:32:10,177
Report back to us
as soon as it's done.
579
00:32:19,688 --> 00:32:23,941
Where the fuck are you going, man?
Take the ringer, I'll drive.
580
00:32:24,026 --> 00:32:26,235
The what?
The ringer.
581
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:27,945
The ringer, Dude.
582
00:32:35,704 --> 00:32:37,663
What the. ..
Have they called yet?
583
00:32:37,748 --> 00:32:39,540
What the hell is this?
584
00:32:39,625 --> 00:32:42,501
My dirty undies, Dude.
The laundry. The whites.
585
00:32:42,586 --> 00:32:46,714
Walter, I'm sure there's a reason
you brought your dirty undies, man.
586
00:32:46,798 --> 00:32:48,090
That's right, Dude.
The weight.
587
00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:49,467
The ringer cannot look empty.
588
00:32:49,551 --> 00:32:51,636
Walter, what the fuck
are you thinking, man?
589
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,638
You're right, Dude.
I got to thinking.
590
00:32:53,722 --> 00:32:56,557
I got to thinking, why should we settle
for a measly fucking 20 grand. ..
591
00:32:56,642 --> 00:32:59,852
We? What the fuck, "we"?
You said you just wanted to come along.
592
00:32:59,936 --> 00:33:02,313
My point, Dude, is why should
we settle for 20 grand
593
00:33:02,397 --> 00:33:05,066
when we can keep the entire million?
Am I wrong?
594
00:33:05,150 --> 00:33:08,235
Yes, you're wrong. This
isn't a fucking game, man.
595
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:10,655
Oh, but it is a game.
You said so yourself.
596
00:33:10,739 --> 00:33:12,948
She kidnapped herself.
I said I thought. ..
597
00:33:19,206 --> 00:33:21,248
Dude, here.
Who is this?
598
00:33:22,668 --> 00:33:25,628
Dude. The bagman, man.
Where do you want us to go?
599
00:33:25,712 --> 00:33:26,754
Us?
600
00:33:28,382 --> 00:33:29,465
Shit!
601
00:33:31,385 --> 00:33:34,011
Yeah, you know,
me and the driver.
602
00:33:34,096 --> 00:33:37,848
I'm not handling the money, driving the car
and talking on the phone all by my. ..
603
00:33:37,933 --> 00:33:39,183
Shut the fuck up!
604
00:33:39,267 --> 00:33:42,269
Dude, are you fucking this up?
Who is that?
605
00:33:43,605 --> 00:33:46,190
That is the driver.
I told you. ..
606
00:33:47,943 --> 00:33:49,860
Oh, shit!
What the fuck's going on?
607
00:33:49,945 --> 00:33:51,320
Walter. ..
What the fuck is going on?
608
00:33:51,405 --> 00:33:55,700
He hung up, man. You fucked it up.
You fucked it up!
609
00:33:55,826 --> 00:33:58,369
Her life was in our hands, man.
Easy, Dude.
610
00:33:58,453 --> 00:34:02,331
We're screwed now. We don't get shit.
They're gonna kill her.
611
00:34:02,416 --> 00:34:05,126
We're fucked, Walter.
Nothing is fucked, Dude.
612
00:34:05,210 --> 00:34:07,712
Come on.
You're being very un-Dude.
613
00:34:07,796 --> 00:34:10,214
They'll call back.
Look, she kidnapped. ..
614
00:34:11,425 --> 00:34:13,384
You see? Nothing's
fucked here, Dude.
615
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:17,346
Nothing is fucked.
They're a bunch of fucking amateurs.
616
00:34:17,431 --> 00:34:19,932
Walter, will you just
shut the fuck up?
617
00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:22,393
Don't say peep while
I'm doing business here, man.
618
00:34:22,477 --> 00:34:24,437
Okay, Dude.
Have it your way.
619
00:34:26,523 --> 00:34:28,983
But they're amateurs.
Fuck.
620
00:34:30,569 --> 00:34:31,736
Dude.
621
00:34:31,820 --> 00:34:35,072
Okay, we proceed but only
if there is no funny stuff.
622
00:34:35,157 --> 00:34:36,699
Yeah, yeah.
623
00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:38,868
So no funny stuff. Okay?
624
00:34:38,952 --> 00:34:41,537
Just tell me where the fuck
you want us to go.
625
00:34:45,167 --> 00:34:47,376
That was the sign, man.
626
00:34:47,461 --> 00:34:51,172
So, all we gotta do
is get her back.
627
00:34:51,256 --> 00:34:53,632
No one's in a position
to complain.
628
00:34:53,717 --> 00:34:56,135
We keep the baksheesh.
Yeah, terrific, Walter.
629
00:34:56,219 --> 00:34:58,888
But you haven't told me how we're
gonna get her back. Where is she?
630
00:34:58,972 --> 00:35:00,806
That's the simple part, Dude.
631
00:35:00,891 --> 00:35:05,186
We make the hand-off, I grab one of
them and beat it out of him. Huh?
632
00:35:06,313 --> 00:35:08,939
That's a great plan, Walter.
633
00:35:09,024 --> 00:35:11,150
That's fucking ingenious,
if I understand it correctly.
634
00:35:11,234 --> 00:35:13,194
It's a Swiss fucking watch.
635
00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:16,405
That's right, Dude.
The beauty of this is its simplicity.
636
00:35:16,490 --> 00:35:19,742
Once a plan gets too complex,
everything can go wrong.
637
00:35:19,826 --> 00:35:21,577
If there's one thing
I learned in Nam. ..
638
00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:26,624
Dude.
639
00:35:26,708 --> 00:35:28,542
You are coming
to wooden bridge.
640
00:35:28,627 --> 00:35:29,794
When you cross the bridge,
641
00:35:29,878 --> 00:35:33,172
you throw the bag from the
left window of the moving car.
642
00:35:33,256 --> 00:35:34,298
You're being watched.
643
00:35:35,634 --> 00:35:37,968
Fuck. What'd he say?
Where's the hand-off?
644
00:35:38,053 --> 00:35:39,720
There is no fucking
hand-off, man.
645
00:35:39,805 --> 00:35:42,473
At the wooden bridge we throw
the money out of the car.
646
00:35:42,557 --> 00:35:45,392
We throw the money
out of the moving car.
647
00:35:45,936 --> 00:35:48,604
We can't do that, Dude.
That fucks up our plan.
648
00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:50,606
Well, call them up and
explain it to them, Walter.
649
00:35:50,690 --> 00:35:51,941
Your plan is so
fucking simple,
650
00:35:52,025 --> 00:35:53,818
I'm sure they'll
fucking understand it.
651
00:35:53,902 --> 00:35:55,027
That's the beauty of it.
652
00:35:55,153 --> 00:35:57,530
Wooden bridge, huh?
Throw them the money, Walter.
653
00:35:57,614 --> 00:35:59,156
We're not fucking around, man.
654
00:35:59,241 --> 00:36:01,492
Okay, Dude, the bridge is coming up.
Give me the ringer, chop-chop.
655
00:36:01,576 --> 00:36:03,118
Fuck that.
Walter, I love you,
656
00:36:03,203 --> 00:36:06,288
but sooner or later you're gonna have to
face the fact you're a goddamn moron.
657
00:36:06,373 --> 00:36:08,707
Okay, Dude. No time to argue.
Hey, man!
658
00:36:08,792 --> 00:36:11,168
Here's the bridge.
Hey, Walter! Hey, Walter!
659
00:36:11,253 --> 00:36:13,963
Hey, Walter!
Here goes the ringer!
660
00:36:15,257 --> 00:36:17,466
What the fuck?
Okay, Dude, you're wheel.
661
00:36:17,551 --> 00:36:19,718
Hey, man, what the fuck?
At 1 5 mph, I roll out.
662
00:36:19,803 --> 00:36:21,720
I double back, grab one of
them and beat it out of him.
663
00:36:21,805 --> 00:36:23,013
The Uzi.
Uzi.
664
00:36:23,098 --> 00:36:25,182
You didn't think I was rolling
out of here naked, did you?
665
00:36:25,267 --> 00:36:27,893
Walter, please! Fifteen, Dude!
This is it! Let's take that hill!
666
00:36:27,978 --> 00:36:29,270
Walter!
667
00:36:52,085 --> 00:36:54,085
We have it!
668
00:37:13,982 --> 00:37:15,983
Fuck it, Dude.
669
00:37:16,067 --> 00:37:17,651
Let's go bowling.
670
00:37:56,149 --> 00:37:59,443
Aitz chaim he, Dude,
as the ex used to say.
671
00:37:59,527 --> 00:38:01,320
What the fuck is that
supposed to mean?
672
00:38:01,404 --> 00:38:04,490
What the fuck are we
gonna tell Lebowski?
673
00:38:04,574 --> 00:38:06,700
Oh, him.
674
00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:09,787
I don't know.
What exactly is the problem?
675
00:38:09,871 --> 00:38:11,705
The problem is. ..
676
00:38:12,999 --> 00:38:14,750
What do you mean,
what's the. ..
677
00:38:14,834 --> 00:38:16,377
There was no. ..
678
00:38:17,212 --> 00:38:18,796
We didn't. ..
679
00:38:19,881 --> 00:38:22,091
They're gonna kill
that poor woman, man!
680
00:38:22,175 --> 00:38:24,009
What the fuck
are you talking about?
681
00:38:24,094 --> 00:38:26,637
The poor woman, that poor
slut kidnapped herself.
682
00:38:26,721 --> 00:38:28,013
Come on, Dude.
You said so yourself.
683
00:38:28,098 --> 00:38:30,391
Man, I said I thought
she kidnapped herself.
684
00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:31,976
You're the one who's
so fucking certain.
685
00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:34,603
That's right, Dude.
1 00% certain.
686
00:38:34,688 --> 00:38:36,397
They posted the next round
for the tournament.
687
00:38:36,481 --> 00:38:37,731
Donny, shut the fuck. ..
688
00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:39,817
When do we play?
This Saturday. Quintana and. ..
689
00:38:39,901 --> 00:38:41,652
Saturday? Well, they'll
have to reschedule.
690
00:38:41,736 --> 00:38:44,071
Walter, what am I
gonna tell Lebowski?
691
00:38:44,155 --> 00:38:47,491
I told that fuck down at the league office.
Who's in charge of scheduling?
692
00:38:47,575 --> 00:38:49,118
Walter!
Burkhalter.
693
00:38:49,202 --> 00:38:52,162
I told that kraut a fucking thousand
times, I don't roll on shabbos!
694
00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:53,539
Walter!
They already posted it.
695
00:38:53,623 --> 00:38:55,207
Well, they can
fucking un-post it!
696
00:38:55,291 --> 00:38:58,585
Who gives a shit?
They're gonna kill that poor woman, man!
697
00:38:58,712 --> 00:39:00,963
What am I gonna tell Lebowski?
Come on, Dude.
698
00:39:01,047 --> 00:39:04,049
Eventually she'll get tired of her little
game and, you know, wander on back.
699
00:39:04,134 --> 00:39:05,676
How come you don't roll
on Saturday, Walter?
700
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:06,885
I'm shomer shabbos.
701
00:39:07,012 --> 00:39:08,929
What's that, Walter?
Yeah, and in the meantime,
702
00:39:09,014 --> 00:39:10,431
what do I tell Lebowski?
703
00:39:10,515 --> 00:39:12,850
Saturday, Donny, is shabbos,
the Jewish day of rest.
704
00:39:12,934 --> 00:39:15,394
That means I don't work,
I don't drive a car,
705
00:39:15,478 --> 00:39:16,979
I don't fucking
ride in a car,
706
00:39:17,063 --> 00:39:18,897
I don't handle money,
I don't turn on the oven
707
00:39:18,982 --> 00:39:21,108
and I sure as shit
don't fucking roll!
708
00:39:22,027 --> 00:39:23,110
Sheesh.
709
00:39:23,194 --> 00:39:24,737
Shomer shabbos!
710
00:39:26,656 --> 00:39:29,324
Walter, how am I gonna. ..
Shomer fucking shabbos!
711
00:39:29,451 --> 00:39:32,703
Oh, fuck! That's it. I'm out of here.
Oh, come on, Dude.
712
00:39:34,748 --> 00:39:36,623
Dude! Dude!
713
00:39:38,877 --> 00:39:40,210
You just tell him. ..
714
00:39:40,295 --> 00:39:42,671
Tell him we made the drop and
everything went, you know. ..
715
00:39:42,756 --> 00:39:43,797
Oh, yeah.
How'd it go?
716
00:39:43,882 --> 00:39:45,758
Went all right.
Dude's car got a little dinged up.
717
00:39:45,842 --> 00:39:48,218
Walter, we didn't make
the fucking hand-off, man!
718
00:39:48,303 --> 00:39:50,387
They didn't get
the fucking money!
719
00:39:50,472 --> 00:39:51,680
And they're gonna. ..
They're gonna. ..
720
00:39:51,765 --> 00:39:53,348
They're gonna kill
that poor woman.
721
00:39:53,433 --> 00:39:56,101
They're gonna kill
that poor woman!
722
00:39:56,186 --> 00:39:57,644
Walter, if you can't
ride in a car,
723
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,104
then how do you get
around on shabbos?
724
00:39:59,189 --> 00:40:01,231
Really, Dude,
you surprise me.
725
00:40:01,316 --> 00:40:02,608
They're not gonna
kill shit.
726
00:40:02,692 --> 00:40:03,817
They're not gonna do shit.
727
00:40:03,902 --> 00:40:05,527
What can they do to her?
Bunch of fucking amateurs.
728
00:40:05,612 --> 00:40:07,446
And meanwhile,
look at the bottom line.
729
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:09,782
Who's sitting on a million
fucking dollars?
730
00:40:09,866 --> 00:40:10,991
Am I wrong?
Walter.
731
00:40:11,076 --> 00:40:14,119
Who's got a fucking million fucking
dollars sitting in the trunk of our car?
732
00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:17,247
Our car, Walter? And what do they got?
My dirty undies.
733
00:40:17,332 --> 00:40:18,999
My fucking whites!
734
00:40:25,090 --> 00:40:26,423
Say, Dude?
735
00:40:27,300 --> 00:40:29,218
Where is your car?
736
00:40:29,344 --> 00:40:32,471
Who's got your undies, Walter?
Where's your car, Dude?
737
00:40:32,555 --> 00:40:34,681
You don't know,
Walter?
738
00:40:35,391 --> 00:40:39,061
It was parked in a handicap zone.
Perhaps they towed it.
739
00:40:39,979 --> 00:40:42,689
You fucking know
it's been stolen.
740
00:40:42,774 --> 00:40:45,692
Well, certainly that's
a possibility, Dude.
741
00:40:47,070 --> 00:40:48,487
Oh, fuck it.
742
00:40:51,032 --> 00:40:54,451
Where you going, Dude?
I'm going home, Donny.
743
00:40:54,536 --> 00:40:57,704
Phone's ringing, Dude.
Thank you, Donny!
744
00:41:13,388 --> 00:41:14,513
Yeah.
745
00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:21,019
Green with some brown,
rust coloration.
746
00:41:22,230 --> 00:41:25,357
And was there anything
of value in the car?
747
00:41:25,441 --> 00:41:26,900
Oh, yeah.
748
00:41:28,278 --> 00:41:32,614
A tape deck, some Creedence
tapes, and there was a. ..
749
00:41:35,201 --> 00:41:36,743
My briefcase.
750
00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:40,956
In the briefcase?
751
00:41:43,084 --> 00:41:44,251
Papers.
752
00:41:45,170 --> 00:41:46,587
Just papers.
753
00:41:47,589 --> 00:41:50,966
You know, my papers,
business papers.
754
00:41:52,635 --> 00:41:55,971
And what do you do, sir?
I'm unemployed.
755
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:02,269
My rug was also stolen.
756
00:42:02,353 --> 00:42:04,646
Your rug was in the car?
757
00:42:04,731 --> 00:42:06,440
No. Here.
758
00:42:07,108 --> 00:42:08,775
Separate incidents.
759
00:42:10,778 --> 00:42:12,529
The Dude is not in.
760
00:42:12,614 --> 00:42:15,449
Do you find them much,
these stolen cars?
761
00:42:16,534 --> 00:42:17,868
Sometimes.
762
00:42:18,703 --> 00:42:21,163
Wouldn't hold out much hope
for the tape deck though.
763
00:42:21,247 --> 00:42:22,956
Or the Creedence.
764
00:42:23,124 --> 00:42:27,085
What about the briefcase?
765
00:42:27,629 --> 00:42:29,046
Mr. Lebowski,
I'd like to see you.
766
00:42:29,130 --> 00:42:31,048
Call when you get home
and I'll send a car for you.
767
00:42:31,132 --> 00:42:34,760
My name is Maude Lebowski.
I'm the one who took your rug.
768
00:42:34,844 --> 00:42:37,930
Well, guess we can close
the file on that one.
769
00:43:29,524 --> 00:43:32,442
I'll be with you in
a moment, Mr. Lebowski.
770
00:43:50,962 --> 00:43:54,381
Does the female form make you
uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski?
771
00:43:54,465 --> 00:43:58,260
Is that what this is a picture of?
In a sense, yes.
772
00:43:58,344 --> 00:44:01,013
My art has been commended
as being strongly vaginal,
773
00:44:01,097 --> 00:44:02,180
which bothers some men.
774
00:44:02,265 --> 00:44:05,225
The word itself makes
some men uncomfortable.
775
00:44:05,727 --> 00:44:07,811
Vagina.
Oh, yeah?
776
00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:10,314
Yes, they don't like hearing it
and find it difficult to say,
777
00:44:10,398 --> 00:44:11,773
whereas without
batting an eye,
778
00:44:11,858 --> 00:44:16,069
a man will refer to his dick,
or his rod or his johnson.
779
00:44:17,322 --> 00:44:18,322
"Johnson"?
780
00:44:18,406 --> 00:44:21,116
All right, Mr. Lebowski,
let's get down to cases.
781
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:23,660
My father told me he agreed
to let you have the rug,
782
00:44:23,745 --> 00:44:27,706
but as it was a gift from me to my
late mother, it was not his to give.
783
00:44:27,790 --> 00:44:29,708
Now, your face.
784
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:32,878
As for this kidnapping.
785
00:44:33,004 --> 00:44:34,004
Huh?
786
00:44:34,088 --> 00:44:37,507
Yes, I know all about it, and I
know that you acted as courier.
787
00:44:37,592 --> 00:44:40,844
Let me tell you something.
The whole thing stinks to high heaven.
788
00:44:40,928 --> 00:44:45,140
Yeah, right, but let me explain
something about the rug.
789
00:44:45,224 --> 00:44:47,434
Do you like sex,
Mr. Lebowski?
790
00:44:48,436 --> 00:44:51,688
Excuse me? Sex, the physical
act of love. Coitus.
791
00:44:51,814 --> 00:44:55,025
Do you like it?
I was talking about my rug.
792
00:44:55,109 --> 00:44:57,652
You're not interested in sex?
793
00:44:57,737 --> 00:45:00,030
You mean coitus?
I like it, too.
794
00:45:00,114 --> 00:45:02,366
It's a male myth about
feminists that we hate sex.
795
00:45:02,450 --> 00:45:04,868
It can be a natural,
zesty enterprise.
796
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:06,370
However, there are
some people,
797
00:45:06,454 --> 00:45:09,373
it is called satyriasis in
men, nymphomania in women,
798
00:45:09,457 --> 00:45:12,626
who engage in it compulsively
and without joy.
799
00:45:12,710 --> 00:45:15,712
Oh, no.
Oh, yes, Mr. Lebowski.
800
00:45:15,797 --> 00:45:19,716
These unfortunate souls cannot love,
in the true sense of the word.
801
00:45:19,801 --> 00:45:23,261
Our mutual acquaintance,
Bunny, is one of these.
802
00:45:23,346 --> 00:45:25,555
Listen, Maude,
803
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:28,850
I'm sorry if your stepmother
is a nympho,
804
00:45:28,935 --> 00:45:32,312
but, you know, I don't see
what this has to do with. ..
805
00:45:32,397 --> 00:45:35,190
You have any Kahlua?
Take a look at this, sir.
806
00:45:38,736 --> 00:45:40,570
Oh, I know that guy.
807
00:45:42,156 --> 00:45:44,366
He's a nihilist.
808
00:45:45,952 --> 00:45:47,661
"Karl Hungus."
809
00:46:01,426 --> 00:46:02,843
Hi.
Hello.
810
00:46:02,927 --> 00:46:05,887
Mein dispatcher says there is
something wrong with dein Kabel.
811
00:46:05,972 --> 00:46:07,097
Yeah. Come on in.
812
00:46:07,181 --> 00:46:09,599
I'm not really sure exactly what's
really wrong with the cable.
813
00:46:09,684 --> 00:46:12,269
That's why they sent me.
I am an expert.
814
00:46:12,353 --> 00:46:13,687
The TV's in here.
815
00:46:13,729 --> 00:46:16,940
You recognize her, of course.
Helga, bring my tools.
816
00:46:19,861 --> 00:46:21,611
That's my friend Sherry.
817
00:46:21,696 --> 00:46:23,363
She just came over
to use the shower.
818
00:46:23,448 --> 00:46:25,782
The story is ludicrous.
819
00:46:25,867 --> 00:46:28,827
My name is Karl.
Ich bin expert.
820
00:46:28,911 --> 00:46:30,954
You must be here
to fix the cable.
821
00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:33,915
Lord, you can imagine
where it goes from here.
822
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,459
He fixes the cable?
823
00:46:35,543 --> 00:46:37,586
Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.
824
00:46:37,670 --> 00:46:40,964
Little matter to me that this woman chose
to pursue a career in pornography,
825
00:46:41,048 --> 00:46:43,675
nor that she has been
banging Jackie Treehorn,
826
00:46:43,759 --> 00:46:45,510
to use the parlance
of our times.
827
00:46:45,595 --> 00:46:49,556
However, I am one of the two
trustees of the Lebowski Foundation,
828
00:46:49,640 --> 00:46:51,308
the other being my father.
829
00:46:51,392 --> 00:46:53,351
The foundation takes
youngsters from Watts and. ..
830
00:46:53,436 --> 00:46:54,811
Shit, yeah. The achievers.
831
00:46:54,896 --> 00:46:58,607
Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, yes,
and proud we are of all of them.
832
00:46:58,691 --> 00:47:02,527
I asked my father about his withdrawal of
$1 million from the foundation account,
833
00:47:02,612 --> 00:47:04,446
and he told me
about this abduction,
834
00:47:04,530 --> 00:47:06,156
but I tell you
it is preposterous.
835
00:47:06,240 --> 00:47:10,160
This compulsive fornicator is taking
my father for the proverbial ride.
836
00:47:10,244 --> 00:47:12,162
Yeah, but my. ..
I'm getting to your rug.
837
00:47:12,246 --> 00:47:13,997
My father and I
don't get along.
838
00:47:14,081 --> 00:47:15,707
He doesn't approve
of my lifestyle and,
839
00:47:15,791 --> 00:47:17,459
needless to say,
I don't approve of his.
840
00:47:17,543 --> 00:47:21,338
However, I hardly wish to make my
father's embezzlement a police matter.
841
00:47:21,422 --> 00:47:24,299
So I'm proposing that you
try to recover the money
842
00:47:24,383 --> 00:47:26,510
from the people
you delivered it to.
843
00:47:26,594 --> 00:47:29,513
Well, I could do that.
844
00:47:29,597 --> 00:47:31,473
If you successfully do so,
845
00:47:31,557 --> 00:47:36,811
I will compensate you to the tune
of 1 0% of the recovered sum.
846
00:47:36,896 --> 00:47:38,897
A hundred. ..
Thousand. Yes.
847
00:47:38,981 --> 00:47:41,733
Bones or clams or
whatever you call them.
848
00:47:41,817 --> 00:47:46,071
Yeah, but what about my. ..
Your rug, yes.
849
00:47:46,155 --> 00:47:48,740
Well, with that money you
can buy any number of rugs
850
00:47:48,824 --> 00:47:51,451
that don't have sentimental
value for me.
851
00:47:51,536 --> 00:47:54,037
And I am sorry about
that crack on the jaw.
852
00:47:54,121 --> 00:47:56,581
Oh, that's fine.
That doesn't even. ..
853
00:47:56,666 --> 00:47:59,209
Here's the name and number of a
doctor who will look at it for you.
854
00:47:59,293 --> 00:48:00,877
You will receive no bill.
855
00:48:00,962 --> 00:48:02,546
He's a good man
and thorough.
856
00:48:02,630 --> 00:48:04,214
That's thoughtful but. ..
857
00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:07,801
Please see him, Jeffrey.
He's a good man and thorough.
858
00:48:09,428 --> 00:48:11,596
Oh, well, all right.
859
00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:14,266
So he says, "My wife's
a pain in the ass.
860
00:48:14,350 --> 00:48:16,768
"She's always busting
my frigging agates.
861
00:48:16,852 --> 00:48:20,063
"My daughter's married
to a loser bastard.
862
00:48:20,147 --> 00:48:23,984
"I got a rash so bad on my
ass I can't even sit down.
863
00:48:24,110 --> 00:48:26,319
"But you know me,
I can't complain."
864
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:30,991
I got a rash, man. Fucking A.
865
00:48:32,034 --> 00:48:34,578
I gotta tell you, Tone, man,
866
00:48:34,662 --> 00:48:37,789
earlier today I was really
feeling shitty, man.
867
00:48:37,873 --> 00:48:39,791
Really down in the dumps.
868
00:48:39,875 --> 00:48:41,251
Lost a little money. ..
869
00:48:41,335 --> 00:48:44,754
Hey, you know what? Forget about it, huh?
Forget about it.
870
00:48:44,839 --> 00:48:46,089
Yeah, fuck it, man.
871
00:48:46,173 --> 00:48:49,009
You can't be worried about that shit.
Life goes on, man.
872
00:48:49,093 --> 00:48:51,803
Well, home, sweet home,
Mr. L.
873
00:48:54,515 --> 00:48:56,808
Hey, yo. Come here.
874
00:48:56,892 --> 00:48:59,394
Who's your friend in
the Volkswagen? Huh?
875
00:49:01,272 --> 00:49:03,481
Yeah.
He followed us here.
876
00:49:03,566 --> 00:49:06,484
When did he start. ..
Whoa! What the fuck?
877
00:49:06,569 --> 00:49:08,695
Get in the limo, you son of a bitch!
No arguments!
878
00:49:08,779 --> 00:49:11,656
Hey! Hey! Careful, man!
There's a beverage here!
879
00:49:13,326 --> 00:49:15,785
Start talking, and talk
fast, you lousy bum.
880
00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:17,704
We've been frantically
trying to reach you, Dude.
881
00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:20,332
Where is my goddamn money,
you bum?
882
00:49:21,876 --> 00:49:24,586
Well, we. . . I don't. ..
883
00:49:24,670 --> 00:49:26,963
They did not receive
the money, you nitwit!
884
00:49:27,048 --> 00:49:28,632
They did not
receive the money!
885
00:49:28,716 --> 00:49:31,009
Her life was
in your hands!
886
00:49:31,093 --> 00:49:32,636
This is our concern, Dude.
887
00:49:32,720 --> 00:49:34,763
No, man.
Nothing is fucked here.
888
00:49:34,847 --> 00:49:36,765
Nothing is fucked?
No, man.
889
00:49:36,849 --> 00:49:40,644
The goddamn plane has
crashed into the mountain!
890
00:49:40,728 --> 00:49:44,981
Man, come on. Who are you gonna
believe, those guys or. ..
891
00:49:45,066 --> 00:49:46,816
We dropped off the damn money.
892
00:49:46,901 --> 00:49:48,193
We?
893
00:49:49,487 --> 00:49:52,489
I, the royal we.
894
00:49:52,573 --> 00:49:53,907
You know. The editorial. ..
895
00:49:53,991 --> 00:49:56,034
I dropped off the money
exactly as per. ..
896
00:49:56,118 --> 00:49:59,871
Look, man, I've got certain information.
All right?
897
00:49:59,955 --> 00:50:02,457
Certain things have
come to light and. ..
898
00:50:02,541 --> 00:50:05,168
You know, has it ever
occurred to you
899
00:50:05,252 --> 00:50:10,674
that instead of, you know,
running around, blaming me. ..
900
00:50:10,758 --> 00:50:12,967
You know, given the nature
of all this new shit,
901
00:50:13,052 --> 00:50:18,890
you know, this could be
a lot more complex. ..
902
00:50:18,974 --> 00:50:23,937
I mean, it's not just. ..
It might not be just such a simple. . . You know?
903
00:50:24,021 --> 00:50:27,524
What in God's holy name
are you blathering about?
904
00:50:27,608 --> 00:50:29,984
Well, I'll tell you what
I'm blathering about.
905
00:50:30,069 --> 00:50:32,028
I've got information, man.
906
00:50:32,113 --> 00:50:33,863
New shit has come to light.
907
00:50:33,948 --> 00:50:35,907
And, shit, man,
908
00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:39,786
she kidnapped herself.
909
00:50:42,790 --> 00:50:45,542
Well, sure, man.
Look at it. You know?
910
00:50:45,626 --> 00:50:49,546
A young trophy wife, in the
parlance of our times, you know.
911
00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:54,801
She owes money all over town,
including to known pornographers.
912
00:50:56,721 --> 00:50:58,972
And that's cool.
That's cool.
913
00:50:59,849 --> 00:51:03,685
I'm saying she
needs money, man.
914
00:51:03,769 --> 00:51:07,439
And, you know, of course they're
gonna say they didn't get it
915
00:51:08,733 --> 00:51:11,568
because she wants more, man.
916
00:51:11,652 --> 00:51:14,070
She's gotta feed the monkey.
I mean. ..
917
00:51:16,407 --> 00:51:19,492
Hasn't that ever
occurred to you, man?
918
00:51:19,577 --> 00:51:20,660
Sir?
919
00:51:22,830 --> 00:51:26,207
No, Mr. Lebowski, it had
not occurred to me.
920
00:51:26,292 --> 00:51:28,501
That had not
occurred to us, Dude.
921
00:51:28,586 --> 00:51:30,044
Well, okay, you know?
922
00:51:30,129 --> 00:51:34,632
You guys aren't privy to all
the new shit, so, you know. ..
923
00:51:34,717 --> 00:51:38,094
But, hey, that's what you. ..
That's what you pay me for.
924
00:51:40,514 --> 00:51:41,639
Speaking of which,
925
00:51:41,724 --> 00:51:46,060
do you think that you could
give me my $20,000 in cash?
926
00:51:46,145 --> 00:51:49,105
My concern is, and I've gotta
check it with my accountant,
927
00:51:49,190 --> 00:51:51,941
that this might bump me up
into a higher tax. ..
928
00:51:52,026 --> 00:51:54,611
Brandt, give him
the envelope.
929
00:51:55,321 --> 00:51:59,282
Oh, well, if you've already got
the check made out, that's cool.
930
00:51:59,366 --> 00:52:01,367
We received this
this morning.
931
00:52:03,913 --> 00:52:07,290
Since you have
failed to achieve,
932
00:52:07,374 --> 00:52:10,877
even in the modest task
which was your charge,
933
00:52:10,961 --> 00:52:14,130
since you have
stolen my money,
934
00:52:14,215 --> 00:52:17,926
since you have unrepentantly
betrayed my trust,
935
00:52:18,010 --> 00:52:21,971
I have no choice
but to tell these bums
936
00:52:22,056 --> 00:52:24,265
to do whatever is necessary
937
00:52:24,350 --> 00:52:28,478
to recover their money
from you, Jeffrey Lebowski.
938
00:52:29,730 --> 00:52:33,817
And with Brandt as my witness,
I will tell you this,
939
00:52:33,901 --> 00:52:37,153
any further harm
visited upon Bunny
940
00:52:37,238 --> 00:52:40,865
will be visited tenfold
upon your head.
941
00:52:43,244 --> 00:52:44,702
By God, sir,
942
00:52:45,246 --> 00:52:48,248
I will not abide another toe.
943
00:52:48,874 --> 00:52:54,254
I hear the cottonwoods
whispering above
944
00:52:54,338 --> 00:52:56,464
That wasn't her toe, Dude.
945
00:52:58,217 --> 00:53:01,219
Whose toe was it, Walter?
How the fuck should I know?
946
00:53:01,345 --> 00:53:04,848
I do know that nothing about it indicates.
.. The nail polish, Walter.
947
00:53:04,932 --> 00:53:06,224
Fine, Dude.
948
00:53:06,308 --> 00:53:10,186
As if it's impossible to get some nail
polish, apply it to someone else's toe. ..
949
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:11,563
Someone else. ..
Pinking shears.
950
00:53:11,647 --> 00:53:13,022
Where the fuck are
they gonna get. ..
951
00:53:13,107 --> 00:53:15,859
You want a toe?
I can get you a toe.
952
00:53:15,943 --> 00:53:17,819
Believe me,
there are ways, Dude.
953
00:53:17,945 --> 00:53:20,196
You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
Yeah, but, Walter. ..
954
00:53:20,281 --> 00:53:23,700
Hell, I could get you a toe by 3:00
this afternoon with nail polish.
955
00:53:23,784 --> 00:53:25,702
These fucking amateurs.
Walter. ..
956
00:53:25,786 --> 00:53:28,621
They send us a toe, we're supposed
to shit ourselves with fear.
957
00:53:28,706 --> 00:53:30,248
Jesus Christ!
Walter. ..
958
00:53:30,374 --> 00:53:32,458
The point is. ..
They're gonna kill her, Walter,
959
00:53:32,543 --> 00:53:34,210
and then they're
gonna kill me.
960
00:53:34,295 --> 00:53:36,754
Dude, that's. ..
961
00:53:38,048 --> 00:53:40,216
That's just the
stress talking, man.
962
00:53:40,301 --> 00:53:45,346
Now, so far we have what appears to me
to be a series of victimless crimes.
963
00:53:45,431 --> 00:53:47,974
What about the toe?
Forget about the fucking toe!
964
00:53:48,058 --> 00:53:51,185
Excuse me, sir.
Could you please keep your voices down?
965
00:53:51,270 --> 00:53:53,062
This is a family restaurant.
966
00:53:53,147 --> 00:53:55,565
Oh, please! Dear,
for your information,
967
00:53:55,649 --> 00:53:58,443
the Supreme Court has roundly
rejected prior restraint.
968
00:53:58,527 --> 00:54:00,904
Come on. Walter, this is not a
First Amendment thing, man.
969
00:54:00,988 --> 00:54:04,157
Sir, if you don't calm down, I'm
gonna have to ask you to leave.
970
00:54:04,241 --> 00:54:07,327
Lady, I got buddies who
died face down in the muck
971
00:54:07,411 --> 00:54:10,079
so that you and I can enjoy
this family restaurant!
972
00:54:10,205 --> 00:54:13,541
All right, I'm out of here.
Hey, Dude, don't go away, man.
973
00:54:13,626 --> 00:54:17,587
Come on. This affects all of us, man!
It's our basic freedoms!
974
00:54:22,343 --> 00:54:23,801
I'm staying.
975
00:54:26,013 --> 00:54:28,014
I'm finishing my coffee.
976
00:54:32,853 --> 00:54:34,646
Enjoying my coffee.
977
00:54:50,871 --> 00:54:53,039
The Dude is not in.
978
00:54:53,123 --> 00:54:55,959
Leave a message after the beep.
it takes a minute.
979
00:54:57,169 --> 00:55:00,880
Mr. Lebowski, this is Duty
Officer Rolvaag of the LAPD.
980
00:55:00,965 --> 00:55:02,465
We've recovered
your automobile.
981
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:05,843
It can be claimed at the North Hollywood
Auto Circus there on Victory.
982
00:55:05,928 --> 00:55:07,053
Their hours there are...
983
00:55:07,137 --> 00:55:08,680
Far out, man. Far fucking out!
984
00:55:19,149 --> 00:55:22,527
Hey! This is a private
residence, man.
985
00:55:30,911 --> 00:55:32,745
Oh, nice marmot.
986
00:55:42,506 --> 00:55:46,592
Where is the money, Lebowski?
We wants the money, Lebowski!
987
00:55:52,599 --> 00:55:55,810
You think we are kidding or
making with the funny stuff?
988
00:55:55,894 --> 00:55:58,187
We could do things you haven't
dreamed of, Lebowski.
989
00:55:58,313 --> 00:56:02,233
Ja, we believes in nothing.
We believes in nothing, Lebowski. Nothing!
990
00:56:02,317 --> 00:56:05,653
And tomorrow we come back
and we cut off your johnson.
991
00:56:05,738 --> 00:56:08,990
Excuse me?
I said, we cut off your johnson!
992
00:56:09,074 --> 00:56:11,492
Just think about that,
Lebowski.
993
00:56:11,577 --> 00:56:13,494
Your wiggly penis, Lebowski.
994
00:56:13,579 --> 00:56:15,913
Ja. Maybe we stomp on it
and squish it.
995
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:29,302
It was discovered last night in Van
Nuys lodged against an abutment.
996
00:56:29,386 --> 00:56:31,179
Oh, man. Lodged where?
997
00:56:31,263 --> 00:56:33,556
You're lucky she didn't
get chopped, Mr. Lebowski.
998
00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,059
Oh, man!
Must've been a joyride situation.
999
00:56:36,143 --> 00:56:38,686
They abandoned the vehicle once
they hit the retaining wall.
1000
00:56:38,771 --> 00:56:42,106
Oh, my fucking briefcase, man!
It's not here! Shit!
1001
00:56:42,191 --> 00:56:43,900
Yeah, I saw that
on the report. Sorry.
1002
00:56:43,984 --> 00:56:45,985
You gotta get in
on the other side.
1003
00:56:47,029 --> 00:56:50,198
The side view was found
on the road by the car.
1004
00:56:51,784 --> 00:56:55,703
You're lucky they left the tape
deck though, and the Creedence.
1005
00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:58,706
Oh, Jesus!
What's that smell, man?
1006
00:56:58,791 --> 00:57:01,834
Yeah. It's probably
a vagrant slept in the car.
1007
00:57:01,919 --> 00:57:04,670
Or maybe just used it
as a toilet and moved on.
1008
00:57:04,755 --> 00:57:06,005
Hey, man,
1009
00:57:07,341 --> 00:57:08,966
are you gonna find these guys?
1010
00:57:09,051 --> 00:57:13,596
Or, you know, I mean. ..
You got any promising leads or. ..
1011
00:57:13,889 --> 00:57:15,431
Leads?
1012
00:57:15,516 --> 00:57:17,100
Yeah. Sure.
1013
00:57:17,184 --> 00:57:20,436
I'll just check with the boys
down at the crime lab.
1014
00:57:20,521 --> 00:57:24,357
They got four more detectives
working on the case.
1015
00:57:24,441 --> 00:57:26,067
They got us working in shifts!
1016
00:57:31,532 --> 00:57:32,698
Leads!
1017
00:57:33,534 --> 00:57:35,952
My only hope is that
the big Lebowski kills me
1018
00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:37,745
before the Germans
can cut my dick off.
1019
00:57:37,830 --> 00:57:38,955
Leads!
1020
00:57:39,039 --> 00:57:40,706
Now, that is just
ridiculous, Dude.
1021
00:57:40,791 --> 00:57:42,500
No one's going to
cut your dick off.
1022
00:57:42,626 --> 00:57:45,128
Thank you, Walter.
Not if I have anything to say about it.
1023
00:57:45,212 --> 00:57:46,254
Thank you, Walter.
1024
00:57:46,380 --> 00:57:48,381
That makes me feel very secure.
Dude?
1025
00:57:48,507 --> 00:57:51,425
That makes me feel very
warm inside, man. Dude?
1026
00:57:51,510 --> 00:57:54,262
This whole fucking thing.
1027
00:57:54,346 --> 00:57:57,557
I could be sitting here with
just pee stains on my rug.
1028
00:57:57,683 --> 00:58:00,935
But no, man, I got a, you know.
.. Yeah. Fucking Germans.
1029
00:58:01,019 --> 00:58:02,186
Nothing changes.
1030
00:58:03,230 --> 00:58:06,816
Fucking Nazis.
They were Nazis, Dude?
1031
00:58:06,900 --> 00:58:09,485
Oh, come on, Donny.
They were threatening castration!
1032
00:58:09,570 --> 00:58:11,404
Uh-huh.
Are we gonna split hairs here?
1033
00:58:11,488 --> 00:58:12,822
No.
Am I wrong?
1034
00:58:12,906 --> 00:58:16,200
Well, he didn't. ..
Man, they were nihilists, man.
1035
00:58:16,285 --> 00:58:18,828
They kept saying they
believed in nothing.
1036
00:58:18,912 --> 00:58:20,246
Nihilists.
1037
00:58:21,957 --> 00:58:23,249
Fuck me.
1038
00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:28,129
I mean, say what you want about the
tenets of national socialism, Dude.
1039
00:58:28,213 --> 00:58:30,506
At least it's an ethos.
Yeah.
1040
00:58:30,591 --> 00:58:33,301
And, also, let's not forget.
.. Let's not forget, Dude,
1041
00:58:33,385 --> 00:58:36,345
that keeping wildlife,
an amphibious rodent,
1042
00:58:36,430 --> 00:58:39,974
for, you know,
domestic. ..
1043
00:58:40,058 --> 00:58:41,809
Within the city. ..
1044
00:58:42,603 --> 00:58:45,688
That ain't legal, either.
What are you, a fucking park ranger now?
1045
00:58:45,772 --> 00:58:47,356
No! I'm just
trying to. ..
1046
00:58:47,441 --> 00:58:50,151
Who gives a shit
about the fucking marmot?
1047
00:58:50,277 --> 00:58:53,487
We are sympathizing here, Dude.
Fuck sympathy.
1048
00:58:53,572 --> 00:58:57,491
I don't need your fucking sympathy, man.
I need my fucking johnson.
1049
00:58:58,452 --> 00:59:01,662
What do you need that for, Dude?
You have got to buck up, man!
1050
00:59:01,747 --> 00:59:04,540
You cannot drag this negative
energy into the tournament.
1051
00:59:04,625 --> 00:59:07,293
Fuck the tournament.
Fuck you, Walter.
1052
00:59:10,005 --> 00:59:12,006
Fuck the tournament?
1053
00:59:12,090 --> 00:59:15,092
Okay, Dude. I can see you don't
want to be cheered up here.
1054
00:59:15,177 --> 00:59:17,637
Come on, Donny.
Let's go get us a lane.
1055
00:59:22,643 --> 00:59:25,311
Another Caucasian, Gary.
Right, Dude.
1056
00:59:27,814 --> 00:59:31,150
Friends like these, huh, Gary?
That's right, Dude.
1057
00:59:38,742 --> 00:59:43,829
See them tumbling down
1058
00:59:44,790 --> 00:59:50,002
Pledging their love
to the ground
1059
00:59:50,671 --> 00:59:54,924
Lonely, but free,
I'll be found
1060
00:59:55,050 --> 00:59:59,387
You got a good sarsaparilla?
Sioux City Sarsaparilla?
1061
00:59:59,471 --> 01:00:01,430
Yeah. That's a good one.
1062
01:00:04,518 --> 01:00:06,811
How're you doing there,
Dude?
1063
01:00:06,895 --> 01:00:08,980
Not too good, man.
1064
01:00:09,564 --> 01:00:11,983
One of those days, huh?
Yeah.
1065
01:00:13,193 --> 01:00:17,947
Well, a wiser fellow
than myself once said,
1066
01:00:18,031 --> 01:00:19,824
"Sometimes you eat
the bear and. . ."
1067
01:00:21,368 --> 01:00:23,452
Much obliged.
1068
01:00:23,537 --> 01:00:27,373
"Sometimes the bear,
well, he eats you."
1069
01:00:29,084 --> 01:00:31,794
That some kind of
Eastern thing?
1070
01:00:31,878 --> 01:00:33,337
Far from it.
1071
01:00:40,053 --> 01:00:42,054
I like your style, Dude.
1072
01:00:43,307 --> 01:00:47,310
Oh, well, I dig
your style, too, man.
1073
01:00:47,394 --> 01:00:49,687
Got a whole cowboy thing
going.
1074
01:00:54,067 --> 01:00:55,526
Thank you.
1075
01:00:55,610 --> 01:00:57,528
There's just one thing, Dude.
1076
01:00:57,612 --> 01:00:59,363
What's that?
1077
01:00:59,448 --> 01:01:02,074
Do you have to use
so many cuss words?
1078
01:01:05,495 --> 01:01:07,788
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1079
01:01:09,082 --> 01:01:11,542
Okay, Dude. Have it your way.
1080
01:01:13,837 --> 01:01:16,172
Take her easy, Dude.
1081
01:01:16,256 --> 01:01:17,923
Yeah. Thanks, man.
1082
01:01:23,930 --> 01:01:25,639
Call for you, Dude.
1083
01:01:29,311 --> 01:01:33,064
Hello? Jeffrey, you have
not gone to the doctor.
1084
01:01:33,148 --> 01:01:36,233
Oh, yeah, no.
No, I haven't yet.
1085
01:01:36,318 --> 01:01:38,819
I'd like to see you
immediately.
1086
01:01:39,738 --> 01:01:40,780
Oh?
1087
01:01:53,460 --> 01:01:56,754
So, you're Lebowski.
Yeah.
1088
01:01:59,633 --> 01:02:01,759
Maude has told me
all about you.
1089
01:02:01,843 --> 01:02:04,303
She'll be back in a minute.
Sit down.
1090
01:02:04,721 --> 01:02:07,723
Do you want a drink?
Yeah, sure. White Russian.
1091
01:02:08,683 --> 01:02:10,476
The bar's over there.
1092
01:02:15,315 --> 01:02:19,402
So, what do you do, Lebowski?
Who the fuck are you, man?
1093
01:02:20,904 --> 01:02:24,740
Just a friend of Maudie's. Yeah?
The friend with the cleft asshole?
1094
01:02:27,911 --> 01:02:30,454
What do you do?
Oh, nothing much.
1095
01:02:31,665 --> 01:02:33,582
Hello, Jeffrey.
Hello.
1096
01:02:33,667 --> 01:02:36,544
Yeah. How are you?
Listen, Maude.
1097
01:02:37,295 --> 01:02:38,838
I got to
1098
01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:43,467
tender my resignation
or whatever
1099
01:02:43,552 --> 01:02:48,556
because looks like your mother
really was kidnapped after all.
1100
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:50,683
She most certainly was not.
1101
01:02:50,767 --> 01:02:55,813
Hey, man, why don't you
fucking listen occasionally?
1102
01:02:55,897 --> 01:02:58,441
You might learn something.
Now, I got. ..
1103
01:02:58,608 --> 01:03:01,360
Please don't call her
my mother.
1104
01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:04,280
She's most definitely the
perpetrator and not the victim.
1105
01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:07,199
I'm telling you, I've got
pretty definitive evidence.
1106
01:03:07,284 --> 01:03:10,119
From who?
From the main guy, Uli.
1107
01:03:10,203 --> 01:03:13,539
Uli Kunkel? Her costar
in the beaver picture?
1108
01:03:15,208 --> 01:03:18,294
You mean vagina?
I mean, you know the guy?
1109
01:03:18,378 --> 01:03:21,213
I might have introduced them,
for all I know.
1110
01:03:21,298 --> 01:03:23,466
Do you remember Uli?
1111
01:03:23,550 --> 01:03:26,302
He's a musician.
Used to have a group, Autobahn.
1112
01:03:26,386 --> 01:03:30,931
Look in my LP's.
They released one album in the late '70s.
1113
01:03:31,016 --> 01:03:33,934
Their music is
sort of a techno pop.
1114
01:03:34,060 --> 01:03:37,480
So he's pretending to be the abductor?
Well, yeah.
1115
01:03:37,564 --> 01:03:40,941
Look, Jeffrey, you don't really kidnap
someone you're acquainted with.
1116
01:03:41,026 --> 01:03:45,529
The whole idea is that the hostage can't
identify you after you've let them go.
1117
01:03:45,614 --> 01:03:47,323
Well, I know that.
1118
01:03:51,495 --> 01:03:54,163
What the fuck is with this guy?
Who is he?
1119
01:03:54,247 --> 01:03:57,750
Knox Harrington,
the video artist.
1120
01:03:57,834 --> 01:03:59,752
So, Uli has the money.
1121
01:04:00,962 --> 01:04:04,507
Well, no, not exactly.
1122
01:04:05,383 --> 01:04:07,218
This is a very complicated
case, Maude.
1123
01:04:09,387 --> 01:04:10,513
A lot of what-have-yous
1124
01:04:10,597 --> 01:04:13,182
and a lot of strands
to keep in my head, man.
1125
01:04:13,266 --> 01:04:15,726
You know, a lot of strands
in the old Duder's head.
1126
01:04:15,810 --> 01:04:17,019
Hello?
1127
01:04:17,103 --> 01:04:18,979
If Uli doesn't have it,
then who does?
1128
01:04:19,064 --> 01:04:20,981
It's Sandra
about the Biennale.
1129
01:04:21,066 --> 01:04:24,568
Look. I have to take this.
Do you still have that doctor's number?
1130
01:04:24,653 --> 01:04:28,197
No, really, it's not even bruised anymore.
Oh, please, Jeffrey.
1131
01:04:28,281 --> 01:04:31,367
I don't want to be responsible
for any delayed aftereffects.
1132
01:04:33,912 --> 01:04:35,538
Aftereffects?
1133
01:05:04,985 --> 01:05:08,279
Could you slide your shorts
down, Mr. Lebowski, please?
1134
01:05:08,363 --> 01:05:09,446
Mmm?
1135
01:05:09,781 --> 01:05:11,740
No, no, man.
She hit me right here.
1136
01:05:11,825 --> 01:05:15,494
I understand. Could you slide
your shorts down, please?
1137
01:05:26,631 --> 01:05:28,924
Just got home from Illinois
1138
01:05:29,009 --> 01:05:31,176
Locked the front door, oh, boy
1139
01:05:31,261 --> 01:05:35,472
Got to sit down,
take a rest on the porch
1140
01:05:35,849 --> 01:05:38,017
Imagination sets in
1141
01:05:38,101 --> 01:05:40,311
Pretty soon I'm singin'
1142
01:05:40,395 --> 01:05:42,229
Doo, doo, doo
1143
01:05:42,314 --> 01:05:44,398
Looking out my back door
1144
01:05:44,482 --> 01:05:47,192
Keeping mighty cool.
There's a giant doing cartwheels
1145
01:05:47,277 --> 01:05:49,528
A statue wearing high heels
1146
01:05:49,613 --> 01:05:51,864
Look at all the
happy creatures
1147
01:05:51,948 --> 01:05:54,199
Dancing on the lawn
1148
01:05:54,284 --> 01:05:58,621
A dinosaur Victrola
listening to Buck Owens
1149
01:05:58,747 --> 01:06:00,748
Doo, doo, doo
1150
01:06:00,832 --> 01:06:02,916
Looking out my back door
1151
01:06:03,376 --> 01:06:07,713
Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the band
1152
01:06:09,215 --> 01:06:10,382
Doo, doo, doo
1153
01:06:10,467 --> 01:06:14,428
Wondrous apparition
provided by magician
1154
01:06:14,888 --> 01:06:16,722
Doo, doo, doo
1155
01:06:16,806 --> 01:06:19,475
Looking out my back door
1156
01:06:37,744 --> 01:06:41,997
Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the band
1157
01:06:42,082 --> 01:06:45,501
Won't you take a ride
on the flying spoon?
1158
01:06:45,585 --> 01:06:47,002
Doo, doo, doo
1159
01:06:47,087 --> 01:06:48,837
Bother me tomorrow
1160
01:06:48,922 --> 01:06:51,382
Today I'll buy no sorrows
1161
01:06:51,466 --> 01:06:52,883
Doo, doo, doo
1162
01:06:52,967 --> 01:06:55,761
Looking out my back door
1163
01:07:48,148 --> 01:07:51,608
He lives in North Hollywood on
Radford, near the In-N-Out Burger.
1164
01:07:51,693 --> 01:07:53,861
No, the In-N-Out
Burger's on Camrose.
1165
01:07:53,945 --> 01:07:56,363
Near the In-N-Out Burger.
Those are good burgers, Walter.
1166
01:07:56,448 --> 01:07:59,324
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
The kid is in the ninth grade, Dude.
1167
01:07:59,409 --> 01:08:02,035
And his father is. ..
Are you ready for this?
1168
01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:05,456
His father is
Arthur Digby Sellers.
1169
01:08:05,540 --> 01:08:07,124
Who the fuck is that?
1170
01:08:07,208 --> 01:08:10,252
Who the fuck is Arthur Digby Sellers?
Who the. ..
1171
01:08:10,336 --> 01:08:12,713
Have you ever heard of a little
show called Branded, Dude?
1172
01:08:12,797 --> 01:08:13,839
Yes, yes, I. ..
1173
01:08:13,923 --> 01:08:15,924
"All but one man died
there at Bitter Creek."
1174
01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:18,260
I know the fucking show,
Walter. So what?
1175
01:08:18,344 --> 01:08:22,389
Fucking Arthur Digby Sellers
wrote 1 56 episodes, Dude.
1176
01:08:22,474 --> 01:08:24,183
The bulk of the series.
1177
01:08:24,267 --> 01:08:25,309
Oh.
1178
01:08:25,351 --> 01:08:27,936
Not exactly a lightweight. No.
1179
01:08:28,021 --> 01:08:30,355
And yet his son
is a fucking dunce.
1180
01:08:31,858 --> 01:08:34,568
Anyway, we'll go there
after the what-have-you.
1181
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,320
We'll brace the kid.
Should be a pushover.
1182
01:08:36,404 --> 01:08:37,613
We'll be near
the In-N-Out Burger.
1183
01:08:37,697 --> 01:08:38,822
Shut the fuck up, Donny!
1184
01:08:41,117 --> 01:08:44,328
We'll go out there, we'll brace the kid.
He should be a pushover.
1185
01:08:44,412 --> 01:08:46,538
We'll get that fucking
million dollars back,
1186
01:08:46,623 --> 01:08:48,749
if he hasn't
spent it already.
1187
01:08:48,833 --> 01:08:50,876
A million fucking clams.
1188
01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:54,630
And, yes, we'll be near the.
.. In-N-Out.
1189
01:08:55,048 --> 01:08:58,467
Shh ! Shh! Some burgers, some beers.
A few laughs.
1190
01:09:01,179 --> 01:09:03,472
Our fucking troubles
are over, Dude.
1191
01:09:15,944 --> 01:09:18,946
Oh, fuck me, man.
1192
01:09:19,030 --> 01:09:21,824
That kid's already spent
all the money, man.
1193
01:09:21,908 --> 01:09:24,159
New Vette? Hardly, Dude.
1194
01:09:24,244 --> 01:09:29,581
I'd say he still has $960,000, $970,000
left, depending on the options.
1195
01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:31,291
Wait in the car, Donny.
1196
01:09:35,463 --> 01:09:37,464
Yes?
Pilar?
1197
01:09:38,675 --> 01:09:42,803
My name is Walter Sobchak.
This is my associate, Jeffrey Lebowski.
1198
01:09:44,222 --> 01:09:46,515
We came to talk
about little Larry.
1199
01:09:46,599 --> 01:09:48,684
May we come in?
Yes, yes.
1200
01:09:48,768 --> 01:09:50,102
Thank you.
1201
01:09:54,440 --> 01:09:56,066
That's him, Dude.
1202
01:10:03,616 --> 01:10:06,076
And a good day
to you, sir!
1203
01:10:06,160 --> 01:10:08,161
Sit down, please.
1204
01:10:13,585 --> 01:10:16,378
Larry, sweetie,
the man is here!
1205
01:10:16,462 --> 01:10:19,298
Is he. ..
Does he still write?
1206
01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:22,509
Oh, no, no.
He has health problems.
1207
01:10:22,677 --> 01:10:23,886
Uh-huh.
1208
01:10:25,638 --> 01:10:27,681
Sir, I just want to say
1209
01:10:28,683 --> 01:10:31,143
that we're both,
on a personal level,
1210
01:10:32,645 --> 01:10:34,605
really enormous fans.
1211
01:10:34,689 --> 01:10:37,858
Branded, especially
the early episodes,
1212
01:10:37,942 --> 01:10:40,068
was truly a source
of inspiration.
1213
01:10:40,153 --> 01:10:42,946
Sweetie, sit down.
This man is the police.
1214
01:10:43,031 --> 01:10:46,617
Oh, no, ma'am. We didn't want to give the
impression that we were police, exactly.
1215
01:10:46,701 --> 01:10:49,453
We're hoping it won't be
necessary to call the police.
1216
01:10:49,537 --> 01:10:51,997
But that's up to
little Larry here.
1217
01:10:52,081 --> 01:10:53,707
Isn't it, Larry?
1218
01:11:04,594 --> 01:11:06,720
Is this your homework,
Larry?
1219
01:11:08,181 --> 01:11:10,390
Is this your homework, Larry?
Look, man, it. ..
1220
01:11:10,475 --> 01:11:13,852
Dude. Please?
Is this your homework, Larry?
1221
01:11:13,937 --> 01:11:15,312
Just ask him about
the car, man.
1222
01:11:15,396 --> 01:11:17,731
Is this yours, Larry?
Is this your homework, Larry?
1223
01:11:17,815 --> 01:11:19,024
Is that your car out front?
1224
01:11:19,067 --> 01:11:22,027
Is this your homework, Larry?
We know it's his fucking homework!
1225
01:11:22,111 --> 01:11:24,363
Where's the fucking money,
you little brat?
1226
01:11:24,447 --> 01:11:27,449
Look, Larry, have you
ever heard of Vietnam?
1227
01:11:27,575 --> 01:11:29,868
For Christ's sake, Walter.
You are entering a world of pain, son.
1228
01:11:29,953 --> 01:11:32,621
We know that this is your homework.
We know that you stole the car.
1229
01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:35,248
And the fucking money.
And the fucking money!
1230
01:11:35,333 --> 01:11:37,000
And we know that
this is your homework!
1231
01:11:37,085 --> 01:11:38,293
We're gonna cut
your dick off, Larry.
1232
01:11:38,378 --> 01:11:40,337
You're killing
your father, Larry.
1233
01:11:43,508 --> 01:11:45,592
All right.
This is pointless.
1234
01:11:46,886 --> 01:11:49,554
Okay, time for Plan B.
1235
01:11:51,808 --> 01:11:54,768
You might want to watch out
that front window, Larry.
1236
01:11:56,062 --> 01:11:59,439
Son, this is what happens when
you fuck a stranger in the ass!
1237
01:12:01,109 --> 01:12:03,068
A little language
problem here.
1238
01:12:03,152 --> 01:12:05,529
Little prick's
stonewalling me.
1239
01:12:06,406 --> 01:12:07,948
Walter.
1240
01:12:08,658 --> 01:12:10,659
What are you doing, man?
1241
01:12:13,287 --> 01:12:15,080
What are you doing?
1242
01:12:16,416 --> 01:12:18,083
Here you go, Larry.
1243
01:12:18,167 --> 01:12:20,168
You see what happens?
1244
01:12:20,253 --> 01:12:22,295
You see what happens, Larry?
1245
01:12:23,047 --> 01:12:24,881
You see what happens?
Oh, great.
1246
01:12:24,966 --> 01:12:28,552
This is what happens when you fuck
a stranger in the ass, Larry.
1247
01:12:31,597 --> 01:12:33,223
This is what happens, Larry.
1248
01:12:33,307 --> 01:12:35,142
You see what happens, Larry?
1249
01:12:35,226 --> 01:12:37,644
You see what happens when you
fuck a stranger in the ass?
1250
01:12:37,770 --> 01:12:40,063
This is what happens!
1251
01:12:42,316 --> 01:12:44,693
You see what happens, Larry?
1252
01:12:44,777 --> 01:12:48,488
Do you see what happens, Larry, when
you fuck a stranger in the ass?
1253
01:12:49,741 --> 01:12:53,035
This is what happens, Larry!
1254
01:12:53,119 --> 01:12:55,871
My car! My baby!
This is what happens, Larry!
1255
01:12:55,955 --> 01:12:57,914
This is what happens
when you fuck a stranger. ..
1256
01:12:57,999 --> 01:13:00,667
What the fuck are you
doing, man? Stop it!
1257
01:13:00,793 --> 01:13:03,253
Hey, man. I just bought
that fucking car last week!
1258
01:13:03,379 --> 01:13:06,381
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm sorry!
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
1259
01:13:06,507 --> 01:13:09,634
I just bought the fucking car last week!
Come on, man.
1260
01:13:09,719 --> 01:13:11,553
I'll kill your
fucking car, man!
1261
01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:13,680
No, no. Hey, hey,
that's not his! Hey!
1262
01:13:13,765 --> 01:13:16,224
God damn it!
Whoa! Oh, no!
1263
01:13:16,309 --> 01:13:18,101
Fuck you!
Man. No.
1264
01:13:18,186 --> 01:13:20,687
You like that? Fuck you!
1265
01:13:20,772 --> 01:13:24,232
- I'll kill your fucking car!
- No. No, no. No.
1266
01:13:24,317 --> 01:13:26,234
I'll kill your fucking car!
1267
01:13:47,256 --> 01:13:49,174
I accept your apology.
1268
01:13:50,343 --> 01:13:53,845
No, I just want to handle it
by myself from now on.
1269
01:13:55,056 --> 01:13:57,099
No. No. No!
1270
01:13:57,183 --> 01:13:59,017
That has nothing
to do with it.
1271
01:14:00,394 --> 01:14:03,772
Yes, the car made it home.
You're calling me at home.
1272
01:14:05,399 --> 01:14:10,153
No, Walter, it did not look
like Larry was about to crack!
1273
01:14:12,365 --> 01:14:14,366
Well, that's your perception.
1274
01:14:16,077 --> 01:14:18,745
You know, Walter,
you're right.
1275
01:14:18,830 --> 01:14:20,789
There is an unspoken
message here.
1276
01:14:20,873 --> 01:14:23,291
It's, "Fuck you!
Leave me the fuck alone!"
1277
01:14:26,212 --> 01:14:28,046
Yeah, I'll be at practice.
1278
01:14:45,648 --> 01:14:47,482
Pin your diapers on,
Lebowski.
1279
01:14:47,567 --> 01:14:49,317
Jackie Treehorn
wants to see you.
1280
01:14:49,402 --> 01:14:52,279
Jackie Treehorn knows which
Lebowski you are, Lebowski.
1281
01:14:52,363 --> 01:14:55,198
Jackie Treehorn wants to
see the deadbeat Lebowski.
1282
01:14:55,283 --> 01:14:57,159
You're not dealing
with morons here.
1283
01:15:45,208 --> 01:15:48,210
Hello, Dude.
Thanks for coming.
1284
01:15:48,294 --> 01:15:49,961
I'm Jackie Treehorn.
1285
01:15:52,882 --> 01:15:55,592
This is quite a pad
you got here, man.
1286
01:15:55,676 --> 01:15:57,677
Completely unspoiled.
1287
01:15:57,762 --> 01:16:00,972
What's your drink, Dude?
A White Russian. Thanks.
1288
01:16:01,849 --> 01:16:03,141
White Russian.
1289
01:16:03,768 --> 01:16:07,729
How's the smut business, Jackie?
I wouldn't know, Dude.
1290
01:16:07,813 --> 01:16:13,235
I deal in publishing, entertainment,
political advocacy.
1291
01:16:13,319 --> 01:16:16,571
Which one's Logjammin'?
Yes, regrettably, it's true.
1292
01:16:16,656 --> 01:16:19,491
Standards have fallen
in adult entertainment.
1293
01:16:19,575 --> 01:16:21,201
It's video, Dude.
1294
01:16:22,036 --> 01:16:23,870
Now that we're competing
with those amateurs,
1295
01:16:23,955 --> 01:16:27,499
we can't afford to invest
in little extras like story,
1296
01:16:28,334 --> 01:16:31,253
production value, feelings.
1297
01:16:33,005 --> 01:16:38,218
You know, people forget that the
brain is the biggest erogenous zone.
1298
01:16:38,844 --> 01:16:40,428
On you maybe.
1299
01:16:40,513 --> 01:16:42,430
Of course, you have to take
the good with the bad.
1300
01:16:42,515 --> 01:16:45,433
New technology permits us
to do very exciting things
1301
01:16:45,518 --> 01:16:48,228
in interactive
erotic software.
1302
01:16:48,312 --> 01:16:52,399
Wave of the future, Dude.
1 00% electronic.
1303
01:16:53,734 --> 01:16:56,361
Well, I still jerk off
manually.
1304
01:16:58,656 --> 01:17:03,034
Of course you do. I can see you're
anxious for me to get to the point.
1305
01:17:03,119 --> 01:17:05,829
Well, here it is, Dude.
1306
01:17:05,913 --> 01:17:07,497
Where's Bunny?
1307
01:17:07,540 --> 01:17:10,125
Well, I thought you might know that, man.
Why would I?
1308
01:17:10,209 --> 01:17:14,462
She only ran off to get away from
that rather sizable debt to me.
1309
01:17:14,547 --> 01:17:16,965
No, she didn't run off.
She's been. ..
1310
01:17:17,049 --> 01:17:19,134
I heard that kidnapping story,
so save it.
1311
01:17:19,218 --> 01:17:21,219
I know you're mixed up
in all this, Dude.
1312
01:17:22,847 --> 01:17:25,974
And I don't care what you're
trying to get from the husband.
1313
01:17:26,058 --> 01:17:27,559
That's your business.
1314
01:17:27,643 --> 01:17:31,479
All I'm saying is I want mine.
1315
01:17:31,564 --> 01:17:32,814
Yeah, right, man.
1316
01:17:32,898 --> 01:17:36,776
I mean, there are a lot of
facets to this,
1317
01:17:36,902 --> 01:17:38,778
a lot of interested parties.
1318
01:17:39,196 --> 01:17:40,530
Excuse me.
1319
01:17:46,245 --> 01:17:47,329
Yeah?
1320
01:17:48,289 --> 01:17:49,456
Oh, yeah?
1321
01:17:49,540 --> 01:17:50,957
Where is that?
1322
01:17:54,587 --> 01:17:56,713
All right. Yeah.
1323
01:17:59,717 --> 01:18:01,051
Excuse me.
1324
01:18:36,545 --> 01:18:40,215
Forgive me.
No problemo, man.
1325
01:18:40,299 --> 01:18:44,636
So, if I can find your money,
1326
01:18:46,430 --> 01:18:48,306
what's in it for the Dude?
1327
01:18:48,391 --> 01:18:51,559
Well, of course, there's that to discuss.
You want a refill?
1328
01:18:51,644 --> 01:18:55,105
Yeah, does the pope shit in the woods?
1 0% finder's fee.
1329
01:18:55,189 --> 01:18:58,650
That all right?
Okay. Done, Jackie.
1330
01:18:59,610 --> 01:19:01,903
I dig the way
you do business, man.
1331
01:19:01,987 --> 01:19:05,615
Your money is being held by
a kid named Larry Sellers.
1332
01:19:05,699 --> 01:19:08,451
He lives in North Hollywood
on Radford,
1333
01:19:09,662 --> 01:19:12,163
by the In-N-Out Burger.
1334
01:19:12,248 --> 01:19:13,289
Fucking brat.
1335
01:19:13,374 --> 01:19:17,585
But I'm sure your goons can get it off him.
I mean, he's 1 5.
1336
01:19:19,839 --> 01:19:21,798
Flunking social studies.
1337
01:19:25,177 --> 01:19:28,054
So, if you could just
1338
01:19:28,139 --> 01:19:32,434
write me a check for
my 1 0% of half a million,
1339
01:19:32,518 --> 01:19:35,603
5 grand,
I'll go out and mingle.
1340
01:19:40,067 --> 01:19:42,527
You mix a hell of
a Caucasian, Jackie.
1341
01:19:44,029 --> 01:19:46,114
Fifteen-year-old kid.
1342
01:19:46,866 --> 01:19:50,869
Is this some sort of a joke?
No. No joke.
1343
01:19:52,663 --> 01:19:55,790
No funny stuff, Jackie.
The kid's got it.
1344
01:19:55,875 --> 01:19:57,041
Hi, fellas.
1345
01:19:59,753 --> 01:20:01,379
Kid just wanted a car.
1346
01:20:04,675 --> 01:20:08,052
All the Dude ever wanted
was his rug back.
1347
01:20:08,554 --> 01:20:09,888
Not greedy.
1348
01:20:11,557 --> 01:20:12,932
It really
1349
01:20:14,560 --> 01:20:16,269
tied the room together.
1350
01:20:19,231 --> 01:20:22,400
Darkness washed
over the Dude.
1351
01:20:22,485 --> 01:20:26,988
Darker than a black steer's tokus
on a moonless prairie night.
1352
01:20:27,948 --> 01:20:30,742
There was no bottom.
1353
01:20:44,840 --> 01:20:47,258
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1354
01:20:47,343 --> 01:20:50,929
What condition
my condition was in
1355
01:20:52,932 --> 01:20:58,269
I woke up this morning
with the sundown shining in
1356
01:21:01,273 --> 01:21:06,611
I found my mind in
a brown paper bag within
1357
01:21:09,490 --> 01:21:13,743
I tripped on a cloud
and fell-a eight miles high
1358
01:21:13,827 --> 01:21:17,872
I tore my mind on a jagged sky
1359
01:21:17,957 --> 01:21:19,707
I just dropped in
1360
01:21:19,792 --> 01:21:23,962
To see what condition
my condition was in
1361
01:21:24,338 --> 01:21:27,006
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1362
01:21:27,091 --> 01:21:30,385
What condition
my condition was in
1363
01:21:36,642 --> 01:21:40,228
I pushed my soul
in a deep, dark hole
1364
01:21:40,312 --> 01:21:42,981
And then l followed it in
1365
01:21:44,900 --> 01:21:48,027
I watched myself crawlin' out
1366
01:21:48,112 --> 01:21:51,990
As l was a-crawlin' in
1367
01:21:52,616 --> 01:21:55,076
I got up so tight
1368
01:21:55,160 --> 01:21:57,287
l couldn't unwind
1369
01:21:57,371 --> 01:22:01,499
I saw so much I broke my mind
1370
01:22:01,584 --> 01:22:03,418
I just dropped in
1371
01:22:03,502 --> 01:22:07,213
To see what condition
my condition was in
1372
01:22:16,181 --> 01:22:18,766
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah
1373
01:22:18,851 --> 01:22:22,103
What condition
my condition was in
1374
01:22:27,985 --> 01:22:31,779
Someone painted "April Fool"
1375
01:22:31,864 --> 01:22:34,490
In big, black letters
on a "Dead End" sign
1376
01:22:36,118 --> 01:22:40,496
I had my foot on the gas
as l left the road
1377
01:22:40,581 --> 01:22:44,167
And blew out my mind
1378
01:22:44,668 --> 01:22:49,088
Eight miles out of Memphis
and I got no spare
1379
01:22:49,173 --> 01:22:53,051
Eight miles straight up
downtown somewhere
1380
01:22:53,385 --> 01:22:55,303
I just dropped in
1381
01:22:55,387 --> 01:22:59,724
To see what condition
my condition was in
1382
01:23:01,143 --> 01:23:03,478
I said I just dropped in
1383
01:23:03,562 --> 01:23:07,732
To see what condition
my condition was in
1384
01:23:08,108 --> 01:23:11,194
Yeah, yeah
1385
01:23:11,278 --> 01:23:13,278
Oh, yeah
1386
01:24:11,714 --> 01:24:15,133
He was innocent
1387
01:24:16,051 --> 01:24:19,679
Not a charge was true
1388
01:24:20,389 --> 01:24:25,977
And they say
he ran away branded
1389
01:24:39,366 --> 01:24:41,200
Is this your only ID?
1390
01:24:41,994 --> 01:24:43,911
I know my rights, man.
1391
01:24:46,039 --> 01:24:47,790
You don't know shit, Lebowski.
1392
01:24:47,875 --> 01:24:50,585
I want a fucking lawyer,
man.
1393
01:24:50,669 --> 01:24:54,839
I want Bill Kunstler, man,
1394
01:24:56,341 --> 01:24:58,050
or Ron Kuby.
1395
01:24:58,135 --> 01:25:01,304
Mr. Treehorn tells us
that he had to eject you
1396
01:25:01,388 --> 01:25:03,389
from his garden party,
1397
01:25:03,849 --> 01:25:05,767
that you were drunk
and abusive.
1398
01:25:05,851 --> 01:25:10,938
Mr. Treehorn treats objects
like women, man.
1399
01:25:11,440 --> 01:25:14,567
Mr. Treehorn draws
a lot of water in this town.
1400
01:25:14,651 --> 01:25:17,028
You don't draw shit, Lebowski.
1401
01:25:17,112 --> 01:25:19,822
Now, we got a nice quiet
little beach community here,
1402
01:25:19,907 --> 01:25:22,450
and I aim to keep it
nice and quiet.
1403
01:25:22,534 --> 01:25:24,869
So let me make
something plain.
1404
01:25:25,412 --> 01:25:29,499
I don't like you sucking around
bothering our citizens, Lebowski.
1405
01:25:30,209 --> 01:25:32,460
I don't like your
jerk-off name.
1406
01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:33,795
I don't like your
jerk-off face.
1407
01:25:33,879 --> 01:25:35,505
I don't like your
jerk-off behavior.
1408
01:25:35,589 --> 01:25:38,549
And I don't like you,
jerk-off.
1409
01:25:42,221 --> 01:25:44,096
Do I make myself clear?
1410
01:25:47,226 --> 01:25:49,227
I'm sorry. I wasn't listening.
1411
01:25:50,729 --> 01:25:51,771
Ow!
1412
01:25:51,855 --> 01:25:53,439
Fucking fascist!
1413
01:25:55,067 --> 01:25:57,235
Stay out of Malibu,
Lebowski.
1414
01:25:58,070 --> 01:26:00,196
Stay out of Malibu, deadbeat!
1415
01:26:01,365 --> 01:26:05,868
Keep your ugly, fucking, gold-bricking
ass out of my beach community.
1416
01:26:06,036 --> 01:26:08,704
I want to sleep with you
1417
01:26:08,789 --> 01:26:11,916
In the desert tonight
1418
01:26:13,168 --> 01:26:17,797
With a billion stars
all around
1419
01:26:18,674 --> 01:26:21,843
Jesus, man. Could you
change the channel?
1420
01:26:21,927 --> 01:26:23,594
Fuck you, man!
If you don't like my fucking music,
1421
01:26:23,679 --> 01:26:25,179
get your own fucking cab!
1422
01:26:25,264 --> 01:26:26,347
I had a really rough. ..
1423
01:26:26,431 --> 01:26:28,182
I'll pull off to the side
and kick your ass out.
1424
01:26:28,267 --> 01:26:32,979
Man, come on. I had a rough night,
and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.
1425
01:26:40,737 --> 01:26:43,322
Out of my fucking cab! Out!
Man!
1426
01:26:44,783 --> 01:26:46,951
Man ! Man ! Hey!
1427
01:26:58,130 --> 01:27:02,049
There's a thousand pretty
women waiting out there
1428
01:27:02,134 --> 01:27:05,887
And they're all livin'
devil may care
1429
01:27:05,971 --> 01:27:09,557
And I'm just the devil
with love to spare
1430
01:27:09,808 --> 01:27:13,102
So viva Las Vegas
1431
01:27:13,937 --> 01:27:17,481
Viva Las Vegas
1432
01:27:29,494 --> 01:27:32,121
Oh, Jesus!
1433
01:27:52,059 --> 01:27:53,309
Jeffrey.
1434
01:27:54,227 --> 01:27:56,103
Maude?
Love me.
1435
01:27:58,899 --> 01:28:00,858
That's my robe.
1436
01:28:02,152 --> 01:28:04,070
Tell me about
yourself, Jeffrey.
1437
01:28:04,905 --> 01:28:07,156
Well, not much to tell.
1438
01:28:08,283 --> 01:28:13,913
I was one of the authors
of the Port Huron Statement.
1439
01:28:15,540 --> 01:28:17,917
The original Port Huron Statement.
Uh-huh.
1440
01:28:18,377 --> 01:28:21,921
Not the compromised
second draft.
1441
01:28:23,840 --> 01:28:25,549
Then I. ..
1442
01:28:26,718 --> 01:28:29,261
You ever hear of
the Seattle Seven?
1443
01:28:29,346 --> 01:28:30,721
That was me.
1444
01:28:33,976 --> 01:28:36,227
And there were
six other guys.
1445
01:28:37,771 --> 01:28:40,982
And then the music business,
briefly.
1446
01:28:41,066 --> 01:28:42,608
Oh?
Yeah.
1447
01:28:42,693 --> 01:28:44,402
Roadie for Metallica.
1448
01:28:44,486 --> 01:28:45,528
Oh.
1449
01:28:45,612 --> 01:28:47,113
Speed of Sound tour.
1450
01:28:47,489 --> 01:28:48,864
Mmm-hmm.
1451
01:28:49,324 --> 01:28:50,992
Bunch of assholes.
1452
01:28:52,285 --> 01:28:55,663
And then, you know, little
of this, little of that.
1453
01:28:57,040 --> 01:29:00,292
My career's slowed down
a little lately.
1454
01:29:00,377 --> 01:29:03,504
What do you do
for recreation?
1455
01:29:04,297 --> 01:29:05,756
Well, the usual.
1456
01:29:05,841 --> 01:29:08,634
Bowl, drive around,
1457
01:29:10,095 --> 01:29:12,430
the occasional
acid flashback.
1458
01:29:18,645 --> 01:29:20,730
What happened
to your house?
1459
01:29:20,814 --> 01:29:23,357
Oh, Jackie Treehorn
trashed the place.
1460
01:29:23,442 --> 01:29:26,360
He thought I had
your father's money.
1461
01:29:26,445 --> 01:29:29,613
He got me out of the way
while he looked for it.
1462
01:29:29,698 --> 01:29:31,824
Cocktail?
No, thanks.
1463
01:29:31,908 --> 01:29:34,994
It's not my father's money.
It's the foundation's.
1464
01:29:35,495 --> 01:29:38,789
Why did he think you have it?
Who does?
1465
01:29:38,874 --> 01:29:43,335
Oh, Larry Sellers, this high school kid.
Real fucking brat.
1466
01:29:43,420 --> 01:29:46,964
You know, this is a very
complicated case, Maude.
1467
01:29:47,049 --> 01:29:49,050
A lot of ins, a lot of outs.
1468
01:29:49,718 --> 01:29:54,263
You know, fortunately, I'm adhering
to a pretty strict, drug regimen
1469
01:29:54,347 --> 01:29:56,599
to keep my mind,
you know, limber,
1470
01:29:56,683 --> 01:30:00,227
and I'm very fucking close
to your father's money.
1471
01:30:00,312 --> 01:30:02,938
I keep telling you, it's
the foundation's money.
1472
01:30:03,023 --> 01:30:04,648
Father doesn't have any.
1473
01:30:06,234 --> 01:30:08,402
What are you talking about?
He's fucking loaded.
1474
01:30:08,487 --> 01:30:10,821
No, no. The wealth
is all Mother's.
1475
01:30:11,615 --> 01:30:13,074
No, he runs stuff.
1476
01:30:13,492 --> 01:30:15,701
We did let him run one
of the companies briefly,
1477
01:30:15,786 --> 01:30:18,704
but he didn't do very well at it.
Oh, he's, you know. ..
1478
01:30:18,789 --> 01:30:21,165
No, he helps administer
the charities now,
1479
01:30:21,249 --> 01:30:23,876
and I give him
a reasonable allowance.
1480
01:30:23,960 --> 01:30:25,628
He has no money of his own.
1481
01:30:25,712 --> 01:30:27,421
I know how he likes
to present himself.
1482
01:30:27,506 --> 01:30:30,800
Father's weakness is vanity,
hence the slut.
1483
01:30:33,053 --> 01:30:34,678
Do you think he. ..
1484
01:30:36,181 --> 01:30:37,515
What is that, yoga?
1485
01:30:37,599 --> 01:30:39,975
It increases the chances
of conception.
1486
01:30:42,938 --> 01:30:45,439
Increases. ..
Well, yes.
1487
01:30:45,524 --> 01:30:48,484
What did you think this was all about?
Fun and games?
1488
01:30:48,568 --> 01:30:50,111
I want a child.
1489
01:30:50,695 --> 01:30:52,530
Okay, yeah, okay.
1490
01:30:52,614 --> 01:30:55,449
But let me. . . Let me explain
something about the Dude.
1491
01:30:55,534 --> 01:30:58,994
Look, Jeffrey,
I don't want a partner.
1492
01:30:59,079 --> 01:31:02,790
In fact, I don't want the father to
be someone I have to see socially
1493
01:31:02,874 --> 01:31:05,960
or who will have any interest
in raising the child himself.
1494
01:31:07,379 --> 01:31:10,881
Oh. So, that doctor. ..
Exactly.
1495
01:31:11,967 --> 01:31:14,844
Now, what happened
to your face?
1496
01:31:15,470 --> 01:31:17,596
Did Jackie Treehorn
do that as well?
1497
01:31:17,681 --> 01:31:22,977
No, it was the chief of police
of Malibu, a real reactionary.
1498
01:31:23,061 --> 01:31:24,812
So, your father. ..
1499
01:31:26,815 --> 01:31:29,733
Oh, yeah, I get it.
Yeah. Yeah. What?
1500
01:31:29,818 --> 01:31:34,238
Oh, man. My thinking about this
case has become very uptight.
1501
01:31:34,322 --> 01:31:35,823
Yeah.
1502
01:31:35,907 --> 01:31:37,241
Your father.
1503
01:31:38,243 --> 01:31:41,245
Jeffrey, what are
you talking about?
1504
01:31:43,248 --> 01:31:44,248
Jeffrey!
1505
01:31:44,332 --> 01:31:47,126
Walter, if you're there, pick
up the fucking phone, man.
1506
01:31:47,210 --> 01:31:49,211
Come on, Walter.
1507
01:31:49,296 --> 01:31:52,506
Pick it up, man.
This is an emergency. Dude? Dude?
1508
01:31:52,591 --> 01:31:56,552
Yeah. Listen, Walter. I'm at my place.
I need you to come pick me up.
1509
01:31:56,636 --> 01:31:59,013
I can't drive, Dude.
It's Erev shabbos. What?
1510
01:31:59,097 --> 01:32:00,514
Erev shabbos.
What?
1511
01:32:00,599 --> 01:32:03,767
Erev shabbos. I can't drive.
Man!
1512
01:32:03,852 --> 01:32:06,478
I'm not even supposed to pick up the
phone unless it's an emergency.
1513
01:32:06,563 --> 01:32:09,940
This is a fucking emergency!
l understand.
1514
01:32:10,025 --> 01:32:11,609
That's why I picked up
the phone.
1515
01:32:11,693 --> 01:32:14,987
Walter, you fuck.
We gotta go to Pasadena, man.
1516
01:32:15,071 --> 01:32:17,323
Come pick me up or I'm off
the fucking bowling team.
1517
01:32:32,964 --> 01:32:35,424
Get out of that
fucking car, man!
1518
01:32:36,718 --> 01:32:38,761
Get out of that fucking car!
1519
01:32:38,845 --> 01:32:41,138
Get the fuck
out of the car, man.
1520
01:32:43,141 --> 01:32:45,142
Get out of the fucking. ..
1521
01:32:45,727 --> 01:32:47,561
Who the fuck are you, man?
Easy, man!
1522
01:32:47,646 --> 01:32:49,021
Relax, man.
1523
01:32:50,106 --> 01:32:51,774
No physical harm intended.
1524
01:32:51,858 --> 01:32:54,568
Who the fuck are you?
Why you following me around?
1525
01:32:54,694 --> 01:32:57,863
Come on, fuckhead! Relax, man.
I'm a brother shamus.
1526
01:32:58,865 --> 01:33:00,407
Brother Shamus?
1527
01:33:02,160 --> 01:33:03,827
Like an Irish monk?
1528
01:33:03,912 --> 01:33:05,788
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1529
01:33:05,872 --> 01:33:09,833
My name is Da Fino.
I'm a private snoop, like you, man.
1530
01:33:11,127 --> 01:33:13,170
What?
A dick, man.
1531
01:33:13,255 --> 01:33:16,382
And let me tell you something,
I dig your work.
1532
01:33:16,466 --> 01:33:19,426
Playing one side against the
other, in bed with everybody.
1533
01:33:19,511 --> 01:33:21,887
Fabulous stuff, man.
I'm not. ..
1534
01:33:21,972 --> 01:33:24,890
Fuck it, man. Just stay away
from my fucking lady friend.
1535
01:33:24,975 --> 01:33:27,518
Hey, I'm not messing
with your special lady.
1536
01:33:27,602 --> 01:33:30,104
She's not my special lady.
She's my fucking lady friend.
1537
01:33:30,230 --> 01:33:32,982
I'm just helping her conceive, man!
Hey, man. I'm not. ..
1538
01:33:33,066 --> 01:33:35,526
Who are you working for?
Lebowski?
1539
01:33:35,610 --> 01:33:37,027
Jackie Treehorn?
1540
01:33:38,863 --> 01:33:40,364
The Kneutsons.
1541
01:33:41,741 --> 01:33:44,368
Who the fuck are
the Kneutsons?
1542
01:33:44,452 --> 01:33:48,038
The Kneutsons, it's a
wandering daughter job.
1543
01:33:49,416 --> 01:33:51,959
Bunny Lebowski, man.
1544
01:33:52,043 --> 01:33:54,837
Her real name
is Fawn Kneutson.
1545
01:33:54,921 --> 01:33:56,880
Her parents
want her back, see?
1546
01:33:58,049 --> 01:34:00,009
Jesus fucking Christ.
1547
01:34:00,093 --> 01:34:03,012
Crazy, huh?
Ran away about a year ago.
1548
01:34:03,096 --> 01:34:06,807
The Kneutsons told me I should
show her this when I found her.
1549
01:34:06,891 --> 01:34:10,436
It's the family farm.
It's outside Moorhead, Minnesota.
1550
01:34:10,562 --> 01:34:13,647
They think it'll make her homesick.
Oh, boy.
1551
01:34:13,732 --> 01:34:15,357
How are you gonna keep them
down on the farm
1552
01:34:15,442 --> 01:34:17,401
once they've seen
Karl Hungus?
1553
01:34:18,028 --> 01:34:20,529
She's been kidnapped, Da Fino.
Oh, man.
1554
01:34:20,613 --> 01:34:21,822
Or I don't know.
Maybe not.
1555
01:34:21,906 --> 01:34:23,490
But she's definitely
not around.
1556
01:34:23,575 --> 01:34:27,494
Hey, maybe you and me
could pool our resources,
1557
01:34:27,912 --> 01:34:29,747
trade information.
1558
01:34:29,873 --> 01:34:31,665
Professional courtesy?
1559
01:34:32,250 --> 01:34:33,334
Compeers.
You know what I mean?
1560
01:34:33,418 --> 01:34:35,961
Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Fuck off, Da Fino.
1561
01:34:36,046 --> 01:34:38,172
And stay away
from my special. ..
1562
01:34:38,256 --> 01:34:41,175
From my fucking
lady friend, man!
1563
01:34:43,762 --> 01:34:45,679
The lingonberry pancake.
1564
01:34:50,185 --> 01:34:52,311
Lingonberry pancakes.
1565
01:34:55,940 --> 01:34:57,775
Three pigs in blanket.
1566
01:35:03,782 --> 01:35:05,657
She has
lingonberry pancakes.
1567
01:35:14,417 --> 01:35:17,711
I mean, we totally fucked it up, man.
We fucked up his payoff.
1568
01:35:17,796 --> 01:35:20,005
We got the kidnappers
all pissed off.
1569
01:35:20,090 --> 01:35:22,341
And Lebowski, you know,
he yelled at me a lot,
1570
01:35:22,425 --> 01:35:24,551
but he didn't do
anything, huh?
1571
01:35:24,677 --> 01:35:26,887
Well, sometimes it's a cathartic.
.. No, no.
1572
01:35:26,971 --> 01:35:29,264
I'm saying that
if he knows I'm a fuckup,
1573
01:35:29,349 --> 01:35:31,725
why does he leave me in charge
of getting his wife back?
1574
01:35:31,810 --> 01:35:35,145
Because he doesn't
fucking want her back, man.
1575
01:35:35,230 --> 01:35:38,399
He's had enough. He no longer digs her.
it's all a show.
1576
01:35:38,483 --> 01:35:42,903
Okay, but then why doesn't he give
a shit about his million bucks?
1577
01:35:42,987 --> 01:35:45,656
I mean, he knows we never
handed off his briefcase,
1578
01:35:45,824 --> 01:35:47,825
but he never asked
for it back.
1579
01:35:47,909 --> 01:35:50,994
The million bucks
was never in the briefcase.
1580
01:35:51,663 --> 01:35:54,706
The briefcase was
fucking empty, man.
1581
01:35:54,791 --> 01:35:57,459
The asshole was hoping
that they would kill her.
1582
01:35:57,544 --> 01:36:00,087
You threw out a ringer
for a ringer.
1583
01:36:00,171 --> 01:36:03,924
Okay, but how does all this
add up to an emergency?
1584
01:36:04,008 --> 01:36:08,220
I'm saying, I see what you're getting at, Dude.
He kept the money.
1585
01:36:08,304 --> 01:36:10,139
My point is. ..
1586
01:36:10,223 --> 01:36:13,434
Here we are, it's shabbos,
the Sabbath,
1587
01:36:13,518 --> 01:36:17,563
which I'm allowed to break only if
it's a matter of life or death.
1588
01:36:17,647 --> 01:36:20,983
Will you come off it, Walter?
You're not even fucking Jewish, man.
1589
01:36:21,067 --> 01:36:22,734
What the fuck are
you talking about?
1590
01:36:22,819 --> 01:36:24,194
Man, you're fucking
Polish Catholic!
1591
01:36:24,279 --> 01:36:25,904
What the fuck
are you talking about?
1592
01:36:25,989 --> 01:36:28,115
I converted when I married Cynthia.
Come on, Dude.
1593
01:36:28,199 --> 01:36:30,200
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know this.
1594
01:36:30,285 --> 01:36:32,536
And five fucking years ago,
you were divorced.
1595
01:36:32,620 --> 01:36:34,121
So what are you saying?
When you get divorced,
1596
01:36:34,205 --> 01:36:36,331
you turn in your library card?
You get a new license?
1597
01:36:36,416 --> 01:36:39,501
You stop being Jewish?
This is the driveway.
1598
01:36:39,586 --> 01:36:41,628
Jewish as fucking Tevye.
Man.
1599
01:36:41,713 --> 01:36:45,966
You know, it's all a part
of your sick Cynthia thing.
1600
01:36:46,050 --> 01:36:49,970
Man, taking care of her fucking dog,
going to her fucking synagogue.
1601
01:36:50,054 --> 01:36:51,889
You're living in
the fucking past.
1602
01:36:51,973 --> 01:36:55,309
Three thousand years of beautiful
tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax.
1603
01:36:55,393 --> 01:36:58,353
You're goddamn right I'm
living in the fucking past!
1604
01:36:58,438 --> 01:37:00,564
I've. . . Jesus.
1605
01:37:01,816 --> 01:37:03,734
What the hell happened?
1606
01:37:04,652 --> 01:37:07,488
So viva Las Vegas
1607
01:37:08,907 --> 01:37:11,825
Viva Las Vegas
1608
01:37:16,748 --> 01:37:18,749
Let's go. Fuck it.
1609
01:37:23,087 --> 01:37:24,505
Where was she, man?
1610
01:37:24,589 --> 01:37:26,590
Visiting friends of hers
in Palm Springs.
1611
01:37:26,674 --> 01:37:29,092
She just picked up and left,
never bothered to tell us.
1612
01:37:29,177 --> 01:37:31,678
Well, I guess the fucking
nihilists knew where she was.
1613
01:37:31,763 --> 01:37:33,931
Jesus, Dude. She never
even kidnapped herself.
1614
01:37:34,057 --> 01:37:37,392
Who is this gentleman, Dude?
Who am I? I'm a fucking veteran.
1615
01:37:37,477 --> 01:37:38,685
Come on!
That's who I am.
1616
01:37:38,770 --> 01:37:41,313
You shouldn't go in there, Dude.
He's very angry.
1617
01:37:43,650 --> 01:37:45,025
So, man.
1618
01:37:45,109 --> 01:37:48,904
So? She's back,
no thanks to you.
1619
01:37:48,988 --> 01:37:51,365
Where's the fucking money,
Lebowski?
1620
01:37:51,449 --> 01:37:54,785
A million bucks from fucking,
needy, little Urban Achievers!
1621
01:37:54,869 --> 01:37:56,370
You are scum, man!
1622
01:37:56,454 --> 01:37:58,705
Who the hell is he?
Who am I? Who am I?
1623
01:37:58,790 --> 01:38:00,374
Walter. I'm the guy that's
gonna kick your phony,
1624
01:38:00,458 --> 01:38:01,792
gold-bricking ass, that's who I am.
Man.
1625
01:38:01,876 --> 01:38:03,710
We know the briefcase
was fucking empty.
1626
01:38:03,795 --> 01:38:05,837
We know you kept the million
bucks for yourself.
1627
01:38:05,922 --> 01:38:07,506
You have your story,
I have mine.
1628
01:38:07,590 --> 01:38:10,884
I say I entrusted the money
to you and you stole it.
1629
01:38:10,969 --> 01:38:14,179
As if we would ever dream of
taking your bullshit money!
1630
01:38:14,264 --> 01:38:16,473
You thought that Bunny
had been kidnapped,
1631
01:38:16,558 --> 01:38:18,141
and you were
fucking glad, man.
1632
01:38:18,226 --> 01:38:20,477
You could use it as an excuse
to make some money disappear.
1633
01:38:20,562 --> 01:38:23,855
All you needed was a sap to pin it on.
You just met me.
1634
01:38:23,940 --> 01:38:26,858
You. . . You human paraquat.
1635
01:38:26,943 --> 01:38:30,404
You figured, "Oh, here's a
loser, you know, a deadbeat.
1636
01:38:30,488 --> 01:38:33,073
"Somebody this square community
won't give a shit about."
1637
01:38:33,157 --> 01:38:34,741
Well, aren't you?
1638
01:38:35,994 --> 01:38:39,746
Well, yeah, but. ..
Get out, both of you.
1639
01:38:39,831 --> 01:38:43,083
Look at that fucking phony, Dude,
pretending to be a fucking millionaire.
1640
01:38:43,167 --> 01:38:45,460
Out of this house now,
you bums!
1641
01:38:45,545 --> 01:38:47,129
Let me tell you
something else.
1642
01:38:47,213 --> 01:38:50,966
I've seen a lot of spinals,
Dude, and this guy's a fake.
1643
01:38:51,676 --> 01:38:54,845
A fucking gold-bricker.
Stay away from me, mister!
1644
01:38:54,929 --> 01:38:56,597
This guy fucking walks.
1645
01:38:56,681 --> 01:38:59,016
I've never been more certain
of anything in my life.
1646
01:38:59,100 --> 01:39:00,267
You stay away from me!
1647
01:39:00,351 --> 01:39:02,728
Walter, for Christ's sake,
man ! He's a cripple.
1648
01:39:02,854 --> 01:39:04,646
I said ! Get away from me!
Come on. Come on.
1649
01:39:08,276 --> 01:39:11,945
Yeah, I'll put him down, Dude.
Walk! Achtung, baby!
1650
01:39:29,213 --> 01:39:32,341
Come on, man. Help me
put him back in his chair.
1651
01:39:36,262 --> 01:39:38,263
At least they had the
fucking decency to tell us
1652
01:39:38,348 --> 01:39:40,724
that we were fighting
the communists.
1653
01:39:43,227 --> 01:39:46,647
Whereas this whole fucking thing,
this whole fucking thing
1654
01:39:46,731 --> 01:39:49,566
is nothing about nothing,
about oil,
1655
01:39:49,651 --> 01:39:51,985
which is what I personally
hear, Dude.
1656
01:39:52,070 --> 01:39:54,363
Sure you'll see
some tank battles,
1657
01:39:54,447 --> 01:39:57,991
but fighting in desert is very different
from fighting in canopy jungle.
1658
01:39:59,077 --> 01:40:02,496
I mean, Nam was a foot soldier's
war, whereas this thing should. ..
1659
01:40:03,456 --> 01:40:05,707
You know, should be
a piece of cake.
1660
01:40:05,792 --> 01:40:09,211
I mean, I had an M1 6, Jacko,
not an Abrams fucking tank.
1661
01:40:09,337 --> 01:40:12,714
Me and Charlie, eyeball to eyeball.
Yeah.
1662
01:40:12,799 --> 01:40:15,133
That's fucking combat.
1663
01:40:15,218 --> 01:40:18,095
The man in the black
pajamas, Dude.
1664
01:40:18,179 --> 01:40:20,055
Worthy fucking adversary.
1665
01:40:20,139 --> 01:40:23,558
Who's in pajamas, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
1666
01:40:23,643 --> 01:40:25,852
Whereas what we have here,
1667
01:40:25,937 --> 01:40:28,105
a bunch of fig eaters wearing
towels on their head,
1668
01:40:28,189 --> 01:40:30,357
trying to find reverse
on a Soviet tank.
1669
01:40:31,234 --> 01:40:33,402
This is not a worthy
fucking adversary. Hey!
1670
01:40:33,486 --> 01:40:35,529
What's this
day-of-rest shit?
1671
01:40:35,613 --> 01:40:37,197
What's this bullshit?
1672
01:40:37,281 --> 01:40:40,325
I don't fucking care!
It don't matter to Jesus.
1673
01:40:40,410 --> 01:40:41,868
But you not fooling me,
man.
1674
01:40:41,953 --> 01:40:44,663
You might fool the fucks
in the league office
1675
01:40:44,747 --> 01:40:47,040
but you don't fool Jesus.
1676
01:40:47,208 --> 01:40:49,918
It's Bush league
psych-out stuff.
1677
01:40:50,002 --> 01:40:51,420
Laughable, man!
1678
01:40:52,588 --> 01:40:55,674
I would've fucked you
in the ass Saturday.
1679
01:40:56,426 --> 01:40:59,344
I'll fuck you in the ass
next Wednesday instead.
1680
01:41:00,805 --> 01:41:03,265
You got a date
Wednesday, baby!
1681
01:41:08,146 --> 01:41:09,312
He's cracking.
1682
01:41:09,397 --> 01:41:11,106
. . .the whole concept of age.
1683
01:41:11,190 --> 01:41:13,400
I mean, many learned men
have disputed this
1684
01:41:13,484 --> 01:41:16,319
but in the 1 4th century,
the Rambam. ..
1685
01:41:26,330 --> 01:41:28,540
Well, they finally
did it.
1686
01:41:28,624 --> 01:41:30,751
They killed
my fucking car.
1687
01:41:30,835 --> 01:41:34,421
We want the money,
Lebowski.
1688
01:41:34,505 --> 01:41:37,007
Ja. Otherwise,
we kill the girl.
1689
01:41:37,091 --> 01:41:40,594
Ja. It seems you have forgotten
our little deal, Lebowski.
1690
01:41:40,678 --> 01:41:43,430
You don't have the
fucking girl, dipshit.
1691
01:41:43,514 --> 01:41:45,766
We know you never did.
1692
01:41:45,850 --> 01:41:47,434
Are these the Nazis,
Walter?
1693
01:41:47,518 --> 01:41:49,227
No, Donny.
These men are nihilists.
1694
01:41:49,312 --> 01:41:50,729
There's nothing
to be afraid of.
1695
01:41:52,398 --> 01:41:53,482
We don't care.
1696
01:41:53,566 --> 01:41:58,028
We still want the money,
Lebowski, or we fuck you up.
1697
01:41:58,112 --> 01:42:00,781
Fuck you. Fuck the three of you.
Cool it, Walter.
1698
01:42:00,865 --> 01:42:04,701
No. Without a hostage,
there is no ransom.
1699
01:42:04,786 --> 01:42:08,121
That's what ransom is.
Those are the fucking rules.
1700
01:42:08,206 --> 01:42:10,540
His girlfriend
gave up her toe.
1701
01:42:10,625 --> 01:42:12,959
She thought we could
get $1 million.
1702
01:42:13,044 --> 01:42:15,545
It's not fair.
Fair?
1703
01:42:15,630 --> 01:42:19,257
Who's the fucking nihilists around
here, you bunch of fucking crybabies?
1704
01:42:19,342 --> 01:42:21,718
Cool it, Walter.
Hey, look, pal.
1705
01:42:21,803 --> 01:42:23,512
There never
was any money.
1706
01:42:23,596 --> 01:42:25,722
The big Lebowski gave me
an empty briefcase,
1707
01:42:25,807 --> 01:42:27,849
so take it up with him, man.
1708
01:42:27,934 --> 01:42:30,477
And I would like
my undies back.
1709
01:42:30,561 --> 01:42:31,770
Are these guys gonna
hurt us, Walter?
1710
01:42:31,854 --> 01:42:34,314
No, Donny.
These men are cowards.
1711
01:42:34,398 --> 01:42:35,690
Okay!
1712
01:42:35,775 --> 01:42:39,319
So we takes the money you have
on you, and we calls it even.
1713
01:42:40,738 --> 01:42:42,781
Fuck you.
Hey, no. Come on, Walter.
1714
01:42:42,865 --> 01:42:44,866
Come on, we're ending
this thing cheap, man.
1715
01:42:44,951 --> 01:42:47,536
No. What's mine is mine.
No, come on, Walter.
1716
01:42:47,620 --> 01:42:49,830
No funny stuff.
All right. All right.
1717
01:42:49,914 --> 01:42:54,668
No funny stuff.
I got 4 bucks, almost 5.
1718
01:42:54,752 --> 01:42:57,337
- I got $1 8.
- What's mine is mine.
1719
01:42:57,421 --> 01:43:00,549
We fuck you up, man!
We takes the money!
1720
01:43:01,092 --> 01:43:02,425
Come and get it.
1721
01:43:03,761 --> 01:43:08,014
We fuck you up!
Show me what you got, nihilists.
1722
01:43:08,099 --> 01:43:10,559
I fuck you! Walter, come on.
He's got a sword.
1723
01:43:10,643 --> 01:43:12,853
Fucking dipshit with
a nine-toed woman!
1724
01:43:12,937 --> 01:43:16,773
I fuck you ! Fuck you!
I fuck you!
1725
01:43:22,947 --> 01:43:24,614
Take it easy, man.
I fuck you!
1726
01:43:24,699 --> 01:43:26,616
Take the $4.
I fuck you!
1727
01:43:30,955 --> 01:43:31,997
I fuck you!
1728
01:43:32,081 --> 01:43:33,957
I'm gonna hit you with
the fucking ball, man.
1729
01:43:38,713 --> 01:43:40,839
Hey, dickhead!
Anti-Semite.
1730
01:43:41,799 --> 01:43:44,509
I fuck you in the ass!
I fuck you in the ass!
1731
01:43:44,594 --> 01:43:49,806
I fuck you ! I fuck you!
1732
01:43:56,063 --> 01:43:58,023
We got a man down, Dude!
1733
01:44:01,736 --> 01:44:02,944
Oh, God. They shot him, man.
1734
01:44:03,029 --> 01:44:05,238
He's not shot. No, Dude.
Are you shot, Donny?
1735
01:44:05,364 --> 01:44:07,657
There weren't any shots fired.
Huh?
1736
01:44:07,742 --> 01:44:10,994
It's a heart attack.
Call the medics, Dude.
1737
01:44:11,537 --> 01:44:14,372
I'd go myself, but I'm pumping
blood, might pass out.
1738
01:44:14,457 --> 01:44:17,751
Rest easy, good buddy.
You're doing fine.
1739
01:44:17,835 --> 01:44:20,253
We got help choppering in.
1740
01:44:47,782 --> 01:44:49,449
Hello, gentlemen.
1741
01:44:49,533 --> 01:44:51,785
You are the bereaved?
Yeah, man.
1742
01:44:52,453 --> 01:44:55,121
Francis Donnelly,
pleased to meet you.
1743
01:44:55,206 --> 01:44:57,499
Jeff Lebowski.
Walter Sobchak.
1744
01:44:57,583 --> 01:44:59,834
The Dude actually is. ..
1745
01:45:00,878 --> 01:45:02,796
Excuse me?
Oh, nothing.
1746
01:45:04,632 --> 01:45:09,302
Yes. I understand you're
taking away the remains?
1747
01:45:09,387 --> 01:45:10,553
Yeah.
1748
01:45:11,305 --> 01:45:13,098
We have the urn.
1749
01:45:14,475 --> 01:45:16,685
I assume this is credit card?
1750
01:45:17,895 --> 01:45:18,979
Yeah.
1751
01:45:33,661 --> 01:45:35,078
What's this?
1752
01:45:35,830 --> 01:45:37,497
Now, that's for the urn.
1753
01:45:37,581 --> 01:45:39,582
Don't need it.
We're scattering the ashes.
1754
01:45:40,376 --> 01:45:43,003
Yes. So we were informed.
1755
01:45:43,087 --> 01:45:46,840
However, we must, of course,
transmit the remains to you
1756
01:45:46,924 --> 01:45:48,508
in a receptacle.
1757
01:45:49,760 --> 01:45:51,553
That's $1 80.
1758
01:45:51,887 --> 01:45:55,807
It is our most modestly
priced receptacle.
1759
01:45:56,142 --> 01:45:58,309
Well, can't we just. ..
$1 80?
1760
01:45:58,394 --> 01:46:00,395
They range up to $3,000.
1761
01:46:01,188 --> 01:46:04,315
We're. .. Can't we just
rent it from you, you know?
1762
01:46:04,400 --> 01:46:07,193
Sir, this is a mortuary
not a rental house.
1763
01:46:07,319 --> 01:46:09,654
We're scattering the fucking ashes!
Walter, Walter.
1764
01:46:09,739 --> 01:46:12,240
Just because we're bereaved
doesn't make us saps.
1765
01:46:12,324 --> 01:46:14,701
Sir, please lower
your voices.
1766
01:46:14,785 --> 01:46:18,872
Man, don't you have, you know,
something else we can put him in?
1767
01:46:18,956 --> 01:46:19,998
You know?
1768
01:46:20,082 --> 01:46:23,126
That is our most modestly
priced receptacle.
1769
01:46:23,419 --> 01:46:25,003
God damn it!
1770
01:46:27,131 --> 01:46:28,798
Is there a Ralph's
around here?
1771
01:46:55,826 --> 01:46:58,495
Donny was a good bowler
and a good man.
1772
01:46:59,747 --> 01:47:01,873
He was one of us.
1773
01:47:01,957 --> 01:47:05,877
He was a man who loved
the outdoors and bowling.
1774
01:47:06,003 --> 01:47:09,756
And as a surfer he explored the
beaches of Southern California
1775
01:47:09,840 --> 01:47:12,634
from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo
1776
01:47:12,718 --> 01:47:15,303
and up to Pismo.
1777
01:47:16,097 --> 01:47:17,347
He died. ..
1778
01:47:18,349 --> 01:47:22,435
He died as so many young men of
his generation, before his time.
1779
01:47:22,520 --> 01:47:25,688
In your wisdom, Lord,
you took him,
1780
01:47:25,815 --> 01:47:29,109
as you took so many bright,
flowering young men
1781
01:47:29,193 --> 01:47:32,028
at Khe Sanh, at Lan Doc,
1782
01:47:32,113 --> 01:47:33,863
at Hill 364.
1783
01:47:35,157 --> 01:47:37,534
These young men
gave their lives,
1784
01:47:38,119 --> 01:47:39,577
and so did Donny.
1785
01:47:41,705 --> 01:47:43,706
Donny, who loved bowling.
1786
01:47:46,752 --> 01:47:47,752
And so,
1787
01:47:49,380 --> 01:47:51,756
Theodore Donald Kerabatsos,
1788
01:47:53,050 --> 01:47:58,179
in accordance with what we think your
dying wishes might well have been,
1789
01:47:59,515 --> 01:48:02,308
we commit your final
mortal remains
1790
01:48:03,227 --> 01:48:05,603
to the bosom of
the Pacific Ocean
1791
01:48:07,064 --> 01:48:09,065
which you loved so well.
1792
01:48:11,402 --> 01:48:13,486
Good night, sweet prince.
1793
01:48:28,627 --> 01:48:30,044
Shit.
1794
01:48:31,964 --> 01:48:34,007
Oh, shit, Dude. I'm sorry.
1795
01:48:35,801 --> 01:48:38,928
Goddamn wind.
Fuck, god damn it, Walter!
1796
01:48:39,013 --> 01:48:41,306
You fucking asshole!
Shit, Dude. I'm sorry.
1797
01:48:41,390 --> 01:48:43,600
Everything's a fucking
travesty with you, man!
1798
01:48:43,684 --> 01:48:45,268
I'm sorry.
It was an accident.
1799
01:48:45,352 --> 01:48:47,854
What was that shit about Vietnam?
Dude, I'm sorry.
1800
01:48:47,938 --> 01:48:50,231
What the fuck does anything
have to do with Vietnam?
1801
01:48:50,316 --> 01:48:52,317
Dude, I'm sorry.
What the fuck are you talking about?
1802
01:48:52,401 --> 01:48:53,985
Dude, I'm sorry.
1803
01:48:56,906 --> 01:48:58,114
Fucking. ..
1804
01:49:05,122 --> 01:49:06,581
Fuck, Walter.
1805
01:49:08,459 --> 01:49:09,959
Come on, Dude.
1806
01:49:10,794 --> 01:49:12,462
Hey, fuck it, man.
1807
01:49:16,383 --> 01:49:18,009
Let's go bowling.
1808
01:49:41,492 --> 01:49:44,827
And when you're sittin' there
1809
01:49:45,454 --> 01:49:48,581
In your silk upholstered chair
1810
01:49:50,084 --> 01:49:54,128
Talkin' to some rich folks
that you know
1811
01:49:57,466 --> 01:50:00,301
Well, I hope you don't see me
1812
01:50:01,303 --> 01:50:04,514
In my ragged company
1813
01:50:05,307 --> 01:50:10,353
Oh, but you know
l could never be alone
1814
01:50:12,523 --> 01:50:15,525
Two oat sodas, Gary.
Right. Good luck tomorrow.
1815
01:50:15,609 --> 01:50:19,070
Yeah, thanks, man.
I was sorry to hear about Donny.
1816
01:50:19,154 --> 01:50:22,031
Oh, yeah. Well, you know,
1817
01:50:22,866 --> 01:50:26,828
sometimes you eat the bear,
and sometimes, you know. ..
1818
01:50:26,912 --> 01:50:28,204
Hey, man.
1819
01:50:28,998 --> 01:50:32,166
How do you do, Dude?
I wondered if I'd see you again.
1820
01:50:32,251 --> 01:50:34,294
I wouldn't miss
the semis.
1821
01:50:34,378 --> 01:50:36,004
Oh, yeah?
How's things been going?
1822
01:50:36,088 --> 01:50:39,215
Well, you know, strikes and
gutters, ups and downs.
1823
01:50:39,300 --> 01:50:42,010
Sure. I got you.
Yeah.
1824
01:50:43,554 --> 01:50:44,595
Thanks, Gary.
1825
01:50:44,680 --> 01:50:47,015
Well, take care, man.
Gotta get back.
1826
01:50:47,099 --> 01:50:50,143
Sure. Take it easy, Dude.
Oh, yeah.
1827
01:50:50,227 --> 01:50:52,312
I know that you will.
1828
01:50:52,396 --> 01:50:55,732
Yeah. Well,
the Dude abides.
1829
01:50:59,737 --> 01:51:00,945
Walter.
1830
01:51:02,656 --> 01:51:04,615
The Dude abides.
1831
01:51:08,537 --> 01:51:11,873
I don't know about you,
but I take comfort in that.
1832
01:51:13,167 --> 01:51:15,376
It's good knowing
he's out there,
1833
01:51:15,461 --> 01:51:19,547
the Dude, taking her easy
for all us sinners.
1834
01:51:22,259 --> 01:51:24,427
I sure hope
he makes the finals.
1835
01:51:26,055 --> 01:51:28,181
Well, that about does her.
1836
01:51:28,265 --> 01:51:29,766
Wraps her all up.
1837
01:51:31,352 --> 01:51:34,812
Things seem to have worked out
pretty good for the Dude and Walter.
1838
01:51:35,481 --> 01:51:38,775
And it was a pretty good
story, don't you think?
1839
01:51:39,610 --> 01:51:41,944
Made me laugh
to beat the band.
1840
01:51:42,613 --> 01:51:44,072
Parts anyway.
1841
01:51:45,616 --> 01:51:47,784
I didn't like seeing Donny go.
1842
01:51:48,911 --> 01:51:53,956
But then I happen to know that there's
a little Lebowski on the way.
1843
01:51:55,626 --> 01:51:58,961
I guess that's the way the whole
darned human comedy keeps
1844
01:51:59,505 --> 01:52:01,839
perpetuating itself
1845
01:52:01,924 --> 01:52:04,092
down through the generations.
1846
01:52:04,593 --> 01:52:08,846
Westward the wagons, across the
sands of time until we. ..
1847
01:52:10,057 --> 01:52:13,267
Oh, look at me.
I'm rambling again.
1848
01:52:14,645 --> 01:52:17,146
Well, I hope you folks
enjoyed yourselves.
1849
01:52:17,648 --> 01:52:19,982
Catch you later on
down the trail.
1850
01:52:21,151 --> 01:52:24,278
Say, friend, you got any more
of that good sarsaparilla?
1851
01:52:47,219 --> 01:52:51,222
Take me down, little Susie
1852
01:52:51,306 --> 01:52:53,141
Take me down
1853
01:52:56,437 --> 01:52:58,938
I know you think
you're the queen
1854
01:52:59,022 --> 01:53:01,149
Of the underground
1855
01:53:04,862 --> 01:53:09,824
Send me dead flowers
every morning
1856
01:53:13,203 --> 01:53:17,707
Send me dead flowers
by the mail
1857
01:53:21,503 --> 01:53:25,965
Send me dead flowers
to my wedding
1858
01:53:28,510 --> 01:53:35,475
And I won't forget to put
roses on your grave
1859
01:53:36,768 --> 01:53:41,105
No, I won't forget
to put roses
1860
01:53:41,190 --> 01:53:45,485
On your grave
1861
01:54:10,594 --> 01:54:15,139
Bright light city
gonna set my soul
1862
01:54:15,599 --> 01:54:19,310
Gonna set my soul on fire
1863
01:54:20,646 --> 01:54:25,775
Got a whole lot of money
that's ready to burn
1864
01:54:25,859 --> 01:54:29,487
So get those stakes up higher
1865
01:54:31,073 --> 01:54:35,826
There's a thousand pretty
women livin' out there
1866
01:54:36,578 --> 01:54:41,666
They're all livin'
devil may care
1867
01:54:41,750 --> 01:54:46,212
And I'm just a devil
with love to spare
1868
01:54:46,296 --> 01:54:50,550
So viva Las Vegas
1869
01:54:52,094 --> 01:54:56,138
Viva Las Vegas
1870
01:54:59,851 --> 01:55:04,522
Viva Las Vegas
with your neon flashing
1871
01:55:04,606 --> 01:55:07,567
And your one-arm
bandits crashing
1872
01:55:07,651 --> 01:55:11,237
All those hopes down the drain
1873
01:55:12,823 --> 01:55:17,994
Viva Las Vegas turnin'
day into nighttime
1874
01:55:18,078 --> 01:55:20,580
Night into daytime
1875
01:55:20,664 --> 01:55:22,832
If you see it once
1876
01:55:22,916 --> 01:55:29,338
You'll never be the same again
1877
01:55:31,383 --> 01:55:35,845
I'm gonna keep on
keep on runnin'
1878
01:55:35,929 --> 01:55:39,682
if it costs me
my very last dime
1879
01:55:41,184 --> 01:55:43,519
If I wind up broke
1880
01:55:43,604 --> 01:55:45,813
Well, I'll always remember
1881
01:55:45,897 --> 01:55:49,942
That I had a swingin' time
1882
01:55:51,778 --> 01:55:55,865
I'm gonna give it
everything I've got
1883
01:55:56,992 --> 01:56:01,203
Lady Luck, please
let the dice stay hot
1884
01:56:02,122 --> 01:56:06,626
Let me shoot a seven
on every shot
1885
01:56:06,710 --> 01:56:10,921
So viva Las Vegas
1886
01:56:12,466 --> 01:56:14,466
Viva Las Vegas
1887
01:56:22,684 --> 01:56:24,284
Viva
1888
01:56:35,113 --> 01:56:37,113
Las Vegas
1889
01:56:46,249 --> 01:56:49,585
Viva
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